'She wants to use you': Estranged uncle has no interest in meeting his sister's kids after being guilted into providing free childcare for weeks

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    Product - years ago had her second child (5M, 2F) I wasn't invited to the wedding and I haven't ever met her children nor husband. Our issue starts about a month ago when she called out of the hei AITA for not caring if I meet wamy niece or nephew US ust ust do that, I'd have to find someone to care for my animals nd my plants. She then said she would send the kids up to ne stay a few days, and then leave the kids with me for a few
  • 02
    Font - I was going to post this on AITA, but a good friend of mine recommend I post here for a "sane" response, so here we go. Backstory I (39M) and my sister (35F), whom we'll call K, were raised by some pretty boomerish parents. We didn't really fight as siblings, but we were not close. She did her own thing and I did mine. Other than me
  • 03
    Font - occasionally giving her rides to places or spotting her the rare $5, we didn't interact much. As for my parents, they would have probably called abusive, I never really felt abused. However, after being told "it's my way or the high way" for the millionth time when I turned 18 I joined the Marines and choose the highway option.
  • 04
    Font - To keep this as short as possible after that, my family wasn't really in my life other than the twice a year text. In the proceeding time I graduated from boot camp, was deployed twice, came back, went to college, graduated college, and started working at a nice IT job. My family would sometimes send a text or whatever if they remembered I had something going on, but they never showed up to anything.
  • 05
    Font - After about 5 years at my job the pandemic happened and they sent us to WFM. I immediately got a house out in the middle of nowhere and started pretty much homesteading. I grow a lot of my own food, I can, I raise animals, goats and chickens, and bow hunt. As someone who has suffered from depression for most of their life, I've honestly never been happier.
  • 06
    Font - Issue My sister stayed in our hometown and got married. About 2 years ago had her second child (5M, 2F) I wasn't invited to the wedding and I haven't ever met her children nor husband. Our issue starts about a month ago when she called out of the blue saying that she wanted the kids to be closer with their family and she'd like me to meet them. I live half
  • 07
    Font - the US away and wants me to come to her place. Obviously I can't just do that, I'd have to find someone to care for my animals and my plants. She then said she would send the kids up to me stay a few days, and then leave the kids with me for a few weeks once everyone was "settled in".
  • 08
    Font - Folks my house is the least kid friendly place since a nuclear silo. I have a fetching station for my bow, knives and stuff, I smoke pot, etc. Not to mention I have never cared for a child in my entire adult life.
  • 09
    Font - So I told her that she's more than welcome to stay, but when she leaves, the children do as well. You would have thought I punched the Pope right in the mouth for the way she blew up.
  • 10
    Font - Now my family, who texts me twice a year, some who have never called me since I left at 18, are blowing me up nonstop. I received more than 20 text messages yesterday alone. Half of them think it is my duty apparently to get in these kids lives and help support them. So AITA?
  • 11
    Font - Lastly, I'd just like to say for the record that I don't have a problem forming a bond with my niece and nephew, I'm concerned for their safety being left with me in a place they don't know. That would have scared 5 year old me.
  • 12
    Font - I'm going to call my sister in a few days after everyone has some time to cool down. I'm going to offer her FaceTime calls or pound sand.
  • 13
    Font - Admirable-Tree-2209 1 day ago NTA- What the hell??????? She just wants someone to bum her kids on for weeks. Block them, they don't have the time of day for you so why should you? That is crazy to me. Good luck
  • 14
    Font - Used-Plantain-7864 OP 23 hr. ago I actually hadn't considered this. She would have to have someone better than me though right?
  • 15
    Font - 5footfilly 23 hr. ago No. She's looking for free child care for whatever reason and everyone else turned her down. You said "and help support them", is she looking for money too? NTA by the way.
  • 16
    Font - ValkyrieKarma 16 hr. ago Response to nosey nepos: My set-up is hazardous for kids so it is not a good idea, but your concern is noted and shared with my sister who will appreciate the help.....when should I say you're available to watch her kids for several weeks?
  • 17
    Font - Dubbiely 22 hr. ago You have to understand she is not interested in you, in any kind of reconnecting. She wants to use you. You might not even see her. She just dumps her kids and leaves for a 3-4 week vacation with her new lover.
  • 18
    Font - Awesomekidsmom. 23 hr. ago To add to this - when relatives chime in, explain that you are not equipped to babysit, however since they feel it's important you will let your sister know that they are volunteering to watch the kids for a few weeks at a time

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