'Under special talents was, "Owns own gorilla suit"': 35+ Hiring managers who couldn't stop laughing at interviewee's resumes

Author image for Remy Millisky
Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Aug 19, 2023 11:00 AM EDT

These resumes and cover letters were supposed to land them a job, but these interviewees are getting laughed at behind closed doors. 

Hiring someone for a job position might seem easy at first — you post a job listing on a few sites, and the resumes should come pouring in. Depending on your industry, you might get 10 resumes, or 1000. But either way, not everyone will have the right qualifications. Some applicants actually do have the skills, but they have no clue how to format a resume and cover letter, leaving the hiring manager to figure out what you're trying to write. 

Some people wanted to add little details to make themselves stand out, like one guy who encouraged his wife to add her favorite TV shows to the resume. That's cute, and it might get her an interview with the right person, while other HR managers might frown upon the unprofessionalism of such a CV. Maybe that husband is onto something, though. Her resume will definitely stick in the head of whoever reads it! Maybe it will be a conversation starter that could let her show off her people skills and lead to a better connection. 

Up next, this manager was so fed up with these customers that he brought out a dictionary and literally read them a definition. 

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  • 01
    Font - Bosses of Reddit, what's the funniest thing you've read on a prospective employee's CV?
    via u/Davelbast
  • 02
    Font - afroguy10 A friend of mine who was coming up for 20 at the time had only really worked in a hotel washing dishes since he was 16. He'd decided to look for a job elsewhere, somewhere he could get a wee career going, so to try and make his job sound fancier he stated he'd been working as an "underwater ceramics technician" for the past 4 years.
    via u/afroguy10
  • 03
    Font - He got phoned up by the first company he handed a CV into and they offered him an interview because the guy said it was the best laugh he'd gotten all day reading CVS. He got the job which was 3 years ago now and he's been there since, seems a lot happier to be there.
    via u/afroguy10
  • 04
    Vertebrate - felixfelix Reference letter: "she does not suffer fools gladly"
    via u/felixfelix
  • 05
    Font - rabbitwarrens The most memorable I've had was some kid that had just graduated. The very last line on his cv was - "I know first hand that the importance of teamwork is often the difference between life and death." It was a part time retail position he was applying for..
    via u/rabbitwarrens
  • 06
    Font - + [deleted] Under "special skills" was listed: Word, Excel Typing 60 WPM Rolling like a log
    via u/deleted
  • 07
    Font - jawg6200 In a cover letter for a software engineering position (this is for a virtual, work-from-home job where we rarely/never meet in person): I own a $150 coffee machine and wear $12 shoes
    via u/jawg6200
  • 08
    Font - solaarphunk "Time Magazine Person of the Year, 2006" was listed under their accomplishments.
    via u/solaarphunk
  • 09
    Font - kneehitoagrasshopper. A prospective employee sent me a résumé that still had the instructions from the template in each line. "Education: put in your most recent education information here. John Marshall high School, graduated 2003."
    via u/kneehitoagrasshopper
  • 10
    Font - Yakko_Warner_esq Any special abilities or skills? "None. But I am strong and hansim(sic)."
    via u/Yakko_Warner_esq
  • 11
    Font - forg AgnesofthePunk I had a guy apply to be a financial advisor who was a former dynamite expert. He spelled dynamite three different ways. His email address was also something like "boomman."
    via u/AgnesofthePunk
  • 12
    Font - freealloc I'm guessing this was a case of characters lost in translation, but on an otherwise good resume... all his bullet points were hearts.
    via u/freealloc
  • 13
    Font - kelstaney Stay-at-home mom listed as "domestic engineer"
    via u/kelstaney
  • 14
    Font - JAZO roastbeeftacohat I was never a boss, but I once received a resume that was double sided. The front was about what you would expect, the back had all the videogames the dude had beaten.
    via u/roastbeeftacohat
  • 15
    Font - htufford "Skilled at CD-ROM" This was in 2012. *Edit: the same resume also noted that the applicant could "sustain loud voice for up to 4 hours." This was an office job.
    via u/htufford
  • 16
    Font - swimminginvinegar. I interviewed a woman for an entry level social service job. She had a Masters degree so I was confused why she was applying for this job. She was a little odd and socially awkward. On her resume it stated she worked at a major electronics store and her title was "Key Master". Apparently all she did was hold the key to the locked cabinets. This was
    via u/swimminginvinegar
  • 17
    Font - not a store with a lot of high end merchandise so there were maybe 3 locked areas. It felt to me that her boss gave her a made up title to keep her out of customers' way. I also used to read a lot of actor's headshots. My favorite under special talents was "owns own gorilla suit."
    via u/swimminginvinegar
  • 18
    Font - pcreese Had a guy hand in a resume for a very low level warehouse job. His qualifications were...sparse, but it didn't really matter for this position. Decided I'd bring him in for an interview and grabbed his resume to give him a ring...no phone number. No email. No address. Not a single piece of contact info. I probably could have used some google-fu to find him, but that's not really the point, is it?
    via u/pcreese
  • 19
    Font - shutupHazel My own Starbucks application makes me cringe thinking back, you have to say what your favourite Starbucks beverage is and why, I think I put 'Eggnog Latte, because it's rich, exclusive and great tasting..three things I hope to be!' It would have been the best Blind Date answer
    via u/shutupHazel
  • 20
    Font - Riig Application for super market: Morrisons If we had to relocate you to another Store which Store could you move to? Answer: Tesco or Asda
    via u/Riig
  • 21
    Font - [deleted] Home Coming Queen
    via u/deleted
  • 22
    Font - wby A resume that was completely blank except for one sentence: "I have no work experience."
    via u/wby
  • 23
    Font - Fiddlers Delight I read a guy's resume that stated he was "proficient in MS Soft Words"
    via u/FiddlersDelight
  • 24
    Font - PieRevelry New grad listed "Member of the National Geographic Society" AKA she had a subscription to the magazine.
    via u/PieRevelry
  • 25
    Font - Subcriminal One listed having an Oyster Card under achievements, another put 'being a nice person' in the same section.
    via u/Subcriminal
  • 26
    Font - apathetic_admin "I also make very good cupcakes with my mom" on a helpesk applicant's CV. We like cupcakes, so I wanted to hire him before I even met him, sadly he was not qualified for the position.
    via u/apathetic_admin
  • 27
    Font - steelers828 Not me but my wife got something to the effect of "Objective: to shine like a bright star in the career galaxy."
    via u/steelers828
  • 28
    Font - [deleted] This wasn't in a CV, but interviewing for an IT apprentice the other day I asked somebody what their greatest IT achievement was and they answered "installing Age of Empires on their uncle's laptop".
    via u/deleted
  • 29
    Font - EvictYou It was all written in Microsoft Excel... Which was kind of impressive, but more stupid.
    via u/EvictYou
  • 30
    Font - jebaw In language skills: "can write in multiple languages with Google Translate"
    via u/jebaw
  • 31
    Font - mitchjagger Cupcake Queen 2012. For a job at a project managing company.
    via u/mitchjagger
  • 32
    Font - ShadowPuppet1 My best friend was helping his wife create her resume, and asked me for me to look at it to get my thoughts. Under "other", it listed her favorite tv shows. I laughed, thinking he had shown this to me specifically so we could laugh at how dumb his wife was. Turned out, the tv shows were HIS idea to "humanize her."
    via u/ShadowPuppet1
  • 33
    Font - xposedbones For a job in a convenience store.. The guy wrote that he was good at drawing DnD map on paper...
    via u/xposedbones
  • 34
    Human body - crazy_family Detailed oriented
    via u/crazy_family
  • 35
    Font - igemoko "I was born on year of the tiger. I was raised with hard working graceful parents. I do the translations to English for company." That is tied with: "My major is the dentist." Both were in response to a job posting that required fluency in Korean and English.
    via u/igemoko
  • 36
    Font - + [deleted] On an application form: "Where did you hear about this job?" "My mum told me about it."
    via u/deleted
  • 37
    Font - Mezuzah I'm not a boss but my PhD supervisor showed me an application for an academic position in physics where the applicant added that he was the writer of a tune that at the time was a big hit in my country. My supervisor jokingly claims he did not hire the guy because he hated that tune.
    via u/Mezuzah
  • 38
    Font - pleatedmeat I had a lady apply for a promotion with a resume that included her elementary school and what she learned there.
    via u/pleatedmeat
  • 39
    Font - wazza_the_rockdog. One that kinda flawed me was a guy that applied for a job - no cover letter or resume attached, and his entire email consisted of "I'll take it." and his contact details. If it wasn't for the fact he was in the US and the job was in Australia I would have interviewed him!
    via u/wazza_the_rockdog
  • 40
    Font - Stickley Man I worked at a call centre years ago, and resumes would come in all the time. The best one I saw was a guy who listed "spelunking, macrame, Klingon translation, and time travel" under his hobbies. He didn't get hired, which is too bad. That guy would have been fun to work with. And, maybe, taken me to the future to fly around with a jetpack and/or explore some caves.
    via u/StickleyMan

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