34 of the Funniest Dad Joke Memes From Hilarious Husband’s About Their Witty Wives

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  • 01
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton Today 3 guys were beating up my mother-in-law, and my wife asked why I wasn't helping... I asked her "Don't you think three is enough?"
  • 02
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My wife said my driving made her scribble all over her student's paper I told her not to grade on a curve
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  • 03
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton The doctor told me my wife didn't make it and handed me a newborn baby... | gave it back and told him to give me the one my wife did make.
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  • 04
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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  • 05
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My wife was stopped by the cops tonight. They thought she might have been drink driving. The cop asked her to say the alphabet starting with the letter M. She said Malphabet.
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  • 06
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton Told my wife she had drawn her eyebrows a little high. She looked surprised.
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  • 07
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton Saw my wife yelling at our printer, she turned around and yelled at me, why isn't it working?! She wasn't impressed when i replied, "I don't have an inkling"
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  • 08
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton I asked my wife, "What do you call a group of babies?" She replied, "I don't know, what?" "An infantry!"
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  • 09
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton If you're writing a love story on your computer, avoid the spacebar. They separate characters.
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  • 10
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton Why do girls like Jewish guys with mineral bath yurts? Because they have hut spa.
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  • 11
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton I fed my wife some ground chick peas and she choked to death. The police are treating it as a hummuside
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  • 12
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton I think my new girlfriend is a ghost. I had my suspicion the moment she walked through the door.
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  • 13
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My wife said she wanted a new diamond so I gave her a stone. I hold her if she holds on to it as hard as she does the past, she would have one.
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  • 14
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton If you want to flirt with a Harry Potter fan... just Slytherin to their DMs.
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  • 15
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton I was engaged to a girl with a wooden leg... I got angry and broke it off.
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  • 16
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton Seeking one night stand. I might need two tho, I do have a lot of books.
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  • 17
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton I bought my wife a beautiful slinky dress... She looks amazing going down the stairs.
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  • 18
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My wife said I should start doing lunges to get healthier. That would be a big step forward.
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  • 19
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton A man with the last name Wong got married. So Mr. and Mrs. Wong had a baby. Why did they name it Left? Because two Wongs don't make a Right.
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  • 20
    Ball - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My ex wife still misses me. But her aim is getting better!
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  • 21
    Font - PAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton When my wife told me I had to stop impersonating a flamingo... I had to put my foot down
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  • 22
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton I would never date a tennis player. Love means nothing to them.
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  • 23
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My wife and I let astrology get between us It Taurus apart
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  • 24
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton I asked my wife how a fortune teller likes his steak... She sighed and said, "medium" I replied, "well done"
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  • 25
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My wife asked me if I've seen the dog bowl... I didn't even know he could!
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  • 26
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My girlfriend told me to stop singing Wonderwall I said maybeee
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  • 27
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My wife wants to split up after I bought the wrong coffee... I guess it's our grounds for divorce
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  • 28
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My wife asked me if I wanted to come to yoga. I replied, "Namaste home."
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  • 29
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My wife started our daughter's potty training today To show support, I left a note saying "you can do do this"
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  • 30
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My wife asked for me to hand her her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She's still not talking to me.
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  • 31
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My wife is mad at me for never putting down the toilet seat. To be honest, I'm getting a little tired of carrying it around.
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  • 32
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My wife thinks it's weird that I stare at the window during a heavy rainstorm. It would be a lot less weird if she'd just let me in.
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  • 33
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My wife kicked me out because of my terrible Arnold Schwarzenegger impressions, but don't worry. I'll return.
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  • 34
    Font - DAD JOKE Dad Joke Button @dadjokebutton My wife thinks we should allow our pets to share our bed. I finally gave in.... After 10 minutes, our goldfish finally settled down.
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