'It's voluntary, but has a "mandatory" vibe': Temp employee gets harangued for refusing to contribute a $25 donation for his boss's birthday lunch; goes straight to HR

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Jesse Kessenheimer • Writer and Editor
Sep 20, 2023 7:00 PM EDT

When employees are struggling to get a raise, fighting for overtime pay, nitpicking for a day more of PTO, it really grinds their gears when the out of touch boss asks THEM for money. However, as we all know, the audacity of C-level management and supervisors knows no bounds. CEO's and bosses everywhere are always trying to boost the team's morale or 'build company culture', but half the time, they lack the basic humanity to even understand how to do that. 

Usually, in most cases, these 'team building events' actually drive a wedge even further between management and the employees because bosses are so dissociated from the struggles of real world folks who live paycheck-to-paycheck, renting an apartment, and buying their own groceries. 

Unfathomable! 

So in this story, when a temp worker had been praised left and right for his good work, he thought that perhaps the company would reciprocate a little loyalty and offer him an in-house job. Instead, they asked him to contribute $25 to pay for his boss's birthday cake. 

Scroll for the full furious tale of rebellion and audacious managerial fumbles that cost one company a star-employee. For more stories of deluded people, check out this tale of a guy who roasts the hottest girl at the bar by asking to borrow a chair and leaving her bamboozled that he didn't ask her on a date. 

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  • 01
    Font - r/WorkAdvice . Posted by u/Remarkable_Flight857 Did my boss overstep regarding a "voluntary" birthday contribution? Need second opinion before going to HR.
    via Remarkable_Flight857
  • 02
    Font - Backstory: I work as a temp at an office. Been here since March! Severely underpaid (minimum wage in HCOL area), no benefits (or holiday pay, or sick pay, or PTO). Promised I would be made a permanent employee in July but they are postponing the offer, and
    via Remarkable_Flight857
  • 03
    Organism - they're saving hundreds of dollars per paycheck by keeping me as a temp. I know my worth, and I'm actively seeking new employment on top of studying for a career change. I don't receive holiday pay, so I'm already stretched thin this month
    via Remarkable_Flight857
  • 04
    Font - because of Labor Day. It's my boss's supervisor's birthday, and I received an email from my boss asking to contribute $25 to the birthday lunch. It's voluntary, but just like every birthday contribution prior to this, it has a "mandatory" vibe.
    via Remarkable_Flight857
  • 05
    Font - My coworkers and I looked at the menu, and the prices are an average of 12 dollars - so if you including tax, at most 15. That means 10 dollars per person to contribute to the birthday person's lunch. There's probably 50+
    via Remarkable_Flight857
  • 06
    Font - dollars left over after the lunch is covered - NO extra gift. My coworkers and I strongly suspect that my boss pockets the difference or uses it to get a free lunch himself. I ignored the two emails, but when my boss asked me in person about the
    via Remarkable_Flight857
  • 07
    Font - money, I told my boss directly that I would not be contributing to the lunch. He asked why, and I said I couldn't afford it. Then, he asked what I could afford - I initially told him 15, but then stuck to my gut and told him, "I just can't participate, I'm sorry."
    via Remarkable_Flight857
  • 08
    Font - The entire time, he was quiet and sounded annoyed. I felt super embarrassed and feel like the questions were invasive and judgmental.
    via Remarkable_Flight857
  • 09
    Font - I'm not setting out to burn any bridges, but this interaction rubbed me the wrong way. Not to mention, I learned that my boss's supervisor specifically told my boss NOT to do anything for her birthday, and she get upset if she found out he was asking for 25 dollars!
    via Remarkable_Flight857
  • 10
    Font - Is this something I should bring up with HR? Because I'm hoping to receive another job offer soon, I feel like this is a chance to express my concern without much consequence.
    via Remarkable_Flight857
  • 11
    Font - verminbury 4 days ago I would suggest you forward the email chain to your personal address. And yes, go to HR, but don't be surprised if they disappoint you.
    via verminbury
  • 12
    Font - Mic98125 4 days ago edited 2 days ago If Sarbanes-Oxley applies to your job, I would report it to a governing agency. Gifts never go up, they always go down.
    via Mic98125
  • 13
    Font - mmmkay938 2 days ago This should always be the case and anything otherwise is just wrong. Seems very "pay homage to the king" to pay for your boss's boss's lunch.
    via mmmkay938
  • 14
    Font - UIU jamkoch 3 days ago HR is there to protect the company, not you. Going to HR will just jeopardize your current job.
    via jamkoch
  • 15
    Font - PhatGrannie 3 days ago Don't go to HR. They will just end your assignment because you're a "problem". But when you're leaving, do tell your temp agency that they tried to extort money from you, a non-employee.
    via PhatGrannie
  • 16
    Font - Remarkable_Flight857 OP. 4 days ago Update! Todays the birthday! Another department was pitching in for donuts and bagels, and they invited my department to come celebrate. My boss rounded up the "lunch contributory" employees (who have earned their "keep") and they all headed up to the party.
    via Remarkable_Flight857
  • 17
    Font - Didn't even look or say anything to me, which is fine, as I didn't want to participate! BUT!!! Also found out that one of my coworkers who didn't want to spend 25 dollars, so
    via Remarkable_Flight857
  • 18
    Organism - just chipped in 10 to help cover for her lunch, ALSO wasn't invited. Plus my boss handed the money back to him. So rude and disrespectful! But my higher-upsupervisor
    via Remarkable_Flight857
  • 19
    Font - later messaged me and asked if I wanted a bagel or a donut, too, which was really nice! She obviously noticed my absence and wanted to make sure I was included.
    via Remarkable_Flight857
  • 20
    Font - Sunshine_Jules. 3 days ago 100% the birthday person got wind of it and shut it down. I bet everyone that paid got their money back. Get out as fast as you can.
    via Sunshine_Jules
  • 21
    Human body - Lipstick_Thespians 4 days ago I kind of think you ought to mention what happened to your higher-upsupervisor.
    via Lipstick_Thespians
  • 22
    Font - SallyFairmile 3 days ago Yes, do this OP. Gift-giving isn't supposed to go up the chain (certainly not contributions from a temp employee!), and your boss's boss will get that.
    via SallyFairmile
  • 23
    Gesture - 100 ен VE929900E HH
    via u/canva

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