Dungeons and Dragons Player Seeks Advice From Fellow Adventurers On What to Do With Ex Girlfriend’s Warlock Character Following Breakup

Author image for Eleonora Bader
Eleonora Bader
Jan 3, 2024 1:00 PM EST

You should always keep your character sheets… No exceptions. Or at least, that was the very first thing I was told when being prepped for the role of Dungeon Master. But unfortunately, sometimes our heart gets in the way, especially if we are playing with a loved one. This story really hit a chord with me, as I feel the familiar ting of pain hit me after going through something similar.

This Dungeon Master's girlfriend broke up with him one day before Christmas Eve. Talk about having a tough holiday… She was part of his Dungeons and Dragons Campaign, and she played a fiend warlock. After the breakup, OP didn't know what to do with her character. It's a fair question. So he turned to r/dnd for advice, as any DM would have done… Scroll down to read about the discussion his question sparked, and then check out this critical hit of Dungeons and Dragons memes for fireball-casting gamers…

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  • 01
    "My girlfriend broke up with me. What should I do with her character?"
    via Canva
  • 02
    Girlfriend is gone, what to do with her character? Table Disputes My girlfriend left me one day before Christmas Eve. She was part of my DnD group and played a fiend warlock. I don't want to end the campaign, since that would be unfair to the other players who are excited for the next session in January. What do I do with her character?
    via u/medioesp
  • 03
    ErsatzNihilist 2 days ago Just phase her out. The character gets a letter, puts on a serious look and tells the party she needs to go, and doesn't know when she'll be back. And then she never comes back. Or just hand wave her character into the background. People will understand, or at least they ought to.
    via u/ErsatzNihilist
  • 04
    Considering she's leaving the game because of a break up and you're the GM, either keeping the character around or exploding her with a fireball is going to potentially look a bit strange. You don't want to go all Lamentations of the Flame Princess with it, after all. 4.7k Reply Share
    via u/ErsatzNihilist
  • 05
    Cardboard_dad · 2 days ago Do not make her into a bad guy or take out your IRL feelings on her. It will be awkward and uncomfortable and most importantly not fun for anyone else. Don't prolong the character for the story's sake either. If it's clunky or narratively unsatisfying, people will forget about it by the next secession.
    via u/Cardboard_dad
  • 06
    Do make it quick and decisive. If you give them a rabbit, they'll chase it down the hole and you're off to wonderland, Alice. If it were me and since she's a warlock, an easy out is that her patron takes her. If they try to figure out why, it's not uncommon for patrons to force their subject to do things. Mayhaps, hers forced her down a path to that's no longer the one the party walks. A 57 V Reply Share
    via u/Cardboard_dad
  • 07
    Casey090 2 days ago Yeah, just tell the group in 1 sentence how she had to leave, and be done with it. In such cases, the direct solution is usually the best. 1.5k Reply Share Skolas519 2 days ago DM I must go, my planet needs me. Reply Share 529
    via u/Casey090, u/Skolas519
  • 08
    OpenTechie 2 days ago The patron pulls the character to the depths for a performance review. 1.4k Reply Share Archangel 2 days ago "Hello, I'm reaching out about your warlock powers extended warranty." 688 Reply Share
    via u/OpenTechie
  • 09
    Neige- 2 days ago Literally just start the first session without her with "she had a change of heart and left", your friends will understand 700 Reply Share
    via u/Neige-
  • 10
    IRefuseToPickAName 2 days ago This. I don't know why people need to have some in-story reason for a character to leave, or why every character needs a send- off or d th to write them out of the story. Carry on and roll the dice. A 148 Reply Share
    via u/IRefuseToPickAName
  • 11
    NadirPointing. 1 day ago Sometimes it can be Really jarring. Like if they were on a personal quest for her or was the one with the contact etc. But the answer is still the simplest and most direct. If you lose contact with a player and dont know their wishes just have the character resolve as much as is reasonable and take off on a private matter. And out of game ask the players to let it be. Makes things far less awkward if they come back too. Reply Share 14
    via u/NadirPointing
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    AmtsboteHannes - 2 days ago Warlock "[Character] decided life as an adventurer wasn't for them and went back to their hometown. So anyway, last session you were about to enter this dungeon..." A317 Reply Share Cjwithwolves 2 days ago This is how I would do it. "So and so had to go back home. They leave a letter wishing you well. Anyways....."
    via u/AmtsboteHannes, u/Cjwithwolves
  • 13
    PlanetNiles 2 days ago She goes up to her room (at the inn); never comes back down again. Is never mentioned again. I just realised that this sounds like a false hydra scenario. But this is what happened to a character in Happy Days. Reply Share 240 . DeepTakeGuitar - 2 days ago DM You're thinking of Family Matters IIRC 39 Reply Share
    via u/PlanetNiles, u/DeepTakeGuitar
  • 14
    caveman 7392. 2 days ago Just do like the Simpsons did to Poochie back in the day "I have to go my planet needs me" and just have her character float away. 95 Reply Share manOrmachine. 2 days ago Note: Poochie ched on the way back to his home planet. 39 Reply Share
    via u/caveman7392, u/man0rmachine
  • 15
    Clear-General-6014 2 days ago . Do not over complicate it. Before the next session message the other players. Say me and lady broke up. Leave her character unplayed and in the background. Focus on your friends and have fun. 77 Reply Share
    via u/Clear-eneral-6014
  • 16
    The GrooveWizard - 2 days ago Yeah I was gonna say. I wouldn't waste a moment on trying to explain it in lore or in game in anyway. Player left, the character left, it's a sticky situation and it's honestly easiest and the best to just above-the- table agree that the character was there for the former adventures, now they're not, and that's it. Making plot hooks and anything sort of open-ended leaves it a consideration for future games and in the world, when it's much easier to just cast handwav
    via u/TheGrooveWizard
  • 17
    Lucapardi 2 days ago [Poochie died on the way back to his home planet] But for real, if you can't pick up her character and the story allows it, just have a time skip of a few days where something happens to her. The party just have to deal with the aftermath. I'm sure the players will understand, you could even just pretend the character never existed. (Sorry for the breakup btw. Awful timing indeed, but maybe being around friends and family for the holidays will help)
    via u/Lucapardi
  • 18
    vanessaultimo - 2 days ago Just act like she was never there. We did that before with people who left the group. Had no issues. Reply Share 91 Nic-V 2 days ago DM This is the solution I would go with as well. No need to bring it up in the narrative, just hand wave it away. It doesn't really matter why they are gone after all, since the character will never come up again anyway Reply Share 15
    via u/vanessaultimo, u/Nic-V
  • 19
    EnvoySass 2 days ago Sorcerer You start the session and she gets immediately dragged down to Avernus by her patron and can't be saved because of contractual obligations. 55 Reply Share
    via u/EnvoySass
  • 20
    SRXRed 2 days ago Just carry on without her, no need to draw attention to anything. "obviously [name] won't be joining us anymore, anyway last session you were in a forest..." 29 Reply Share
    via u/SRxRed
  • 21
    Sunday SchoolBilly. 2 days ago Fiend Warlock? "SOMETHING SOMETHING PATRON INTERFERENCE..." Her patron summons her so she has no choice. Her patron was destroyed so she loses her power and leaves. Etc... 20 Reply Share
    via u/SundaySchoolBilly
  • 22
    adspems 2 days ago The one player I had drop out of the campaign early just 'decided to go back home to protect their people' at the start of the next session. I left it open for them to return but they never did. When the players arrived at that location for a different reason, that PC/NPC had d d as part of the ongoing conflict to stir some emotions and to avoid me having to RP them. A 13 Reply Share
    via u/adspems
  • 23
    Zaynara 2 days ago get a new girlfriend, have them play the old gf's character, bring them to next session and pretend like there was no change in girlfriend, kinda like what they did to warmachine in the mcu, or becky in that old Rosanne show 11 Reply Share
    via u/Zaynara
  • 24
    arceuspatronus - 2 days ago Of all the classes, a fiend warlock is probably among the easiest to just get dragged down to hell to meet the patron Reply Share 10
    via u/arceuspatronus

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