'She said that I'm a bully': Ignorant woman refuses to spell coworkers name correctly

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JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Jan 20, 2024 4:00 PM EST

What's in a name? A lot, actually. Names are incredibly important, and when people mess with them, it feels like a personal affront. We link our identities to our names so closely that they can feel like one and the same. As someone with a slightly difficult name, I feel great empathy for those whose names have been butchered in the mouths of hundreds, and folks who are constantly fielding clarifying questions when people ask them to introduce themselves. But it's the least we can do for each other. 

Getting names right is basic respect, especially in a work setting, where we'd like to be treated with the utmost. But some people are too ignorant for their own good, and rebuke any names that aren't also gospels of the Bible. Such is the case in this recent Reddit story where an inconsiderate coworker refused to learn a slightly hard name. Where is the respect?

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  • 01
    r/AmltheAsshole u/assholethrow93758 • 22h AITA for "bullying" a coworker who purposefully spells my name wrong?
    via u/assholethrow93758
  • 02
    My (F28) legal name is Saoirse, which is pronounced as "Seer-sha". I get that it isn't the easiest name to spell, so I usually don't give people who do it wrong a hard time or go by my middle name that's way easier to spell. To make it worse, my middle name is Rifle. Yes I'm not kidding. Basically my mum picked my first name and my dad did the middle name, unfortunately I have no ways of finding out what was the reason for that choice as they're no longer with us.
    via u/assholethrow93758
  • 03
    baby about my I have a coworker (F33) who's a name for some reason. Like I've been Sirsha, Siersha and Sasha (wtf woman) for some reason, and it was on paper so I had to contact the boss and have them redo the papers. And yes according to her Rifle isn't an actual name, won't be arguing here, but it's how it is on my ID and I can't do nothing about it. For reference her name is Kate, maybe she's jealous bc she has a boring name idk.
    via u/assholethrow93758
  • 04
    So I got fed up with her and started calling her Kathleen, Catelyn, Kylie, whatever just not Kate. Of course it made her like super upset and she started whining about how I'm being a bully. I said it's her who's being a bully who constantly misspells my name. She said my name is too hard, I told her to use my middle name instead and she started that it's "trashy" and "not an actual name". Like I said I didn't take no shit this time and told her that until she starts respecting my name I won't b
    via u/assholethrow93758
  • 05
    I reckon that maybe my response wasn't the gentlest but tbh I felt like she should get a taste of her own medicine. Also I reported her to the hr and they didn't do nothing bc the company we work for is kinda crappy.
    via u/assholethrow93758
  • 06
    LenoreSkellington • 22h Aficionado [19] NTA. Your name may be difficult to spell but it's not hard to learn a new word. You may have been a little blunt- sure- but when someone tells you YOUR NAME is not a real name. . well, that situation calls for blunt. It's no different than saying someone with the name Kay doesn't have a real name because it's a letter. I hope this woman learns to respect you a little more.
    via u/LenoreSkellington
  • 07
    imamakebaddecisions • 20h I can't believe she's admitting to being too stupid to spell her name. That's the part I would have pressed her on just to embarrass her. ΝΤΑ
    via u/imamakebaddecisions
  • 08
    Puzzleheaded-End-662 • 22h NTA I have an unusual name as well (though not as difficult to spell as yours) and it's important to me that people get it right. You're matching energy not bullying. Also you have a badass name Saoirse means freedom so your name is basically Freedom Rifle. Info: I'm guessing by your name and writing that you're Irish. Is this happening in Ireland or another country? Shame on her for belittling your name either way.
    via u/Puzzleheaded-End-662
  • 09
    assholethrow93758 OP. 22h It happened in the US, I was born and raised here. My mum was Irish though, guess it explains the name choice. Tbh I love my name mostly bc it reflects my heritage and also sounds badass. Idk if it makes sense.
    via u/assholethrow93758
  • 10
    Trust Comprehensive96 20h Guessing she's never heard of Saoirse Ronan, who probably helped a lot of American learn how to pronounce the name
    via u/TrustComprehensive96
  • 11
    storme_scourge • 22h Why didn't you go to hr about her in the first place?
    via u/storme_scourge
  • 12
    assholethrow 93758 OP. 22h I reported her to the HR and they said they'll look into it and basically did nothing.
    via u/assholethrow93758
  • 13
    Katie_Emm 22h Partassipant [3] ● As a card carrying Member if the I'll never find my name on novelty items club. As my actual name is pretty common but spelt differently I'm gonna say NTA!! If you've given her options and showed her how it's spelt and she is still getting it wrong especially for important paper work this is bad. I had a huge fight with an insurance claim because my name was spelt the correct way but not my way so they refused the claim. It was a huge mess!!
    via u/Katie_Emm
  • 14
    dishonestgandalf. 22h Pooperintendant [56] NTA, no excuse to age of email and slack. up a name's spelling in the
    via u/dishonestgandalf
  • 15
    Bitter Kaleidoscope52 • 22h Aficionado [11] I'm sorry but Saoirse Rifle is such a name. NTA. J cool
    via u/BitterKaleidoscope52
  • 16
    Fooftato 22h Enthusiast [8] NTA she called you trash. I'd be taking that pretty seriously.
    via u/Fooftato
  • 17
    asianingermany 22h. Enthusiast [6] NTA. Unless her IQ is double digit, Saoirse isn't difficult to spell especially since the rise of Saoirse Ronan's fame.
    via u/asianingermany

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terrible coworkers aita workplace-stories work stories work coworkers reddit story am i the asshole names workplace ignorant subreddit reddit thread Reddit difficult names
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