'I scanned... every receipt I could find': Scorned divorcee sends three years worth of finance documents to lawyer's office by fax machine

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    Ex's divorce lawyer: Send 3 years of complete financials or else. Me: As you wish. L OC TLDR at the end. This happened several years ago when my ex and I were going hrough a heated divorce/custody battle. While we were married, we had a couple of conversations about how rich people hide their assets to avoid paying taxes. I've never had enough assets to do this, but she somehow got the idea that I was and told her attorney that I was laundering money and hiding income. It was more likely the hea
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    down to. I couldn't even afford my own attorney so I represented myself. Her lawyer wasn't a total al but he clearly was out to get me, and he talked down to me like I didn't deserve to breathe the same air. One day, I get a letter in the mail from him requesting an updated income declarations form and 3 years of financials. It had a long a list of things to include. I own a communications tech company that was in super startup phase back then. Money was already tight. I was trying to get this b
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    to explain my situation. He all but called me a liar and didn't believe I couldn't afford it. I was put off by that, and I said this was taking time away from business I needed to handle. To which he replied (and I'll never forget this), "Well, according to your income declarations, you're not that busy. What do you do all day?" He then said if he didn't get these documents, he would consider my previous filings as fraudulent tell the judge, contact the DA, and also alert the state tax agency an
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    Okay, motherf er. You want 3 years of financials? You got it. I scanned-to-PDF every receipt I could find. McDonald's receipt from 5 years ago? it, won't hurt to include it. CVS receipt? It's 3 miles long, perfect. They get the $1 off toothpaste coupons too. I downloaded every bank statement, credit card statement, purchase orders from vendors, and every invoice I sent to clients. I printed to PDF the entire 3 year accounting journal, monthly/quarterly/annual balance sheets, cash flow statements
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    I made a cover page black background with white lettering. Wherever I could, I included separator pages in all caps in the biggest, boldest font that would fit on the page in landscape: 20XX RECEIPTS, 20XX TAXES, etc. I merged everything into a single 150+ page compressed PDF and sent the document using my Efax system. Every hour or so, I received a status email saying the fax failed. Huh, that's weird. Well, they're getting this document. So I changed the system configuration to unlimited retri
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    Two days later, a lady from his office called and asked me to stop sending the fax. Their fax/scanner/printer/copier had been printing non-stop. It kept getting paper jams, kept running out of ink and they had to keep shutting it off and back on to print. I explained that her boss told me to send this by the deadline or else he would call the DA and IRS. Since I didn't want a call from the DA or the IRS, I would keep sending until I get a success confirmation. I suggested they just not print unt
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    She put me on hold, and the attorney gets on the line. He said forget sending the financials. I said that I would need this in writing, so I will keep sending the fax until he sent that to me. He asked me to stop faxing and he would send it in writing, and I said send it in writing first and then I'll stop. Long moment of silence... click. About 20 minutes later, I received an email from his assistant with an attached, signed letter in PDF that I no longer needed to provide financials. The lette
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    TLDR; ex accuses me of hiding income and money laundering, her divorce lawyer demands 3 years of financials, I spam fax them with my company's Efax service.
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    CoderJoe1 ✪ The fax, the whole fax and nothing but the fax. 16.2k +3 2 & 73 More MonkeyChoker80 +1 33 & 71 More Reply Share You want the fax? You can't handle the fax!
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    shinin_Gold 33 Now that they opted out of faxes, maybe a singing telegram? 2.1k Reply Share FederalAnt9 OP. Why didn't I think of that back then? Wish I could upvote this twice!
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    Costalot2lookcheap. This made me laugh out loud. I especially love the black ink, white text, and extreme separator pages. Well done!
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    Reddit_Gunboat I used to be a divorce lawyer many years ago. Hysterical story. I love it. 1.3k Reply Share FederalAnt9 OP. Every lawyer I've encountered so far has had a great sense of humor. Even this guy in the story as much as a dito me as he was at times. Glad you enjoyed.
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    DenyNow BragLater. The letter then threatened to pursue sanctions in court or sue me for interfering with their business For doing exactly what he asked? How is that possible? 352 Reply Share FederalAnt9 OP. I guess it was bulls because it never came up again. I remember the threats being a long paragraph with a lot of legalese.
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    JanuarySoCold +2. Did he charge your ex for all the time his office spend dealing with all this documentation? 99 Reply Share FederalAnt9 OP. I managed to retain a lawyer later to change custody, and he charged me for everything. So yeah, I'm sure he did.
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    Wthobart Very compliant, pretty malicious, this is amazing 357 Reply Share FederalAnt9 OP. My girlfriend tells me I'm annoyingly literal. I just work with what I got.
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    Co drdrillaz My ex and i had a nasty battle too. Years later she tried suing me for something unrelated so I decided to sue for a modification of child support. She thought i was hiding assets too. I was paying $2000 per month for 1 kid. Wanted it reduced to $1500. So $6k per year with 7 years left til she's 18. $42k overall. Her attorney requested every financial document from all my personal and business over 3 years. And i mean everything. They hired a forensic accountant. The attorney was $5
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    weeks going over everything. Their accountant couldn't find anything. She spent $80k in legal fees and i ended up getting what i asked for. My attorney was about $10k so i made out on the deal. 362 Reply Share FederalAnt9 OP. When I told the attorney I hired later this story, he said this is exactly where they were going to take me. What probably saved me he said was what I sent showed him how obviously broke I was.
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    GleamLaw As a lawyer: AWESOME! Also, as a lawyer, I do not condone nor encourage this type of behavior. 86 Reply Share FederalAnt9 OP. How did you manage to land on both sides of this you f ting oratory magician?
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    iaincaradoc Evil. I love it. I don't even know how many fax machines in legal offices I got paid to fix in the late 80s into the mid 90s.
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    banansplaining Sounds like you outlawyered the lawyer. Beautiful. Just beautiful.

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