Teachers Recall Some of the Strangest Things Students Have Said to Them Throughout the Years: "Paper is basically the meat of the tree!"

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    01 . Brunette_rapunzel7 · 10 hr. ago Kid told me last year another one of my students asked his teacher if her foster kids were "rentals". I just stared because I couldn't believe it
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    Things my kids have said this year.
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    To preface this I am the math teacher at a very small alt school program that helps kids that have been too lazy/a ous/s ed to have freshman level credits as juniors and seniors. Small as in 4 teachers and less than 50 kids. We help kids get setup with trades and other local job connections. Our old kids pop in to say hi regularly. Everyone knows everyone and dumb things are said. I rush to write them on the edge of my whiteboard. So before I erase everything for the year, here are some prominen
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    I rode in a helicopter once That's what you call science! You're like a math witch. Craft... Master So like, you just know how to do all this math? This is Zach time! (Not said by Zach) Did I time travel while I was crying? I used to get Alaska and Nebraska mixed up.
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    I've seen a horse before. I'm looking at these numbers and all I see is numbers. Kid 1-it ain't chocolate. It's some weird waxy thing. Kid 2-You just ate the wrapper didn't you? Have you ever eaten a m to the Business teacher talk? om bar and just listened I fell asleep in the drive thru last night and they yelled at me.
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    ignaciohazard 22 hr. ago. 8th grader - when I was little I went to church and got fully watered. Me: Baptized?
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    13Luthien4077 · 18 hr. ago Not this year, but a classic: Kid 1: I'm going to join the Marines. They know how to treat you right there. Nobody ever yells at you. Kid 2: Y'know, I knew you weren't the sharpest tool in the shed, but I didn't realize you were a fr king cotton ball.
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    Phytor 20 hr. ago • Teaching a programming class and a young student is working on a Minecraft mod "Teacher, what language is minecraft made in?" "Minecraft is made in Java!" "that's dumb, why didn't they write it in English?"
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    Bright_Broccoli1844 23 hr. ago • While teaching high school, "Why aren't you doing the assignment?" "Were you short when you were little?"
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    InevitableYogurt7495 16 hr. ago High School Geometry Student: Miss, do you still get your period? Me: That's not a question to ask your math teacher. Student: ... because my grandma keeps pads and tampons in the bathroom but I don't think she gets her period anymore. Me: Maybe they are for you?
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    Student: Oh yeah, maybe! Me: Can we please do our work now? I'm only 38. I really hope she doesn't think I'm the same age as her grandma!
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    giant_spleen_eater 18 hr. ago Here are my favorites so far. The year isn't over so there's still time for more. 1. I can't wait until I grow up and work in a sweatshop! 2. I caught you lacking this weekend Mr. Spleen. Do better. (I still have no ideal what this kid is talking about and he refuses to elaborate)
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    3. My dad said I should of just been a massage 4. My mom said I don't have to listen to the white man anymore. And the last one isn't a thing they said but more of an interaction. "I got so many b y pics on my phone from my b es"
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    I chimed in and told him “didn't I have to walk you downstairs earlier today cause you said you're afraid of the basement? Bet those girls would love to know that”
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    • Keasbyjones 20 hr. ago A pigeon is a type of bird, right? 17 year old, very able student
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    mookey72 11 hr. ago Walking down the hall, small kiddo straggling behind. Me: "Let's pick up the pace, kiddo!" Kiddo: Looks around on the floor, looks at me, then says to me, "I don't know what a pace looks like."
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    Goblinboogers 21 hr. ago Wow, your eyebrows move alot when you talk
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    tatersaur27 18 hr. ago I teach science. One student was asking me if dogs' licking faces can cause breakouts. Before I even had a chance to respond, another kid said "dogs can't lick you through puberty." So that's a thing that was said this year.
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    Martin Van-Nostrand 17 hr. ago • "Sorry about my homework I was eating a hotdog and it had too much mustard on it" as he hands me his mustard colored paper.
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    beammeupbatman 13 hr. ago D d silence while everyone is writing. And then: "Miss, I believe I've learned to tap dance by watching Happy Feet. He knew what he was doing." And then just returned to his writing.
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    Averagedogguy . 13 hr. ago "Where does the sun go at night?" = question from a SENIOR in astronomy class
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    the_alt_fright • 16 hr. ago "Did you know that you don't need to wash your legs when you shower? Because of gravity."
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    feedfromthebottom88 12 hr. ago 1st period algebra during warm-up “I wish I was a horse"
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    Brunette_rapunzel7 · 10 hr. ago Kid told me last year another one of my students asked his teacher if her foster kids were "rentals". I just stared because I couldn't believe it
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    Sionna89. 2 hr. ago "Ergh, Miss what's wrong with the water, it's salty?"... said by a sixth grader on a snorkeling excursion, in the ocean.
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    TM_Spacefriend · 2 hr. ago Paper is just tree meat -- a seventh grader

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