‘You do nothing anyway’: Woman Expects Her Sister, a Stay-at-home Mom, To Watch Her 3 Children, Claiming It’s Not a Real Job Anyway

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
May 31, 2024 12:00 PM EDT

Welcome back women of the world. It's a timeless narrative that being a mom isn't a real job. Regardless of if someone is both a parent and works, being a parent in and of itself is more than most 9-5 jobs. One obvious difference is that it's a constant performance, it's not something you can clock in and out of. Even if someone else is watching your child for you, you're probably glued to your phone anyway because you want to be available if something happens. The work and care involved are nothing in comparison to most jobs. 

Not only is the parent slaving away, but having the world doubt your credibility and efforts is even more of an offense. It's not easy to go about everyday knowing how much you do, how tired you are, and that you're being gaslit into thinking you do nothing at all. Let's see how this story unfolds, and what the internet has to say about it. 

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  • 01
    r/AITAH ⚫ 8 hr. ago Dynamic_Destroyer AITA for Refusing to Babysit My Sister's Kids for Free Because She Said Stay-at-Home Moms Don't Work?
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  • 02
    I (30F) am a stay-at-home mom to two young kids. My sister (28F) has three children and works a full-time job. Recently, she asked if I could babysit her kids every day after school until she gets off work.
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  • 03
    I told her I'd be happy to help but that I'd need some compensation since it would be a significant addition to my daily responsibilities. She exploded, saying that since I "don't work" and "just stay home all day," I shouldn't need to be paid for it.
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  • 04
    I was floored by her comment. Staying at home with two kids is a full-time job in itself, and adding three more kids to the mix is no small task. I tried to explain this to her, but she accused me of being selfish and not supporting family.
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  • 05
    Our parents have taken her side, saying I should be more accommodating because she's working hard to support her family. Now, I'm being painted as the villain for expecting some form of compensation for the extra work.
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  • 06
    AITA for refusing to babysit my sister's kids for free because she doesn't see my role as a stay-at- home mom as real work?
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  • 07
    finding another stay at home parent to look after her children and see how that goes for her.
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  • 08
    The_Ghost_Reborn • 7h ago She exploded, saying that since I "don't work" and "just stay home all day," I shouldn't need to be paid for it. "Ok, well, the answer is no then. Find someone else.".
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  • 09
    If celticmusebooks • 7h ago your parents are "on her side" then they can step up and babysit for her. PROBLEM SOLVED. NTA
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  • 10
    • Ginger3950 8h ago NTA Holy , your parents and sister are though. Tell your parents that you too are working hard to support your family. If your sister doesn't see your staying home with your children as a job then tell her she should have no problem finding another stay at home parent
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  • 11
    PolygonMan • 7h ago "Oh, taking care of kids isn't working and doesn't deserve to be compensated? Well I don't see why you're asking me then, if it's such a small thing there are tons of people you could ask! Just go into your kid's class and start talking with the
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  • 12
    mothers there, I'm sure one of them would watch your kids for free! Don't act like you can ONLY get me to do this zero-work task for free, what a silly suggestion."
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  • 13
    OctoWings13 .7h ago NTA Uh oh...she asked for a favor, then followed up by insulting you? Lmao If you insult the person you're asking for help, you're gonna have a bad time
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  • 14
    ...then she doubled down on her insult, and it remains like that currently Parents are also massive for supporting her absolutely abhorrent behavior and entitlement
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  • 15
    Either flatly refuse at this point...or demand an apology, personal and again in front of your parents for all of the insults and double downs and whining to parents and entitlement etc...then also she needs to admit how hard it is being a stay at home parent. In
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  • 16
    admit how hard it is being a stay at home parent. In detail, not just a sentence. A well worded essay might be in order and presented to the family...and finally compensation
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  • 17
    ...and if she steps out of line ever, for just a second, cut it off completely
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  • 18
    PhaedronGDR • 7h ago NTA, if she isn't willing to recognize the value of SAHMS then she isn't entitled to your babysitting services.
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  • 19
    Used Mark_7911 6h ago NTA and based on her reaction you shouldn't do it even if she agreed to pay. She would never fully appreciate and recognize your help, and TBH she'd likely default on paying you.
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  • 20
    She can sign up for after school care programs in her neighborhood and pay for them. Or your mother can babysit for her.
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  • 21
    Several Leather_9... 7h ago Um..... if it isn't "work" why are daycares/ after school programs so expensive? You're more than doubling your work load, and the expense of 3 hungry children every day isn't cheap either. If she's not willing to help out, then she
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  • 22
    can find this non-work for free elsewhere. NTA
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