‘You are my only hope’: Man gets big bonus from his job, only for financially reckless brother to demand he use money to buy him a house

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Jun 1, 2024 5:00 PM EDT

It is a shame that no one teaches us how to be financially responsible when we become adults. This might be one of the most important lessons one has to learn while they are young, and yet none of us seems to have any clue what we are doing when it comes to handling money. 

That inability is often what leads people to have financial problems, which can later cause even more problems and strains, especially when it comes to family. The man in this Reddit story is one to tell. After years of living his life in lavish and luxurious ways, he suddenly found himself with no money and no where to live. He then turned to his brother, who had just got a big bonus from work, and simply asked him to use the money to buy him a house. Shocked, the brother is left trying to understand what he should do to help his struggling yet irresponsible sibling.

Scroll down to read the full story. After you are done, click here for a funny collection of Friends memes. 

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  • 01
    My brother is broke and wants me to buy him a house
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 02
    My brother is a lot older than me and in the last 20 years has lived in a fully owned 4 bedroom house, then after divorce, several different huge rented houses. Multiple foreign holidays per year,
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 03
    driving audi/merc grade cars. He owned his own business and seemed to be doing really well. I can honestly say I didn't have a shred of jealousy, envy, resentment while I lived in small 2 and 3 bed houses in a poor area.
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 04
    Maybe camping, or a very cheap holiday once per year. We saved up for two years to go to Greece one time. I was happy with what I had - which I want to be super clear was a perfectly normal standard of living with my family and own children.
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 05
    I was pleased for him when he told me about where he was going on holiday, went to visit him often in these houses and told him how great they were, super proud of him, looked up to him, all the rest that he was doing so well.
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 06
    Last week he told me he's massively in personal debt and business debt, and will be homeless in around 1 months time.
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 07
    This has happened at a very odd time. I landed an amazing job 6 years ago and through a combination of luck, years of hard work and intelligence was promoted to a very high level where I am now going to receive,
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 08
    for me, life changing quantities of RSUS (you can now probably figure out what I'm doing). I still live in a very small house, but my wife and I aspire to a place by the sea where we can walk the
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 09
    dog, and I have children to send to university and set up in their own lives in the current cost-of living crisis. He asked that I use the money I will be receiving to buy him a nice
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 10
    house, I would keep the ownership so it would be an investment for me and he would pay rent. Now we are at the off my chest part, there is NO WAY I am using this life changing money to
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 11
    continue a lifestyle for someone else that was far in excess of what I had, and at the cost of that kind of life for myself and my children. I told him I can pay rent on a flat for 3 months so he isn't homeless but I am not buying him a house to
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 12
    live in. I'm not investing in property and if I did there is no way I would rent to family, what a mess, would I evict him if he stopped pay rent?
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 13
    Maybe I feel guilty, maybe I need strangers on the internet to validate me, or tell me I'm wrong. I just need to get this off my chest and I can't really talk to my other family about it because that would mean disclosing my RSUs and then everyone would know I had money now.
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 14
    For me, I plan to keep my costs within my means, I know this job could go away at any point really, so I must save while I can.
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 15
    little_nel .23 hr. ago It's crazy that he even suggested you buy him a house! You've made a very generous offer to help him find a flat and pay rent.
    via u/little_nel
  • 16
    Shark_bait5 · 23 hr. ago Do not pay for anything, including his rent. Do not enable his behavior. He knew his situation and still chose to increase his debt over time with no plan to do anything about it, and now
    via u/Shark_bait5
  • 17
    the plan is for someone else to cover him. He needs to learn to live within his means. This. Is. Not. Your. Responsibility.
    via u/Shark_bait5
  • 18
    HorseStaple Battery00 OP. 22 hr. ago Thanks I needed to hear that. I made the offer so I won't go back on it but that's it.
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 19
    Ascholay 21 hr. ago Make sure you stick to your 3 month limit. Write it in a contract if you need it. If you can, make sure this hypothetical flat is in an area he should be able to afford. No high rises or penthouses. He's going to ask for 3 more months then 3 more...
    via u/Ascholay
  • 20
    Ancient-Awareness115. 21 hr. ago And make sure that your name isn't on a lease or anything OP
    via u/Ancient-Awareness115
  • 21
    twilight_songs · 21 hr. ago But pay the landlord directly, not your brother.
    via u/twilight_songs
  • 22
    starchy2ber · 22 hr. ago Why does it matter to him who owns the house (you or an anonymous landlord)? Seems he plans to be a bad tenant and wants to "rent" from someone he can manipulate. Your brother is sketchy and doesn't care about the financial health of your family don't go down this road.
    via u/starchy2ber
  • 23
    TaylorMade2566 · 23 hr. ago Honestly, I don't think you should get involved in paying rent on a flat for him unless that flat is in HIS name. If you want to give him some money consider it a gift, not a loan but under no circumstances put yourself in debt to help him. Your brother got himself into his situation by overspending for years, he isn't going to change now.
    via u/TaylorMade2566
  • 24
    HorseStapleBattery00 OP. 22 hr. ago Yes it would be a gift and only in his name. You're right, the root issue seems highly unlikely to change so I can't get myself on the hook to enable it.
    via u/HorseStapleBattery00
  • 25
    No_Fee_161.22 hr. ago You shouldn't sacrifice your family's future for your brother's excess. You're not responsible for him. He's a grown adult who lived lavishly most of his life. It's not your fault he's in debt.
    via u/No_Fee_161
  • 26
    Your family deserves a nice home. Your kids deserve to be sent to a university. Why should you sacrifice these things especially after you've worked hard for them?
    via u/No_Fee_161

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Tags

family drama drama brother house siblings finance reddit story parenting petty entitled family Reddit weird money brothers entitled people
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