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20 Different Kinds Of Shoes And What They Say About You

One retail employee, who goes by the username Ghostify on Imgur, was recently bored at work and decided to draft up a handy guide on what 20 different types of shoes say about those who wear them. He is Probably right...

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  • 1
    Footwear - Krista, 52. Wild hair, has sunflower ankle tattoo. Cool mom. Likes gardening, advocates for recreational marijuana Q40103 CLEMONS BLACK BA ww
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  • 2
    Footwear - Lauren, 29. Runs a small business selling "local, handmade" products sourced from Argentina. Is always too cheerful and secretly morbidly alcoholic
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  • 3
    Shoe - ADDES Www ADDEN.COM www.sTEVEMADDEN AR months that "You just have to try!" Has a C-section scar and does Pilates on Veronica, 32. Is on a new diet every six Wednesdays. Only wears sports bras.
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  • 4
    Shoe - Charles, 24. Works at dad's law firm, drives a Prius, went to Duke. Likes cocaine and a finger up the butt. SALE NUNN
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  • 5
    Footwear - Simeon, 26. Tall, dark, writes moody poetry, has more sex than you. Wears scarves. Has emotional connection to a band he "discovered"
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  • 6
    Footwear - MOOA Crystal, 49. Has short spiky hair, dog named Fluffy, and multiple plastic surgeries. Wears oversized sunglasses and likes her steak well done a small 9M
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  • 7
    Footwear - wwwsss Cameron, 21. Frat but chill, long hair, hooks up his dudes with that dank. Has trust fund and a boat but doesn't talk about it. Likes baggy shirts, lowkey OA 10 1/2 addicted to xans.
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  • 8
    Footwear - ANOIA crocs Chance, 17. Big boned, bit of a bully, wears cutoff shirts. Loves his four wheeler, wants a Dodge Ram duallie. Acroc
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  • 9
    Footwear - Kristynne, 19. Skinny and lethargic. Likes boy bands and tacos. Tried whisky once, threw up. Calls her father Daddy 18
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  • 10
    Footwear - Patricia, 53. Settled into comfort over style at her 9-5 filing job. Is just waiting for her retirement to roll around. Has been married since '72 to an overweight bank teller she secretly loathes
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  • 11
    Footwear - BRA Carol, 60. Calls you sweetheart, always sends you home with leftovers. Volunteers at book drives. Cooks a mean casserole. Loves Jesus and her three sons. CLEARANCE
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  • 12
    Footwear - Sylvia, 8. Curious yet disgusted by boys. Likes monster high dolls and DDR. Secretly wants a pony even though she knows mom and dad can't afford it
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  • 13
    Footwear - John, 58. Likes fishing and treasures his wife. Tells "pull my finger" jokes and lets the grandkids have ice cream when grandma goes to bed. APS HEMLOCK BRN/TAN/DK 96-325
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  • 14
    Shoe - 11 Brendon, 33. Ex-marine, runs 5 miles before breakfast, still wears it high and tight. Drinks his coffee black; has a firm handshake.
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  • 15
    Footwear - Dausere Sarah, 27. Always has dark circles under her eyes. Has a kid in another state she's saving up to care for. Waitress at Hooters. Likes Virginia slims, spends all her money on mid. LOS ANGELES ALIFORNIA CALFC
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  • 16
    Footwear - Samantha, 20. In college theatre to "express herself." Makes the poor sod trailing after her carry her shoes after she's had too many vodka cranberries STEVE MAD STEN
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  • 17
    Footwear - Katherine, 39: businesswoman by day, dominatrix after hours. Likes sashimi and expensive wines
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  • 18
    Footwear - SPE SPERRY Carter, 45. Cool dadTM. Perpetually tan, spends summers at the lake house with the kids, treats his golden retriever like family. Likes a good IPA, has his eye on a little red Porsche convertible.
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  • 19
    Footwear - Jewel, 37. Stay-at-home mother, although her kids are all moved out. Likes photo albums of her grandkids and marlboro menthols. Thinks olive garden is fine dining.
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  • 20
    Footwear - Brad, 23. Degree in business, 2.7 GPA. Lives for beer pong and "the chicks." Compares girlfriends to his exes, still pops his collar. G41% $25 825
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