‘It’s a man-free wedding’: Friend Refuses to Attend a Women Only Wedding, Sparking Controversy About Gender Rights

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    r/AITAH • 2 days ago CampaignCareless9666 AITAH for refusing to attend my friend's "man- free" wedding?
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    English is not my first language, apologies for any mistakes.
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    My (30F) friend "Lisa" (34F) is marrying her fiancée "Sophie" (35F) in two months. I've known both of them for several years and I am (or at least was until this whole debacle) quite close with Lisa so I was not surprised that they've invited me to the wedding. However, on the invitation it was noted that it's a "man-free" event, meaning that
  • 04
    no men are allowed to be there. Despite not being a man myself, I felt that it was a weird decision on their part. I'm also on good terms with Lisa's brother (28M), so I texted him to ask if he knows what's up with that whole thing and if at least brides' families are exceptions to the no men rule.
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    Apparently both him and his and Lisa's father are not invited (he doesn't know about Sophie's family but assumes it's the same with them) and he has no idea what prompted the rule, he says that at present it has (imo understandably) turned into a whole family dispute.
  • 06
    I think I wouldn't have gone anyway because not allowing the presence of any men at all just feels weird to me, but especially in light of the information I got from Lisa's brother I called her to say that I will be unfortunately unable to attend. She asked me why and I tried to make up a good excuse, but I'm a liar
  • 07
    so after she pressed me for a reason I told her the truth - that I think the no men rule is weird and I don't want to be involved in that. I did not tell her that I contacted her brother, just that I'm not a fan of events segregated by gender.
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    Lisa has told me that I'm not being a good friend to her because I'm not supportive of her an Sophie wanting their wedding to be fully centered on women. I told her that it would be centered on women anyway, considering that both of the people getting married are women. She hung up and I have not heard from her
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    since, but Sophie has been sending messages saying I have internalized misogyny. I personally think I behaved. reasonably, but Lisa and Sophie evidently disagree, so am I the in this situation?
  • 10
    Hi_Im_Dadbot • 2d ago NTA. That's really cringe and you're correct not to be supporting something like that.
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    SlightMammoth1... • 2d ago NTA. "I think the no men rule is weird and I don't want to be involved in that"
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    That is a statement in which you are the subject, not men. You don't want to go because you're uncomfortable. Simple as that. She's accusing you of misogyny instead of accepting your own (feminine) decision.
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    IndividualDevice9... • 2d ago NTA, if it's a hill she wants to die on the friendship isn't worth trying to save.
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    vibrant algorithms • 2d ago Haha yeah, NTA. I am IMO a hard core feminist, and to me that means advocating for equality amongst genders, not try to put men down to push women up... that's a horrible idea.
  • 15
    This reminds me of a book series that I (and everyone that has read it) loves. Perhaps you'll know the one I speak of, but the young teenage Dragon Queen liberates all the slaves in a city, and is horror struck when later, the previous slaves enslave the previous Masters. The wheel, huh?
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    True feminism means not trying to put one gender down for another, celebrating all of us as humans and everything that makes us unique, of which gender is a small thing (but one to be celebrated no matter what the gender), and should not be considered much, if at all
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    when considering the summation of a person. These friends are going the wrong way to put it bluntly, and it's just going to create turmoil obviously, and pit gender against gender, which is so messed up. All genders are meant to live
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    together in peace without putting each other down, same as all races, IMO. It's sad that some women think feminism means putting down men...
  • 19
    Equivalent-Bee-886 • 2d ago NTA. I am a heterosexual male and have been married to my wife for 34 years. We have a diversity of friends and coworkers. I would not attend a male only wedding and my wife would not attend a female only wedding. There has to be
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    mutual respect for everyone. It sounds like you friend is the one with an issue and not you.
  • 21
    PearlyP2020 • 2d ago Imagine being a father and then your daughter tells you you're not invited to her wedding because it's women only. NTA.

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