'I am looking for average performance': Boss claims employee is setting too high expectations for clients and demands she lowers her work performance, leading to employee's resignation

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Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Aug 1, 2024 7:00 AM EDT

Reddit is full of stories of overworked employees struggling to keep up with the workload their managers demand from them. And it is no strange subject to most employees, we all know how hard it is to live up to the expectations of bosses, clients, and customers, and it is almost impossible to do it without collapsing on the job.

What you don't read or hear a lot of, are stories about employees who are actually asked to work less, and lower their performance, like the employee in this Reddit story. On her job performance review, she was told by her boss that her performance was excellent, but that he actually wants her to aim for a more average performance. He claims she is making him look bad while setting too high expectations with their stakeholders. Not sure what to do about this request, the employee resorted to try and file for her resignation, which did not go well…

Scroll down to read the full story. Up next, click here for a story of a boss who rescinded a job offer after the candidate asked about their pay.

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  • 01
    JOB CE REVIEW "I am looking for average Employee Information oyee Name amber performance" ectives 2 to 4 Months Make certain defined gotate neces the goals you d our manager you spend yo 4 to 6 Months istic Review perfomanc your target Report
    via Canva
  • 02
    Rant - my boss sees my high performance as an issue
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 03
    Apologies, I am not a native speaker. I had my performance review yesterday and I was pretty annoyed after it.
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 04
    I am a Program/Project Manager, a young (early 30s) woman in an old men's field. You can imagine the massive overcompensation going on - I am that annoying colleague who'll spend their free time on
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 05
    studying and working, unfortunately due to being insecure - for being treated as "less". EDIT: I also focused a lot on building relationships, stakeholders management and
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 06
    reputation management - for both mine, and my teams' and my projects' reputation. Something I believe my boss never did, because I keep getting asked "who was your boss again, never heard of
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 07
    him", "which team do you report into ... ah never heard about that department ". The feedback I got from my boss on my performance review this week-
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  • 08
    1. Nothing bad to say, you exceed all expectations, you receive great feedback from everyone you work with, your documentation and KPIs are always on track. Stakeholders keep asking having you on projects.
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  • 09
    2. But as much as that's good for you, it is bad for me, you set the wrong (high) expectation with stakeholders and that goes against my principle that all PMS should be interchangeable. I am looking for average performance.
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  • 10
    3. I understand that you want to do Program management (and xyz), but I want you to be available for new projects when they come, as you are my only PM in this region
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  • 11
    4. * Here I need to provide context - my team/organisation is politically weak*- so I struggled with inter-department issues for 18 months; my boss would not get involved when I escalate and just pay lip service. Being
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 12
    younger, I was treated by people as a secretary and being interrupted and undermined, which led me to starting therapy. At some point I submitted my resignation letter, to which my boss responded with - "you have no real issues,
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 13
    you quit over nothing" - but 3 Director level stakeholders got in touch and told me "they wanted me to stay and they have my back in case of any issues". What they did, changed completely my feelings about work and their support solved my problems. *
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 14
    Anyway, back to point 4) from my performance review - "You can no longer play the quitting card, so if you have new issues, you need to solve them differently " + "imagine your engineers start quitting over
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 15
    nothing or tell you they don't want to work with you anymore, you need to focus on avoiding that" According to the senior stakeholders who support me, I am an "asset" & they decide what
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 16
    projects I get involved in - they keep me for the "strategic ones" and they want me to enjoy my work. According to my boss - I am a bit of an issue, he believes he controls
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  • 17
    what projects I get and he wants me to do only what aligns with his vision (which, tbh, is disconnected with the business goals we have). I am just a bit annoyed, because I have put so much effort - I want to do the career thing while I'm young and I want to be treated as an equal.
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  • 18
    I completely get his point of view, I am grateful for the support of the rest of the organisation, but sometimes I can't get over the fact that I have to report to him. Him not helping me with my issues and not supporting me in doing better is massively demotivating.
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 19
    No-Entertainer-1358 4 days ago Your boss is the problem. You have to do the very risky game of going over his head to the stakeholders who love you. Big risk=Big Reward- your boss is gone-or maybe you are. You must take control no matter the outcome
    via u/No-Entertainer-1358
  • 20
    • Ok-Current-9594 OP 4 days ago Thank you, that's where I am at with it I think. I can get a job easily if I lose this one, but I fell in love with the industry and the company, so i genuinely start my working day with "hey how do we bring more success here"
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 21
    FRELNCER. 4 days ago Try requesting a transfer via the stakeholders. If they don't back you up, move on.* *If they don't back you up, they either don't have the power they implied or were just saying what you wanted to hear to keep you complacent. Time to fall out of love with the company if that is the reality.
    via u/FRELNCER
  • 22
    Ok-Current-9594 OP 4 days ago One of them suggested that they bring me in their part of the organisation, but they dont typically have my role there, so it will require some gymnastics. I also need access to my
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 23
    organisation's resources in order to stay useful. I would give it a few months as I don't have an open conflict with my boss, he doesn't stop me from doing. what I have to do, but some days I can't quite get over the fact that when I had no support and had issues he didn't do anything about it.
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 24
    But you're right, at some point I need to be realistic about it and remove myself from a situation where I am not seen as "useful".
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 25
    FRELNCER 4 days ago • When you align with a skip level, you sometimes have to sacrifice alignment with your direct supervisor. When that happens, your fate lies solely in the hands of the upper manager who may or may not be willing to spend their political points to protect you indefinitely.
    via u/FRELNCER
  • 26
    Do you have to remain working with this boss? You could ask to transfer to another if you want to stay in the organization. It seems like your boss has made it clear that they see you as an obstacle to
    via u/FRELNCER
  • 27
    their maintaining their happy little kingdom. I think you may need to choose whether to push your own agenda or back down and follow their directions (to remain mediocre).
    via u/FRELNCER
  • 28
    • Ok-Current-9594 OP 4 days ago Thank you for that! I would probably have to do what I am doing for another few months - to a year and then take a view on what are my options in the organisation and outside of it.
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 29
    I feel much more fulfilled from the work I do since I am aligned with the skip-levels - since now I get support and some coaching. Unfortunately my role is only available in our department, however the company looks
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  • 30
    flexible and if I build up a bit more value, I hope to be able to negotiate a transfer that would let me keep at least part of my current responsibilities. And at some point, if it doesn't work out, I'll be happy to leave, knowing I tried everything.
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 31
    stevenmacarthur - 4 days ago "I am looking for average performance." When your supervisor tells you this, it is the reddest of red flags; start making plans to leave yesterday.
    via u/stevenmacarthur
  • 32
    Ok-Current-9594 OP 4 days ago He wants to manage a service - so I see where he is coming from. You don't want variance. But even in engineering, people are all different - they all have a different mix of skills and a different personality - you can
    via u/Ok-Current-9594
  • 33
    provide them the same framework and training, and then watch them execute in a different style. So that's how I see our job too (PM-ing). But he did flat out told me that, and it made me question my efforts and enthusiasm.
    via u/Ok-Current-9594

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boss workplace-stories employee manager job tales-from-the-workplace reddit story performance overworked-employees workplace Reddit company funny resignation
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