30 Parenting Memes Celebrating the Beginning Of The School Year

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  • 01
    average joe @jazz_inmypants there are children being born whose PARENTS were not alive when Shrek (2001) came out.. Crazy how the years start coming and they simply do not stop coming
  • 02
    The 21st Century SAHM @21stcenturysahm Having multiple kids is weird. You have one kid you could trust to be home alone for a whole weekend & you know they'd eat vegetables, lock the doors, & wash the dishes. Then you have another kid who is not allowed to hold an umbrella. And they're almost the same age.
  • 03
    Toddlers when you mention going outside A O
  • 04
    BWO @isabellayonce My 5 year old son just asked me how I know his name... I'm not in the mood today
  • 05
    THE DAD The Dad → @thedad There should be a cooking show for parents. The contestants start by working a full 8-hour day and then have 20 minutes to slap together a somewhat-decent meal that the 8-year-old judges call "trash" because it's not chicken nuggets.
  • 06
    Me at meet the teacher night for my kindergartner @dad.wilder
  • 07
    Me: I'm going to update some of the pictures in these frames. Me, 30 minutes later: sobbing in a pile of old photos that I've found hidden behind other photos in the frame because time goes too fast and my babies aren't babies anymore. @mommywinetime
  • 08
    Friend: "Oh, your kid is 4? Mine was reading at 4." Me: "Cool. Mine knows every word to 'Baby Got Back."" RAMBLIN' MAMA
  • 09
    Katie Chironis @kchironis was trying to get my 2yo to nap on vacation, so i offered her a cheddar square to nibble on and said "let's lie down on our cot and read a book in the nice quiet darkness together." since then she has been asking to "eat cheese in the darkness"
  • 10
    MOM The Mom at LawⓇ ... AT LAW @TheMomAtLaw Me: I have 3 small kids, so preparing a healthy breakfast can be a challenge some mornings. Friend: You should meal prep at night to make things easier. Me: I guess I should have mentioned that the kids live here at night, too.
  • 11
    That's Not Mustard @thatsnotmustard First grade is wild. You're learning how to be a human, how to write things down, how to manage friendships and follow rules, and all the while everybody's teeth are falling out all over the place.
  • 12
    Cydni Beer @cydbeer Husband: If anyone else whines they have to go right to bed! Me: Ugh my pants are too tight. My feet are cold. Everyone is being too loud. Kids: Ha! Mom has to go to bed! Me: Goodnight, suckers.
  • 13
    I may not be ready... But I know they are. @mommywinetime
  • 14
    When you go back and look at what you've spent on daycare over the years @cynicalparent Cynical Parent
  • 15
    Annie Way @Anniewritess You might think the important childhood milestones are walking and talking, but they're actually things like "can be left alone for 5 minutes," "can fetch their own snack," and "can puke in a receptacle instead of all over their bed."
  • 16
    Me wondering where I'm going to find energy for the dinner, bath, and bedtime routine when I've been ready for bed since noon. @oneawkwardmom
  • 17
    Krister Johnson WRITERS GUILD ON STRIKE @KristerJohnson My 11 y.o. son just discovered Tetris. Came home to him boasting about scoring 15,000 points. Cracked my knuckles and played for the first time in 25 years. Dropped 73,000 points on his head. Now he's angrily muttering to himself and I'm doing karate kicks on the front porch.
  • 18
    Barista: Four shots of espresso? That's a lot. Me: So is motherhood. @themarvelousmrsmom
  • 19
    Old enough to be a mom... not old enough to not need my mom. @mommywinetime
  • 20
    redyellowgreendance @RYGdance Me at 4:05pm: "How was camp?" Him, 7: "Sshh" Me at 6:05pm: "Tell me about camp today!" Him: "I don't wanna." Lights out, 9:05pm: Him: "Listen to what we did at camp today! It was camp olympics and we played volley-balloon-ball and I have a new friend Dylan and we had ices..."
  • 21
    People now: Life lately. 10 pic update of the last 3 months. *stories saw it first* Me, in 2006: Here are 114 photos from last night. I'll post again at this time tomorrow. @mommywinetime
  • 22
    @dad_hard I wanted to drink beers poolside with the adults but we have this "family" rule that whoever has given birth the least number of times has to swim with the kids.
  • 23
    Actual footage of my toddler when she wouldn't let me brush her hair for 2 days: @stellaonmymind
  • 24
    the luckiest penny. @aSouthern Penny Follow My son proposed to his fiancée about six months ago and she said yes. They're super happy, we love her family too. I just found out today that another girl is in love with him and plans to propose next week.... should I say anything? Oh and also, he's 4. They're all 4.
  • 25
    Mommeh Thee Dearest @mommeh_dearest Did you know that fatigue usually starts at about the 6th week of pregnancy and lasts. until you die
  • 26
    sarah @sarahradz I asked my 8yo if he liked my sleeveless blouse, he said "the color's fine, but I don't like public armpits" Public. Armpits. It's going straight to Goodwill
  • 27
    Mommy Needs A Life @mom_needsalife *** That time my son brought home the award for sweetest camper and my heart swelled, but when I looked closer it said sweatiest. My son won the ✓ award for sweatiest camper.
  • 28
    Parents sending their kids to school after the long holiday break: Schitts Creek @mommywinetime SEEYA!
  • 29
    Capri @iCaprii Me watching my husband cook a bomb 4-course meal while I stand there with my spatchy-spatch ready to stir something
  • 30
    Sah Stay at Homies @stayathomies While putting together a tater tot casserole, my 7yo came across a half of a tot. I told her it was a baby tot and she corrected me by saying "it's a tottler". And dad's everywhere, stood up and applauded.

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