Woman Calls the Cops On Her Boyfriend After Mistaking Proposal Set Up for a Break In, His Embarassment Leads to Strain in Relationship

Author image for Ely Bulnes
Ely Bulnes • Writer and Editor
Sep 18, 2024 4:00 PM EDT

Welcome, gossipy gals. The internet would have you believing that proposing needs to be a whole production. We've all been bombarded on TikTok and Instagram with adorable and elaborate proposals that melt even the coldest of hearts. Some proposals take as much coordination as a flash mob, and others are just so deeply personal and emotional that one can't help but feel touched. It is equally as satisfying, though, to watch videos of proposals gone wrong. From cold rejections to some unfortunately-timed accident that causes the ring to go flying, the schadenfreude wrought from these videos is sometimes too great to handle by yourself, and you must send the clip to your partner with a text reading, "Please, don't propose like this!"

In our story today, our protagonist ruins her own proposal by misinterpreting the ominous set up by her boyfriend that was meant to lead to a romantic and special moment. Clearly, he didn't think it through very well, and on the other hand, she overthought the situation. Scroll down for all the details of this proposal gone wrong. 

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • 01
    r/relationship_advice u/ThrowRA-Broccoli • 17h Mistakenly called the cops on my 27F boyfriend 29M when he had planned a surprise proposal. Now things between us are strained. Am I able to fix this?
    via u/ThrowRA-Broccoli
  • 02
    We have been together for seven years. We moved in together after two weeks, adopted a dog and a couple of cats, opened a joint bank account, met each others families, merged our friends into one tribe. It has been seven really good years. I'm happy.
    via u/ThrowRA-Broccoli
  • 03
    I am not one of those people that need to be married. I don't need a ring, a ceremony, a piece of paper, to commit my life to the one person I love beyond all others. I am his wholly and completely. That isn't to say I'm against marriage, because I'm not. But getting a ring on my finger is not a priority for me.
    via u/ThrowRA-Broccoli
  • 04
    When I have thought about it I imagine a small wedding with our parents, maybe our siblings, and the officiant. Barefoot on the beach. No fuss, nothing elaborate, something simple that we could throw together ourselves. Then off to a place we could relax, eat and drink without the formalities. If I had a dream wedding, it would be that or something similar.
    via u/ThrowRA-Broccoli
  • 05
    Back in July my boyfriend was acting cagey. I knew he was up to something and trying to hide it. He is no good at trying to keep something under wraps. He's one of those people that, even though they don't say anything, act like they have a secret. I wasn't worried about his secret because I knew he would tell me eventually. I was thinking he was going to surprise me with a weekend getaway because I had been working long hours for a couple of months and that's the kind of thing he does.
    via u/ThrowRA-Broccoli
  • 06
    One night I arrived home from work and his car wasn't in the drive, the house was dark, and the front door wide open. I sat in the street watching the house for a couple of minutes. There was no movement, no lights in the windows, nothing. I called my boyfriend four times, no answer. That wasn't like him. One missed call? Sure. Four missed calls? No. So I called the cops.
    via u/ThrowRA-Broccoli
  • 07
    I was still on the phone with emergency services when they arrived. They came over to me, I gave them a run down on what I knew, which was nothing, and they went into the house. A few minutes later one of them came out and asked me to go in with them. They lead me through the house to the back patio. I had flipped the lights on as I entered and saw that a trail of rose petals took us right out the back. Where my boyfriend, wearing a tux and handcuffs, was sitting at our patio table that was set
    via u/ThrowRA-Broccoli
  • 08
    It goes without saying that the surprise proposal was ruined. It has been about seven weeks since. Things are not good between us. It was a simple misunderstanding on my part. My boyfriend thinks I called the cops. because I knew he was going to propose. He thinks that I don't want to marry him but instead of saying that, I found a way to make sure I wouldn't have to. We have discussed us getting married exactly once and that was in our first year of being together. I remember the conversation w
    via u/ThrowRA-Broccoli
  • 09
    Him - would you wear my ring? Me-yeah Him - when? Me surprise me -
    via u/ThrowRA-Broccoli
  • 10
    That was the extent of our discussion about marriage. I don't know how I was suppose to know he was going to ask five weeks ago from a half assed conversation from some six years ago.
    via u/ThrowRA-Broccoli
  • 11
    I know I hurt him and I've apologised for doing so. He refuses to see how it came about that I called the cops. He went to his parents that night because he was upset, then came home an hour later because they thought it was hilarious. Everyone he tells thinks it's funny. He is the one telling people. Before this post I had not said anything to anyone because I know it upsets him.
    via u/ThrowRA-Broccoli
  • 12
    I don't know what else to do. He doesn't believe me that it was a huge misunderstanding. Am I missing something? Did I break trust or harm him in some way that I'm just not getting? How do I approach this so I can fix it? At this point I'm thinking of proposing to him so we can move on from this. ✩ 3,594 1,611
    via u/ThrowRA-Broccoli
  • 13
    HatsAndTopcoats • 16h Why in the world did he leave the front door open? ... Reply 9.6k
    via u/HatsAndTopcoats
  • 14
    ThrowRA-Broccoli OP. 16h He thought I would see the rose petals when I approached. It didn't occur to him that I would find a dark house and the door wide open, worrying. ... 7.6k
    via u/ThrowRA-Broccoli
  • 15
    FlyFlirtyandFifty ⚫ 16h • Not to mention him not answering his phone! 5.9k
    via u/FlyFlirtyandFifty
  • 16
    tsqr9.13h All he had to do was answer and say "I'm in the backyard"...it's not like it would have ruined the surprise. 3.4k
    via u/tsqr9
  • 17
    amithecrazyone69 • 15h Honestly, I think it's a hilarious story and if I was the bf I would be laughing about it Reply 1.9k
    via u/amithecrazyone69
  • 18
    Thingisby • 8h He went to his parents that night because he was upset, then came home an hour later because they thought it was hilarious. Yeah it's objectively a hoot. He needs to reflect on why he still can't see the funny side numerous weeks later even when everyone around him thinks it's hilarious. 474
    via u/Thingisby
  • 19
    bearflies • 9h I think it's a funny story too but as the BF I'd personally feel really, really guilty and blame myself for ruining the proposal for my GF. Maybe I would be briefly for a day or a week, but the last thing I would suspect was that my girlfriend purposely called the cops knowing I was going to propose. An open door, lights off, and not. answering my phone are all things that are my fault. Especially if she called multiple times in a row, it could have been an emergency (and it techn
    via u/bearflies
  • 20
    OP did nothing wrong here, the BF didn't either initially, but seven weeks and he's still mad? There are several red flags here, to be honest. OP's bf needs some sense slapped into him. 364
    via u/bearflies
  • 21
    Trouble_in_Mind • 15h Ngl, I was kinda prepared to read something silly...but what the heck! Have you tried reversing the example? "What if you came home, it was dark out, the front door is wide open with seemingly nobody at home, and you couldn't get ahold of me? Wouldn't you be worried there was a home invasion? THAT is what I thought happened." The fact that he's so upset about this / blaming you is VERY weird. ... Reply 672
    via u/Trouble_in_Mind
  • 22
    Alhexu • 13h And "ambiguous red material" flowing from the front door into the house before flipping lights on (which you have to be inside to do) lol 131
    via u/Alhexu
  • 23
    avast2006. 15h Your boyfriend meant well, but "empty driveway, dark house, front door hanging wide open" means exactly what you thought when you saw it, to anyone with a shred of common sense and a drive towards self-preservation. He got it almost right, and then ruined it with the dumb front door. You would have been a fool to walk into that, and you did exactly right by involving the police.
    via u/avast2006
  • 24
    And now he is being unfair to you by refusing to acknowledge he did something spectacularly idiotic. At this point it has gone beyond dumb and has progressed to emotional abuse. You did nothing wrong. He hangs out on the idea that "everyone he tells thinks it's funny" without realizing that the reason it's funny is because he did something embarrassingly stupid, and he's the one who ended up in handcuffs at his own proposal because of it.
    via u/avast2006
  • 25
    My advice is to get a disinterested third party to yell some sense into him, because he's damaging his relationship with his pouting over something that is entirely his fault. Reply 1.9k
    via u/avast2006
  • 26
    ForestInTheSnow • 13h Another route if you can't get a disinterested third party, show him some of these replies. OP, I would have done the exact same thing in your position. Dark house, open door, no reply from phone calls, no car in the drive - with the context you had, it would have been dangerous to go inside incase an assailant was there and could cause you harm. He's letting his worries about your opinion of marriage cloud his reading of this scene. In the future, this would make a hilario
    via u/ForestInTheSnow
  • 27
    Reassure him that you calling the cops was based on worry for yourself, your home, and HIM. It was not based on feelings about a proposal you didn't know was happening. You're sorry his proposal didn't go to plan and, if he wants to try again, maybe keep the front door closed. Best of luck! Also, your dream wedding sounds like what I did for my wedding - registry office, immediate family, and a nice place to eat afterwards. It was absolutely the way to go, we had a blast! 111
    via u/ForestInTheSnow

Tags

boyfriend FAIL marriage proposal reddit story proposal relationships girlfriend couples epic fail love engagement reddit thread Reddit schadenfreude dating
Scroll Down For The Next Article