Disrespectful sister makes copious noise and invites friends over while her night-shift working sister is asleep while being a guest in her home: 'I told her she needs to find somewhere else to stay'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Oct 5, 2024 1:00 PM EDT

I cannot imagine how difficult it would be to work the night shift. When I first applied to jobs out of college, I thought it would be cool to work from 3 PM to 11 PM, go to the bar after work, and have a beautiful morning to myself every weekday. Now, I realize how difficult that life would be. You can't go to a happy hour, nor can you see a movie at seven on a Tuesday. Not to mention how screwed up your sleep schedule can get! If I had to work from 10 PM-8 AM, I would get pretty batty if I didn't make sleeping my 9-5 gig. The world doesn't revolve around night workers, but the people who live with them should consider their basic sleep needs before banging pots and pans together at 10 AM. Unfortunately, the kid sister in this story didn't take such considerations. 

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  • 01
    666
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    AITA for kicking my sister and her boyfriend out because they don't respect my sleep schedule?
    via u/stayhumble4721893
  • 03
    My (34/f) sister (27/f) and her boyfriend (28/m) moved in with me at the end of August after he was laid off from work (she doesn't make enough to pay rent on her own).
    via u/stayhumble4721893
  • 04
    The agreement was for them to stay at my apartment through the holidays so they could save up money and he could find a new job. All they'd have to contribute is $500 for rent and food. He has done his part and found a new job and they have been saving money for their move, which is part of the reason why I feel like I might be TA here.
    via u/stayhumble4721893
  • 05
    I work graveyard in a small group home for adults with intellectual and developmental disabilities. I cannot sleep at work because I'm the only one there and I have to be awake in case one of our residents needs me or there's an emergency. I spend my time at work cleaning, doing documentation, changing people's depends, making their meals for the next day, and giving a few of them their showers in the morning. Needless to say, I have to stay awake and alert the entire time I'm there.
    via u/stayhumble4721893
  • 06
    My sister has a difficult time understanding that I need my place to be reasonably quiet during the day so I can get my sleep. I could understand some normal amount of noise, but she took it over the top. Laughing obnoxiously loud; blasting her music or TV in the living room (right next to my bedroom); having loud guests over; being very loud in the bathroom and kitchen, etc.... I asked very nicely many times to please keep it down, and she always apologized and said okay. But then she started t
    via u/stayhumble4721893
  • 07
    I finally got upset and told her they're being allowed to stay with me as guests and if she can't act as such then they need to find somewhere else to stay. She spent the rest of the day calling all her friends and everyone in our family telling them how horrible I am for threatening to kick them out. Our parents reached out to me and asked if that was true. I told them the situation and they're on my side, but said I should give them the month to figure things out. I called and spoke with her b
    via u/stayhumble4721893
  • 08
    Now she's even more furious with me because I "went behind her back" and called him and "manipulated" him into being on my side. I told her look, I will give them until November 1st to figure something out, and he even said it probably wouldn't even be that long as they could go stay with his parents, but my sister is choosing to die on this hill and make me out to be the villain when all I wanted was some quiet so I could function at work.
    via u/stayhumble4721893
  • 09
    AITA for kicking them out? I do feel bad because her boyfriend is doing what he can and is being reasonable. I just don't understand why my sister can't comprehend that I can't sacrifice my sleep and put my livelihood at risk. Thoughts?
    via u/stayhumble4721893
  • 10
    lemon_charlie NTA. She is a guest in your home, she needs to respect you and not invite people over herself. The audacity in suggesting you stay with your boyfriend, effectively kicking you out of your own apartment, is staggering. Her calling you out on contacting people about this is her throwing stones in glasshouses because she did exactly that to slander you.
    via u/lemon_charlie
  • 11
    You need that rest because your job has you responsible for people who are unable to do things for themselves (that and sleep deprivation is dangerous). That trumps any of your sister's needs or wants in your home, or how her boyfriend is impacted. If you're on a lease, what are the rules around guests? Can you defer to that as a reason to kick out your sister?
    via u/lemon_charlie
  • 12
    maggietaz62 I work in the same industry and my husband is a shift worker as well. Your sister is an selfish, immature brat.
    via u/maggietaz62
  • 13
    False-Importance-741 As a guest you should have as small a footprint in another person's home as possible. When I've stayed with relatives I did everything possible to make it like I wasn't there. Entered and left quietly, washed ang dishes I used, replaced any food or drinks I consumed. If I watched TV or listened to music in my room I wore headphones. I interacted with the family played games, shared meals, and watched TV with them at times, but never had friends to their house, or did much wh
    via u/False-Importance-741
  • 14
    NTA - OPs sister obviously decided she had equity in sister's place and didn't have to act like a guest anymore. As evidenced by the headphone and go stay at your boyfriend's place comment. Having friends over when your host is trying to sleep is as bad as it gets guest wise.
    via u/False-Importance-741
  • 15
    Environmental_Art591 The audacity in suggesting you stay with your boyfriend, effectively kicking you out of your own apartment, is staggering. Or her plan to begin with, think about it, make OP so uncomfortable she goes to her boyfriends place then come the holidays and sis can say "why not just move in with your boyfriend, your practically living there anyway, and we can take over your lease so you don't even have to worry about breaking it or finding someone else to take it over."
    via u/Environmental_Art591
  • 16
    saintsgma Retired RN. At different points in my career, I worked overnights. The first time, I was young and living at home (with parents, four younger siblings). I just about lost my mind with constant requests (examples: did my GF call? Will you please listen for the Sears repairman? Do you know where Mom went?) I totally relate and your sister is annoying, and honestly-putting your wellbeing at risk. Being overtired causes accidents, poor performance and even poor health.
    via u/saintsgma
  • 17
    I had a meltdown at the dinner table that time (my dad was possibly the worst...) But they got it, finally. Since your sister has chosen to not understand (because honestly, it's not a difficult concept to grasp). I would suggest calls to her several times a night, turning on lights through a mobile app, perhaps the TV. The William Tell Overture blaring from Alexa about two hours after her normal bedtime... or my late mom's favorite Saturday call for wake-up (4 teenagers)― Mahalia Jackson singin
    via u/saintsgma
  • 18
    cassowary32 NTA. Isn't she working? When does she find the time to be so loud and obnoxious? Maybe she needs to find a second job so they can afford to move out quicker.
    via u/cassowary32
  • 19
    stayhumble4721893 OP She works part time at a grocery store. Her income was always supposed to be supplemental in their household because her boyfriend makes/made decent money as a construction worker
    via u/stayhumble4721893

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boyfriend family drama guests noises sisters siblings work night shift noise family day sibling sister night loud little sister Reddit apartment
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