'I woke up to over 50 texts': 22-year-old walks out of surprise party thrown by their family members after insisting they didn't want a celebration

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Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Nov 4, 2024 5:00 PM EST

The internet is totally divided: did this person handle their surprise party the right way, or were they totally out of line? 

It all depends who you ask, according to the commenters on this story from u/noparty4me88. As you can guess from their username, this person does not like parties for themself. They mention that they didn't ever have parties for their own birthdays, not even the major birthdays that often get large celebrations like their sweet 16 or their 21st. Some people just don't like all that attention. Instead of enjoying the party, they just get nervous that everyone is celebrating them, and find all that socializing to be way too much to handle. 

This person really insisted that they did not want a birthday party under any circumstances. But their family still threw them one! Commenters couldn't agree on how this person handled the situation, though, with some calling the original poster insensitive. Others thought that this person had every right to walk away from a party they so clearly communicated they didn't want. However, in the real world, this person's family will probably think they're in the wrong for fleeing their party. After all, the family members dedicated a day to celebrating this person, only to show up to a party with no host… Check out the full story below and see which side of the debate you end up on. 

After that, read about this bad neighbor who claimed he'd tattle to the city if his neighbor didn't get his collapsed fence fixed up. 

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    Cheezburger Image 10424347648
    via Kateryna Hliznitsova For Unsplash+

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    AITA for walking out of my own surprise party Hi so I turned 22 yesterday, and I've made it clear to my entire family that I didn't want a party, in fact I've never had a party, not for my 16th or 18th, or 21st I hate attention being on me.
    via u/noparty4me88
  • 03
    so on Saturday my dad told me he wanted to take me to my favorite bar and I thought that would be a decent compromise to wanting to be alone. however when we walked into the door, there was my entire family and friends all standing there and they already had me a drink
    via u/noparty4me88
  • 04
    poured. because I'd spent the last 6 months telling my familiy I did not want a party, I just turned around and walked right out the front door and straight back to my apartment (about a 15 minute walk) and I ordered chinese takeout and went to sleep. I woke up to over 50 texts from various family members telling me how
    via u/noparty4me88
  • 05
    ungrateful I was and how I made my parents cry, and I even got a text from one of my family members who had visited from overseas who I wasn't aware was at the party, I apologized to him for having a wasted journey and
    via u/noparty4me88
  • 06
    told him we could hangout one day after work if he wanted, and I resolved that issue. however the rest of my family now will not talk to me and my mom is demanding an apology. so AITA?
    via u/noparty4me88
  • 07
    Da... YTA I expect this will get downvoted because this sub is very much "you don't owe anyone sh". But the truth is in the real world if people throw you a party you're supposed to nod and smile and pretend to enjoy it. Because it makes them happy.
    via u/Daytripsinsidecars
  • 08
    And sure maybe it's not how you want to spend your birthday but making your whole family happy should be more important than how you spend your birthday. Edit: Thank you kind redditors for the awards. I realize many, many of you disagree. I'm afraid I'm
    via u/Daytripsinsidecars
  • 09
    going to stop replying to the comments as it's just getting exhausting. The lovely chaps who felt the need to message my inbox to tell me how much I - that was uncalled for perhaps - instead articulate your rationale in your own comment.
    via u/Daytripsinsidecars
  • 10
    Jaywearspants Yes. YTA obviously. Sure you're entitled to your privacy but the fact of the matter is everyone went out of their way for you and you spat in their faces. You're allowed to be an a h le just know that you are absolutely one.
    via u/Jaywearspants
  • 11
    Sophia F88 Personally, NTA. You said you didn't want a party. They know you, so they should know you weren't just saying that. Honestly this was so satisfying to read. Everyone completely ignores your wishes so instead of going "oh well, you trampled a
    via u/Sophia F88
  • 12
    boundary that I had clearly and repeatedly stated. Guess I'll just it up and fake having fun on MY OWN birthday" you just left.
    via u/Sophia F88
  • 13
    suedewnim YTA. The black and white world of reddit may disagree, but IRL, YTA. Sometimes you have to do things you don't like to do and there were MUCH better ways to handle that besides walking out and ignoring your family. Wow.
    via u/suedewnim
  • 14
    [deleted] NTA you said multiple times you didn't want a party, there's nothing special about 22 so why now. If you don't like being the center of attention then you shouldn't have to be
    via u/[deleted]
  • 15
    SugarGlitterkiss ESH except the poor people invited to your party who arranged their days and possible other (even preferred) plans to attend.
    via u/SugarGlitterkiss
  • 16
    indian-princess YTA. People are going to want to celebrate your birthday in your lifetime. It's literally because they love. you. Get used to it and stop being so unappreciative!
    via u/indian-princess
  • 17
    Spaghoochiema... NTA- you made it very clear that you did not want a party and they ambushed you with one anyway, it's downright disrespectful and people who do that just want to make your birthday an excuse for them to waste a night of their lives
    via u/Spaghoochiemama

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family drama aita text texts surprise Party parties family texting
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