Girlfriend Breaks It Off When Boyfriend Demands Their Future Kid Follow His Family’s Name Tradition: '[It's] a weird name'

Author image for Isabella Penn
Isabella Penn
Nov 12, 2024 9:00 PM EST

Some women start planning baby names long before they're even thinking about kids. It's practically a rite of passage. Who hasn't had a secret list in their phone filled with names they'd love for their future hypothetical children? After all, if we're the ones carrying the baby for nine months, we should get a big say in the name—no questions asked.

Well, for one woman, a casual name conversation with her boyfriend took a wild turn. She brought up a boy name she liked, and he seemed on board, until he added they'd have to save it for their second child. Turns out, he was holding out for an old family tradition for firstborn sons (which sounds a bit medieval, if you ask us). His attachment to this dusty family custom made her rethink everything. Why fight over hypothetical names when you can find someone who's on the same page?

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • 01
    r/AITAH ⚫9 hr. ago Ok-Risk-4415 AITA For Telling My Boyfriend I Won't Be Following His Families Traditions?
    via u/Ok-Risk-4415
  • 02
    Me (21F) and my boyfriend, let's call him Alex(23M) have been dating for about three years now. We've recently began talking about marriage and kids, something we both eventually want to have.
    via u/Ok-Risk-4415
  • 03
    The other day a reel popped up on my fyp of cute boy names and I saw the name Everett. I thought it was a adorable and jokingly told him how it has to be our firstborns name. He laughed and said he liked it but it'll have to wait for the second
    via u/Ok-Risk-4415
  • 04
    kid. I was confused and asked him why. He told me that his family has a tradition that every firstborn boy in the family has the same name. His oldest brother has it, his uncle has it, his grandfather has
    via u/Ok-Risk-4415
  • 05
    it and so on. For the sake of privacy and how oddly unique the name is, I'm not going to say it. I'm not judging in the slightest, but this is a weird name and it's honestly not my favorite. I would
    via u/Ok-Risk-4415
  • 06
    never say that to any of his family members, but I did tell Alex I'm not a huge fan of it. I told him I don't really want to follow those footsteps and he got upset and told me he can't be the one to break the tradition.
    via u/Ok-Risk-4415
  • 07
    He told me I was being an a_h_le for suggesting anything else. I told him I won't change my mind and we should make it a middle name or find another compromise.
    via u/Ok-Risk-4415
  • 08
    Alex has five siblings. The tradition will continue if he doesn't do it. And frankly, I think I should get a say in what I name my kid. I told him since I'm the one carrying the hypothetical child for nine months and it
    via u/Ok-Risk-4415
  • 09
    would already be getting Alex's last name, I should have some say in the first name. For context, I have two siblings, both girls. I'm the youngest and my eldest sisters are both married and took their husbands
    via u/Ok-Risk-4415
  • 10
    last names. It makes me a little sad that when I marry Alex, my last name will go out of existence. I've talked to him about hyphenating ours, something he doesn't want to do.
    via u/Ok-Risk-4415
  • 11
    But anyways, I really don't want to name our first born son, if we ever even have a boy, that name. He thinks I'm "whining for no reason" since we don't even have a kid yet and I'm not pregnant, but I think my concerns are valid.
    via u/Ok-Risk-4415
  • 12
    I've told some friends about it and most of them think I'm overreacting over something that doesn't even exist yet. So am I the a hole for telling my boyfriend I don't want to follow his families tradition?
    via u/Ok-Risk-4415
  • 13
    therealz... 11h ago • • Edited 10h ago • The issue isnt the name; the issue is your bf's attitude toward you having ideas that differ from his: he dismisses your wants, and puts his family's tradition ahead of you. To him, its not even a discussion. That's actually a little scary.
    via u/
  • 14
    You give 2 examples of him being inflexible (your last name and a baby name); I'll bet you can think of other incidents that fit this pattern, too. This is a glimpse into your future. Are you sure you want the rest of your life to look like this? ◇ 8.8K 8.8K ○ Reply
    via u/
  • 15
    WRose287 . 11h ago • ΝΤΑ It's a tradition in your (and most) family that the kids have a unique name chosen by their parents lol why would his tradition be more important? Why would he unilaterally choose a name? Also, if you want you can keep your last name ◇ 3.7K ○ Reply ...
    via u/
  • 16
    External_Expert_2069 . 11h ago • Great conversation to have before marriage and kids. You get to decide if this is a deal breaker for you. What other subjects does he believe you have no say in? 908 ○ Reply
    via u/
  • 17
    Opposite War9100 • 11h ago • NTA better think about it NOW because with baby on way there will be lot of problem if you cant be on same page. And if he is not ok with that better think about this relationship because i have feeling he will wait until last moment to push you do it "because you wont be able to leave with baby and will give in".... 536 ○ Reply ...
    via u/
  • 18
    BabydollxShy • 11h ago • YOU are the one carrying the baby so your opinion matters a lot. 325 325 ○ Reply
    via u/
  • 19
    El_Rompido • 10h ago • 1. Don't be pressured into taking a name. 2. Don't have kids for years, you're 21. 314 314 ☐ Reply
    via u/
  • 20
    Cheezburger Image 10426340608
    via Unsplash (Getty Images)

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

Tags

boyfriend aita dump him drama kids relationships parenting girlfriend family breakup Reddit children
Scroll Down For The Next Article