‘My dating life is none of your business’: Man Sets Boundaries With Ex-wife After She Catches Him Kissing Her Sister-in-law, She Demands He Break Up Immediately

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Nov 27, 2024 2:00 PM EST

Welcome back ladies and gentlemen of the internet. Dating is a roll of the dice. You may find someone you can spend the rest of your life with, or you could find someone who ruins it. It's painful to marry someone only for it to end in divorce, especially when there's infidelity involved. If you do get married and end up divorcing, you are free to date anyone after that, and no one can tell you not to. 

This takes us to the Reddit thread. In this story, the original poster (OP) is a man who's had a rough divorce with his wife after she cheated. He went no contact with her, all until her brother passed away suddenly. Knowing that she was close with him, he reached out and gave his condolences. He met with his ex-sister-in-law as well, as they had been close at the time and she was now grieving. But you'll have to read the full story below for all the juicy details. 

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  • 01
    r/AITAH 8 hr. ago Local_Watch632 AITAH for telling my ex wife my dating life is none of her business and to mind her own business?
    via u/Local_Watch632
  • 02
    My ex wife and I divorced a couple years ago after her affair. We did not keep in touch until last year when her brother unexpectedly passed away. I knew she was really close with her brother so I called her to give condolences. I was also close friends with her brother's wife
    via u/Local_Watch632
  • 03
    Zoe. We have been friends since middle school, so I also called Zoe to give condolences, and Zoe invited me to the funeral. At the funeral, Zoe was pretty much with me the whole time, and she was taking it really hard.
    via u/Local_Watch632
  • 04
    A couple of months after the funeral, Zoe texted me asking if we could hangout. Zoe had some really dark thoughts, and we ended up making these hangouts a weekly thing. A couple of months later, Zoe asked if we could go have dinner, and we did. We also made these dinners a weekly thing where every
    via u/Local_Watch632
  • 05
    Saturday, we would go have dinner in a different restaurant. During one of these dinners, she also kissed me, and since then we usually kiss after these dinners. I'm however taking it really slowly and carefully because Zoe is just going through a lot of emotions, and even though Zoe has wanted to
    via u/Local_Watch632
  • 06
    take it a step further multiple times, I told her we just need to go slow and maybe wait a few more months.
    via u/Local_Watch632
  • 07
    Last week, I was having dinner with Zoe and when I came back home, my ex wife texted me saying she had seen me and Zoe kiss at the restaurant. She then called me. My ex wife was really angry that I was dating Zoe, and she said it was very disrespectful to her brother. My ex wife was even crying on the call, and told
    via u/Local_Watch632
  • 08
    me to stop seeing Zoe. I however told my ex wife my dating life was none of her business, and to mind. her own business. I then hung up the call. I do think it was a bit crude what I said, but I just didn't want to speak with my ex wife. Was I the AH?
    via u/Local_Watch632
  • 09
    saintandvillian • 8h ago Top 1% Commenter NTA. Your ex wasn't worried about who dated who when she cheated so she needs to keep that same energy.
    via u/saintandvillian
  • 10
    • MikeReddit74 ⚫ 8h ago • NTA. She's your ex-wife, whose infidelity ended your marriage. You don't owe her any consideration. Live your life, and date whoever you want to.
    via u/MikeReddit74
  • 11
    Apart-Scene-9059 8h ago NTA: You are correct 100% not her business
    via u/Apart-Scene-9059
  • 12
    Careless_Welder_... 8h ago • Did Zoe have kids with her brother?? Because if she did, you are right back into the crazy.
    via u/Careless_Welder_
  • 13
    Francl27 .7h ago • NTA, but proceed cautiously, she just lost her husband and is probably not making rational decisions.
    via u/Francl27
  • 14
    Charlielovestuna 8h ago • NTA Just because your ex is - grieving, doesn't give her cheating a the right to dictate who you can and can't date. It's not like you started hooking up the following weekend.
    via u/Charlielovestuna
  • 15
    Also, pretty sure you owe nothing to her deceased brother.
    via u/Charlielovestuna
  • 16
    Proud_Ad_8830 • 7h ago • NTA but as a woman widowed young I applaud you for going slow. I also cation you to guard your heart because she may not be done grieving.
    via u/Proud_Ad_8830
  • 17
    MyWifeisa Troll • 7h ago • "If your dating life was none of my business while we were married, then my dating life isn't your business when we're divorced." Done
    via u/MyWifeisa Troll
  • 18
    Sharp_Toe_9186 • 5h ago While your ex doesn't have input in your dating life... there are more women, why mix with your ex sister in law? I think this is weird
    via u/Sharp_Toe_9186
  • 19
    Know_1_7777777 ⚫8h ago⚫ NTA. You're going about it in the best way possible by taking it slow and seeing if it's something real or just her going through grief so props to you for that. Also you're 1000% right in telling your ex wife off because she really needs to stay the f out of
    via u/Know_1_7777777
  • 20
    your personal life and mind her own business. She lost all right to tell you anything the second she let some other ah lef her. It may have been crude, but it needed to be to make your point to her so don't apologize for any of it. Good luck.
    via u/Know_1_7777777
  • 21
    marianacc1994 • 7h ago • Nta for the wife thing but be careful with Zoe. She lost her husband.
    via u/marianacc1994
  • 22
    Fancy Tulip89 .7h ago • All around it is a weird situation. The ex-wife is understandingly upset. She feels her brothers honor is being disrespected, but honestly- if you feel that you have done nothing wrong, she has no say. The ex is the ex for a reason. The widow
    via u/Fancy Tulip89
  • 23
    has no entanglements now. It may be awkward. But it was sure awkward when she was caught cheating wasn't it?!
    via u/Fancy Tulip89
  • 24
    • DesertSong-LaLa ⚫ 8h ago • NTA - It may be a sensitive topic to others but you have right to set a boundary with your ex-wife. Zoe and you will navigate this in a direction that makes sense to you both. Your relationship with Zoe pre-dates high school.
    via u/DesertSong-LaLa
  • 25
    Pearl Riona 6h ago • NTA, your ex lost the right to dictate your life. Focus on Zoe and her healing.
    via u/Pearl Riona
  • 26
    TapSoft7074 8h ago • NTA- the problem is not Zoe, the problem is that it hurts your wife to know that you made it without her.
    via u/TapSoft7074
  • 27
    I know that Is not your responsability But take care of Zoe... I know how clingy women react... And considering that you refused to give in to her demands, it's only a matter of time before your ex-wife calls Zoe or pays her a threatening and dangerous visit
    via u/TapSoft7074
  • 28
    neverfearcovid • 8h ago • Top 1% Commenter NTA, none of your ex's bizniss
    via u/neverfearcovid
  • 29
    Haute_Tater • 7h ago • I will be the unpopular opinion. NTA-ish Although it is something to be expected. This was the wife of her brother. Her brother was just taken from this world. Whether she cheated or not, while you guys were broken
    via u/Haute_Tater
  • 30
    up. Her brother was still there, along with Zoe. So again, although this is not her place, it should've been expected and you probably could've handled it better. Just because she was a cheater doesn't mean that is what is supposed to distinguish how you move.
    via u/Haute_Tater
  • 31
    The only reason you reached out was because of the passing her brother.. It wasn't like Zoe divorced from the brother and then you guys started doing what you were doing, you were literally sitting next to her at the funeral.. We also have no idea the details of Zoe and
    via u/Haute_Tater
  • 32
    her brother, whether children were involved. Does she still deal with her deceased spouse family? There's a lot of information and details that would make the difference..
    via u/Haute_Tater

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