Woman Refuses to Cook Turkey for Thanksgiving After Hostess Tells Her She Can’t Bring Her Dog to Dinner, Forcing Hostess to Find an Alternative on the Day

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Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Dec 2, 2024 3:00 PM EST

As much as I love dogs and believe me, I love dogs, I don't think I would be very happy if a friend decided to show up at my home with a dog without asking for my permission or at least giving me a heads up. Dogs are great, but they are also a lot to deal with, so bringing that energy to someone else's house is definitely something you should run by them first. 

Especially on holidays like Thanksgiving. If someone decides to host a Thanksgiving dinner, they have to get their house ready for all the people, the food, and the mess that comes with the combination of those two. Adding a dog to the mix? I don't see why people would consider that a good idea. That is what OP (original poster) was trying to explain to her friend who insisted on bringing her dog to the Thanksgiving dinner OP invited her to. However, the friend refused to leave her dog behind, which meant OP had to find another way to get a turkey for her dinner…

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  • 01
    At this point, she got upset and said, “Well, I guess you'll have Thanksgiving without a turkey then." I was surprised because it felt like she was trying to pressure me into letting her bring the dog, implying that she wouldn't come without it.
    via jane
  • 02
    AITA for not allowing my husband's friend to bring her dog to Thanksgiving dinner?
    via WarningKey4701
  • 03
    My husband asked if we could host Thanksgiving this year. We usually don't host because our apartment is small, and we don't have guest parking, but he was really excited. We used to host
    via WarningKey4701
  • 04
    events at our old place, and it was fun. Most of our guests are friends, and everyone agreed to bring a dish. One of his friends, let's call her Chelsey, volunteered to make the turkey.
    via WarningKey4701
  • 05
    On Thanksgiving day, one of his other friends asked if she could bring her cat. I said no pets because, as mentioned, we live in a small apartment, and it's a dinner gathering. I didn't think it would be comfortable for anyone,
    via WarningKey4701
  • 06
    including the pets. My husband suggested we also let Chelsey know about our no-pet rule, and I agreed. I was a bit hesitant, though, because Chelsey is one of those people who likes to bring her dog everywhere. If she
    via WarningKey4701
  • 07
    can't bring the dog, she arranges for a dog sitter. In the past, she has caused some tension when her dog wasn't allowed at other events. I told my husband to text her to
    via WarningKey4701
  • 08
    check if she was planning on bringing her dog, as I didn't think it would be a good idea. I also offered to talk to her myself because my husband isn't as comfortable with confrontations.
    via WarningKey4701
  • 09
    He texted her, and she called afterward. He put her on speaker, and I could tell she was upset from the tone of her voice. Chelsey told me she always brings her dog everywhere, and I
    via WarningKey4701
  • 10
    pointed out that wasn't entirely true, since we've been to several events where she didn't bring the dog (which is true). She then asked why we hadn't mentioned this before the invitation, and I explained that I didn't think it was
    via WarningKey4701
  • 11
    necessary to mention it since I assumed it was understood that bringing pets to a dinner without asking isn't typical, especially when we don't even have pets ourselves.
    via WarningKey4701
  • 12
    At this point, she got upset and said, “Well, I guess you'll have Thanksgiving without a turkey then." I was surprised because it felt like she was trying to pressure me into letting her bring the dog, implying that she wouldn't come
    via WarningKey4701
  • 13
    without it. I don't like being pressured, especially in my own home, so I calmly responded that I was sorry she felt that way. She then interrupted and said, "No, I feel sorry for you, since you won't have a turkey," and hung up.
    via WarningKey4701
  • 14
    So, AITA for saying no to her bringing her dog? I feel like I was just setting a reasonable boundary, but now I'm second- guessing myself.
    via WarningKey4701
  • 15
    Tiny_Incident_2876 • 11h ago • When hosting, you never depend on your guest to bring the main entree. If you can't cook, you always find a restaurant that cooks dinner for holiday for price ,the key is always buy more
    via Tiny_Incident_2876
  • 16
    Flower-of-Telperion 11h ago • Part ipant [1] NTA but what is with your friends? One of them wanted to bring their cat?! They seriously wanted to wrangle their cat into a carrier and transport it to a strange environment for a single
    via Flower-of-Telperion
  • 17
    afternoon/evening? Chelsey's dog really can't be alone for a few hours? Has everyone gone insane?
    via Flower-of-Telperion
  • 18
    Kthaeh 11h ago A hole Aficionado [11] NTA. You set a boundary about your own home. Dog owners who assume their dogs are welcome everywhere are a h les, no matter how many people or businesses accommodate them.
    via Kthaeh
  • 19
    Dogs were commonly left at home for centuries and did just fine. There's absolutely no reason dogs can't be left at home for the length of a social event these days. And if this happens to not be true about some individual dog, it's still not everyone else's obligation to accept that dog in any and every space.
    via Kthaeh
  • 20
    TemptingPenguin369 Command... 11h ago • Top 1% Comme... INFO: This was a dinner on Thanksgiving Day, and on that same day, you spoke to Chelsey about not bringing her dog? Chelsey, the woman who "has caused some tension when her dog wasn't allowed at other
    via TemptingPenguin369
  • 21
    events"? If this is the correct timeline, ESH. Chelsey for trying to invite her dog along to everything. (I love my dog, but unless she's explicitly invited to accompany me by the host, she stays home.) Your husband, for
    via TemptingPenguin369
  • 22
    not telling "his friend" that her dog wasn't welcome, and acting as though he's just avoiding a confrontation when no confrontation is needed. "Our place is small so no pets are invited" is not confrontational, but he dumped the job of talking
    via TemptingPenguin369
  • 23
    to Chelsey on you. And you, for assuming that "it was understood that bringing pets to a dinner. without asking isn't typical" when you know Chelsey always tries, and waiting till the absolute last minute to let her know her dog was not invited.
    via TemptingPenguin369
  • 24
    WarningKey4701 OP 11h ago • It seems like we both made assumptions here. I assumed it was reasonable to expect someone to ask before bringing their pet into someone else's home. On the other hand, she assumed that since she usually takes her pet everywhere, our home
    via WarningKey4701
  • 25
    would naturally be included without needing an explicit invitation. It's clear we were coming from different perspectives, and I can see now how that led to the misunderstanding.
    via WarningKey4701
  • 26
    • Ucyless 11h ago NTA. Make sure you post tons of pictures of the turkey you make.
    via Ucyless
  • 27
    WarningKey4701 OP 10h ago • Unfortunately, we didn't have time to make a turkey, so we swung by the convenience store and grabbed some sliced turkey instead. Surprisingly, it turned out to be an amazing and fun evening! Everyone who came brought such great energy, and we all had a fantastic time together
    via WarningKey4701

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friendship dogs aita drama cooking thanksgiving dispute friends wife reddit story husband Turkey dinner entitled food Reddit happy thanksgiving entitled people
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