UPDATE: Parents Skip Daughter's Wedding for Son's Football Game, Sparking Accusations of Favoritism and Fiery Debate

Author image for Sienna Varady
Sienna Varady
Jul 11, 2024 1:00 PM EDT

Within the family, favoritism is not unheard of. But when does someone have to stand up, declare that they can no longer tolerate their parents' disregard, and make an effort to break free from their authority?

Below is an update to a story that was published just over a week ago. The original poster (OP) recently got married to the love of her life in a private ceremony that was seen by all of her friends and relatives. Her parents caused a stir in the family and the community at large by preferring to attend their son's football tournament over her wedding, evident by their glaring absence.

Today, we're back with an update that addresses everything that has transpired since our previous post. Therefore, if you're curious about how things escalated further and led OP to publicly renounce her parents and sibling, be sure to read the story below! After you're done, don't forget to read the story of the woman who was forced to attend her sister's wedding to her cheating ex-fiancé or risk losing her parents' financial support!

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • 01
    Now onto the update, things have been a little crazy this past week. I got off of Reddit for a couple of days, to gather my thoughts. Then, I had a lengthy conversation with Lucas about how to proceed. He's been my rock, and I don't think I could ever love him more than I already do. My parents were always a taboo topic, but he hit me with a brutal reality check that I absolutely needed. We reached the conclusion that the fact I kept in contact all this time, stuck around and couldn't go NC, isn
    via canva
  • 02
    Update: AITA for not telling my parents that the event they were missing was my wedding?
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 03
    First of all, I want to thank all those who were interested in my story, and those who wished me and my husband a happy life. I am beyond grateful for your reassuring messages, and your love and feedback. The response was overwhelming and beyond what I ever thought it could be. I love you all so so much |
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 04
    To those who believed my story was fake, i want to say that I'm happy your family life is better than mine, to the point of thinking of my reality as a fantasy, but I'd appreciate it if you stopped harassing me in DM, claiming that I'm writing a fake story for attention. If I've missed a few details in the OG post, it's because I was overwhelmed and crying my eyes out because of my family's hara nt. You are not forced to read my story, or think it's true, but I think keeping the smallest amount
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 05
    Oh, and before diving in the update let me clarify a few things: 1. Yes, the invitation specifically stated it was a wedding. No excuses. 2. My maternal side of the family didn't come to the wedding. I'm sorry, I didn't make that clear in the OG post. Most of them were busy, and the others just gave me excuses to send a gift but not come. That's it. Don't ask me why they didn't discuss my wedding with my mom, it's not like I live in their brain.
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 06
    3. My mother's “atonement” is the fact that she apologized via text:.:D:D:D:D:D: Now onto the update, things have been a little crazy this past week. I got off of Reddit for a couple of days, to gather my thoughts. Then, I had a lengthy conversation with Lucas about how to proceed. He's been my rock, and I don't think I could ever love him more than I already do. My parents were always a taboo topic, but he hit me with a brutal reality check
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 07
    that I absolutely needed. We reached the conclusion that the fact I kept in contact all this time, stuck around and couldn't go NC, isn't healthy. I've realized that, the reason I never fully went NC, was that deep down I just wanted their approval, even now, for once. Pathetic, I know. But it's like a d g, being with my parents. They can be loving, funny, caring and warm, until they're not. The little love they give makes you crave for more, and you want their
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 08
    approval so badly you destroy yourself. But that's enough. I promised myself that things are going to change. I've thought about it, and decided to start therapy, and to go NC with all those who made an issue about this situation, for good this time. After the days dedicated on reflecting on how I feel, I ended up messaging my father to tell him that, if he wanted to talk, I would meet him, mom and Mike in
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 09
    a neutral location the following day. He immediately replied and agreed, and we met at the park. My father's sisters and brother accompanied us for damage control. My father looked distraught and as if he had been crying for a while. My mom looked the same, but I think it was more out of anger and embarrassment. My brother looked annoyed. I told the three of them about how their behavior and preference in regards of my brother always hurt
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 10
    me, and that their a ive behavior made me realize that I didn't want contact with any of them again after that meeting. My mother tried to cut me off multiple times, but my aunt (the one who posted on FB) shut her up every single time. When I asked them why would they treat me this way, they didn't know what to say. My father kept crying and apologizing without giving me an answer, and my uncle reprimanded him for it. My mother seemed as
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 11
    if she was asking herself that for the first time, but well, in the end she just said that she simply disliked me. Plain and simple. And my brother? He just liked the attention and making me miserable as some kind of sport. I went on with my questions. When I asked why they never responded to my invite, they claimed to have never received one. I showed them the texts, but they denied receiving them. And well, it turns out
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 12
    that they hadn't, in fact, received my wedding invitation. When it arrived to their house, they weren't there. The only one in the house was my brother, who had come visiting for the weekend. He saw the invite and, as many of you guessed, ripped it up and trashed it. And then, when I texted my parents, he deleted the messages (wasn't hard to do, according to him they kept my chat archived and didn't get the notification). So, my parents never actually got a formal invitation. I was just distraug
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 13
    I asked Mike why would he do that, and he just shrugged, and claimed that it wasn't as important as the stuff they had in program anyway. I had to stop Lucas from p hing him in the face. Strangely enough, my parents were upset, and started reprimanding him. He actually began to throw a tantrum and cry crocodile tears, and I must admit that I was kind of satisfied. But then my mom
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 14
    claimed that all was resolved, there was no need to fuss over a "misunderstanding", and it was time for me to clear their name. That set me off, and I interrupted her, telling her that they weren't forgiven at all, that just because Mike trashed the invite, it didn't mean it automatically canceled all their neglect out. Plus, all that time it was still very obvious that I was having a wedding, and they should've asked about it. You want to know my mother's response? She said something along the
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 15
    lines of "I did hear you talking about a wedding of yours, but I just thought you were being delusional, and seeking my attention with exaggerated scenarios". She was convinced Lucas didn't actually like me, nor would ever marry me. When I tell you I was about to t sh her face, do you believe me? Another thing came up. It turns out that my brother didn't have a football game to go to at all. My
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 16
    parents used the fact that my husband, friends and I know little to nothing about football (we prefer soccer), and the fact I stopped asking about it when Mike would mock me during his time in high school, to make up a story to avoid my event. At the time I wrote the OG post, I couldn't confirm or deny the presence of a game because my brother has private social media and Lucas and I are blocked, and I foolishly trusted my parents' word. But no. You want
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 17
    to know where they went with that man child? They went to Disneyland, because Mike wanted to go. They used the football story to cover for my brother's hundredth tantrum-holiday, and apparently they did it multiple times in the past months. At that point I was just completely burnt out and overwhelmed by this amount of informations. The fact that I had been fooled this badly, that I was so
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 18
    d boil, and I guillible, genuinely made my b snapped. I stood up, and told my father he was a sad, weak man, unable to stand up for his kids unless his wife approved of it. I told my brother he was a little d it, a poor excuse of a man that will not accomplish anything in his life and that he'll always live like the leech he is, babied to the point of uselessness. And to my mom, I just... I told her that
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 19
    she was the worst nar sist, pathetic, little woman on the earth, that she didn't even deserve to be addressed and judged, for her irrelevance. That not even God could help her out because she is just too rotten. Harsh, I know. My mother s t up from her seat to scream at me halfway through my rant to her, but I was just too mad. I shouted at her to shut the f up and sit
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 20
    down, and listen for once. She got so mad, it felt like steam was coming out of her ears. I don't remember much after that, just that I kept talking. And talking. It felt as if all my anger and hurt just flooded out. At one point I'm pretty sure the whole park was silent. I spat at my parents and Mike that I was disowning them all, and that if they're smart, they'll think before reaching out again. I took my purse and left with Lucas, Anna and Francis, leaving my parents
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 21
    and brother at my aunts and uncle's mercy. I think at some point the reality of what I had just learned and said finally hit me, because I ended up having a panic a ck on the way home. Lucas was driving, so Anna helped me through it until we stopped in a parking lot to calm me down. I am beyond grateful for their help. Once home, I just fell on the bed and went to sleep.
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 22
    I really wanted to go with you guys' advice, and post the whole thread on FB, but given my work and career I couldn't expose myself like that. One thing is sharing my story from an anonymous throwaway on Reddit, the other is on FB, with my name and face plastered everywhere. I couldn't go down that path. Instead, I did something better: I made a folder with all of my mother's insults, messages and awful
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 23
    comments, and sent it to the woman in charge of my mom's church. It's a tight knit community my mom worked her a off to enter in, but that is also extremely judgmental, and being shunned by them is a d sentence. And well, that's exactly what happened. Just like clockwork, the scandal spread like wild fire, going out of the church and reaching the rest of the small town. You can imagine what this means for my mother and father.
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 24
    Because of my little spill, I did find other messages from my maternal side of the family, belittling me even more for upsetting their sister or daughter and insulting her. I just didn't care anymore at that point, so I followed you guys' advice, and told them that from now on, they will no longer be part of my life, and that they can talk st all they want, I just won't care. Instead, they should be grateful I don't send
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 25
    their nasty texts to their employers and spouses. I blocked every single one of them, grandparents included, on everything. I did find a lengthy message from my father. He apologized for not being strong enough to face my mother, agreed that what I said was true, and couldn't believe that he had lost so much of my life because of her. He told me he is going to divorce her no matter what my decision will be, because he is
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 26
    tired of being controlled. He would like a relationship with me to make up for all the years that passed. I did reply to him, to tell him that as of now I really don't want to see him or forgive him. He has replied that he'll try his best to win me back, and that he loves me. I replied back that, as of now, I find that hard to believe, and then blocked him too. Frankly, his slimy way of trying to have an out from this situation by throwing my mother under the bus
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 27
    is pathetic. At least, she was hateful and owned up to it. He is only able to blame others for his choices. I don't want to surround myself with people like that. My mother and brother are blocked similarly to my maternal side. Mike wrote other messages to taunt and insult me, and I just blocked him. My mom threw herself a pity party for being shunned by her community and for her marriage going into shambles, and I just replied "good riddance"before
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 28
    blocking her too. As for my grandpa, he has decided to stay with us for a while, to stick by my side. He really is the best, and has read some of your comments (he isn't going to admit that he's flattered by them). Since then a few days have passed, and all has been quiet. Lucas is spoiling me rotten, and I'm starting therapy soon. I know this isn't the drama filled, revenge full update you hoped for, but well, this is it. I'll let you know if anything changes or evolves.
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 29
    Thank you so much for the love and support you showed me. I think I'm going to log out now. As for now, goodbye! TLDR: I've decided to start therapy. I confronted my parents and brother about their behavior and ended up disowning them. I sent my mother's nasty messages to the leader of her church and now she and her husband are shunned by their community.
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 30
    big_bob_c. 8 hr. ago It's astonishing that your parents could hear your brother openly admit that he destroyed the invitation and then frame is as a "misunderstanding", that's some grade-AAA cognitive dissonance there. You are well rid of them. Live your best life, and never let them into it.
    via u/big_bob_c
  • 31
    BigDulles 8 hr. ago • "I know this isn't the drama filled, revenge full update some of you were hoping for" Girl it was much better. Good for you.
    via u/BigDulles
  • 32
    Auroraquinn087 9 hr. ago. Dear internet stranger, I commend you for what you did!!! That must have been the hardest confrontation ever, but you delivered their comeuppance with an eloquent firestorm and had your support system to allow you to let it all out; I admire you. It must have felt so cathartic!
    via u/Auroraquinn087
  • 33
    Now down on your crown, like the queen you are, and leave those behind and surround yourself with only those that support and love you. Take good care and congratulations on your wedding
    via u/Auroraquinn087

Tags

daughter entitled entitlement marriage siblings loyalty Reddit family feud update wedding sibling rivalry askreddit entitled parents family drama entitled people marriage-drama entitled people karma
Scroll Down For The Next Article