Older sister bridesmaid demands bride change her pink and green wedding colors because they don't compliment her complexion: 'She even threatened not to come if I didn't change the colors'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Dec 19, 2024 8:00 PM EST

I don't get it when people claim that specific colors look horrible on them. Maybe I'm just a narcissist, but I wear crazy bright colors all the time and have never found a color I think looks horrible on me. I don't particularly like wearing all black, but that's not the color's fault; it's just a matter of personal preference. Still, there is no shortage of people who will refuse to put anything on their body that doesn't fit perfectly into their color scheme, and the sister in this story is one of those people.

You have to be pretty low to demand that a bride or a groom change their wedding to suit your liking. I'm not talking about suggesting things in the planning phase, like mentioning that most of their friends and family couldn't afford to travel for a destination wedding. I'm talking about micromanaging a menial decision that's already been paid for. 

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    IUEN Marriage Kirsty
    via Wedding Photography

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    AITA for uninviting my sister from my wedding after she demanded I change my wedding colors because they "clash" with her complexion?
    via u/bballpro37
  • 03
    1 (28F) am getting married to the love of my life (30M) in six months. We've been planning our dream wedding for over a year, and everything was going smoothly until recently.
    via u/bballpro37
  • 04
    My older sister, Sarah (32F), has always been... particular. She's very into aesthetics and her personal image. She's also used to getting her way. When we were kids, she was always the "golden child," and my parents rarely told her no.
    via u/bballpro37
  • 05
    We're not super close, but we're on decent terms. I asked her to be a bridesmaid, and she accepted. I was happy to have her be a part of my special day.
    via u/bballpro37
  • 06
    We decided on a color scheme of dusty rose and sage green for our wedding. I love these colors, and they fit perfectly with our outdoor, garden-themed venue. I sent out a mood board to the bridal party, including Sarah, to give them an idea of the overall vibe.
    via u/bballpro37
  • 07
    A few days later, Sarah called me, practically in tears. She said the colors were "horrendous" and would "completely wash her out." She has olive skin and dark hair, and apparently, these colors are her "worst nightmare." She demanded I change the entire wedding color scheme to something that would "complement her better," like jewel tones.
    via u/bballpro37
  • 08
    I was shocked. I tried to explain that we had already put down deposits based on these colors, and it was way too late to change everything. I also reminded her that the wedding is about me and my fiancé, not her.
    via u/bballpro37
  • 09
    She went ballistic, accused me of being selfish and inconsiderate, and said I was "ruining her experience." She even threatened not to come if I didn't change the colors.
    via u/bballpro37
  • 10
    After a few days of her relentless pressure and guilt-tripping, I finally snapped. I told her that if she was that unhappy with the colors, then maybe it was best if she didn't come at all. I uninvited her from the wedding and the bridal party.
    via u/bballpro37
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    Now, my parents are furious. They're saying I'm overreacting and being a "bridezilla." They're accusing me of ruining the family over something as trivial as wedding colors. Some of my extended family are also taking her side, saying I should be more accommodating.
    via u/bballpro37
  • 12
    My fiancé supports my decision, but I'm starting to feel incredibly guilty. I'm also heartbroken that this is causing such a huge rift in my family. Maybe i should have tried harder to make my sister happy, even if it meant changing my vision.
    via u/bballpro37
  • 13
    So, Reddit, AITA for uninviting my sister from my wedding because she demanded I change my wedding colors to suit her complexion?
    via u/bballpro37
  • 14
    dreamxemma • 11h ago • NTA. It's your wedding, not her fashion show. Changing the colors because she doesn't like how she'll look is selfish and unreasonable, especially with deposits already made. Her reaction was over the top, and uninviting her was fair if she couldn't support you without making it about herself. Focus on your big day, you deserve it
    via u/dreamxemma
  • 15
    • arianrhodd 10h ago Top 1% Commenter They're accusing me of ruining the family over something as trivial as wedding colors. The sister's reaction over something "as trivial as wedding colors" was the thing that threatened to ruin the wedding. Seriously, WHO asks the bride/groom to change the wedding colors to shades more flattering to them?!?!! WHO DOES THAT?!?!?!!! 6
    via u/arianrhodd
  • 16
    Sunmoon98 • 10h ago And if op gives in then the sister will be like this forever. Teach her and your family a lesson on how to deal with entitled brats because that's exactly how she's acting. Kick her out the wedding party, stand your grown and go enjoy your backers party and wedding without a Debbie downer that's always worried about herself.
    via u/Sunmoon98
  • 17
    BunnnyAurora • 11h ago · Exactly! She's a grown woman throwing a tantrum. It's OP's wedding; her sister needs to get over herself. The entitlement is astounding. Good for OP for standing her ground. The parents are being ridiculous; they're enabling Sarah's behavior. OP should ignore the drama and focus on her wedding. She's NTA; her sister is. Seriously, who acts like that?
    via u/BunnnyAurora
  • 18
    • IcyWheel ⚫ 11h ago • NTA You are starting a new phase of your life, do it on your terms and stop letting your family's dysfunction shadow your life. Tell your parents that they have always favored your sister and she's now a 32-year old spoiled brat who thinks your wedding should be all about her. Do not back down, your life will be the better for it.
    via u/IcyWheel
  • 19
    OwlT1me 11h ago • • NTA: This is your wedding. It's also a chance to start a new family with your husband who supports you. Sadly it might be time to trim the weeds.
    via u/OwlT1me
  • 20
    hufflepufflepass • 10h ago • Yup! It's time for the sis to hear "NO." Anyone supporting her over OP when it's OP's wedding can kick rocks.
    via u/hufflepufflepass
  • 21
    Anxious_Coconut6265 • 11h ago • NTA - and if your family consider wedding colours trivial then they should be telling your sister to skit up for something "trivial". Additionally. She's the bridesmaid. Not the bride. She doesn't get to have anything her way to be honest. This day is for you and your soon to be husband. It is absolutely nothing to do with her.
    via u/Anxious_Coconut6265
  • 22
    Rowism1221 • 11h ago • This... can't be real. In the unlikely event it is, absolutely NTA.
    via u/Rowism1221
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    Amberleh • 11h ago • You would be surprised at how closed-minded and selfish some people are. This happened about 2 weeks ago. I have a 'friend' (I stay friends with her for the sake of her eldest child, who I mentor/provide a meaningful like-minded friendship group for) who recently, after MY baby shower, apparently went on a huge tirade to said oldest child about how horrible I was for inviting so many people from the aforementioned friendship group and it made the
    via u/Amberleh
  • 24
    mom feel 'excluded'. Mind you, she spent the entire party in a separate room, BY HER OWN CHOICE, sitting on her phone apparently fuming that it was 'too noisy' in the main room because of the people I invited. To MY baby shower. People who have gone above and beyond for me and my unborn child, while she couldn't even be bothered to write me a letter of recommendation for something I REALLY needed her for.
    via u/Amberleh
  • 25
    What's even crazier, is that I had the people who planned the shower for me order these tiny little ducks that came in a pack of 220. I gave like 5 each to some of the guests. The mom really wanted them for her classroom of 3-4 year old preschoolers. I let her have a big chunk of them, but not all of them. She kept badgering me the whole party about how I should give them all to her, then would get 'jokingly' mad any time I gave some away to someone. When I took the rest for myself, because they
    via u/Amberleh
  • 26
    "What did you do with MY ducks?!" And then kept badgering me about what I was going to use them for. She was mad I said I would give them to my students (who I would be leaving soon because of maternity leave) because they're high schoolers and 'her kids would appreciate them more." I tried to keep brushing her off because she kept trying to play it like a joke, but found out later she was saying I was "mean" for not giving them to her. When I tried to just send her a link to the things on amazo
    via u/Amberleh
  • 27
    Point is, narcissists are narcissists. They have a ridiculous sense of self-importance and just cannot fathom that the world doesn't revolve around them.
    via u/Amberleh
  • 28
    Trash-panda-art • 11h ago • NTA-I dress in a gothic fashion most of the time or at least some form of witchy vibe. I wear black clothes with heavy dramatic make up.... it's a big part of who I am and I love that about myself. I have a look that is recognisably me. If I was a bridesmaid and they wanted me to wear a dusty rose dress with rose gold eyeshadow and a lipstick I would be happy to do so... put me in whatever as long as it physically fits I will wear it. Worst case if I have to buy it my
    via u/Trash-panda-art

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