Woman Cancels Christmas Party After Mother-In-Law Keeps Making Unreasonable Demands, Husband Takes Mil’s Side, Leading To a Family Dispute: ‘They're saying I ruined the holidays’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Dec 26, 2024 2:00 PM EST

If hosting a Christmas party is not hard enough, imagine how impossible it can feel when you also have to deal with your insufferable in-laws. You have to be extremely brave (or unbelievably insane) to try and pull something like that off. This is probably why the woman in this Reddit story would rather cancel her Christmas party altogether than deal with the drama that is about to ensue.

While I have a (somewhat) good relationship with my mother-in-law, there are some things that I will never attempt to do when she is near, and planning a party for the family is one of them. Mothers-in-law love to involve themselves when it comes to these types of events, and they end up being much more difficult to handle than the party itself.

But even canceling the party wasn't the main issue for the family here. The main problem was that the husband decided to take his mother's side and criticize his wife for not wanting to host the party, and that is simply not an acceptable husband behavior…

Keep scrolling to read the full story. Up next, check out this story of a relationship drama that started when the couple exchanged Christmas gifts.

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  • 01
    I put my foot down and said I was not going to do any of this anymore and canceled the party. I already have enough to do with my own family and the party itself. I told Mark I wasn't doing any of it and that I wasn't hosting the party.
    via Anna Belousova
  • 02
    AITAH for canceling my Christmas party because my mother in law kept adding demands
    via Any_Release7171
  • 03
    So I (29F) am married to my husband Mark (32M), and his mom Debbie has been nonstop with her requests lately. I just couldn't take it anymore, so I canceled the party.
    via Any_Release7171
  • 04
    Every year we host Christmas at our house but Debbie always adds stress with her demands. This year, she asked if I could make her casserole for the party because she couldn't. Then she
    via Any_Release7171
  • 05
    wanted me to set up a dessert table, and later asked if I could go to her house and pick up decorations because she wasn't prepared. I already decorated everything, but she just wanted to
    via Any_Release7171
  • 06
    change everything. Yesterday she voluntold me that she invited some inlaws from oversea and that said that they can stay with me. I put my foot down and said I was not going to do any of this
    via Any_Release7171
  • 07
    anymore and canceled the party. I already have enough to do with my own family and the party itself. I told Mark I wasn't doing any of it and that I wasn't hosting the party.
    via Any_Release7171
  • 08
    Mark tried to convince me to just do it because it's Christmas and the inlaws had no other place to stay but I felt like my mother inlaw was being unreasonable. Now all of Mark's family is mad at
    via Any_Release7171
  • 09
    me, saying I ruined the holidays. I feel like I was being taken advantage of and my husband wouldn't back me up. AITAH?
    via Any_Release7171

  • While it is well known that mothers-in-law are hard to handle, the least a wife can expect is for her husband to stand by her side, and have her back in cases like these. When that does not happen, not only is it not helping the family dynamic, but it can also cause a serious strain on the relationship itself.

    So what is the morale of this story? 

    Husbands, have your wives' backs!

  • 10
    StandingGoat • 12h ago • NTA There was room for - compromise up until the point. when she invited someone to stay at your home without asking you first. That seriously crosses a line. Your husband really needs to have your back and keep his family in check, he's definitely part of the problem.
    via StandingGoat
  • 11
    xSweetPeony • 12h ago • Inviting people to stay without asking is a huge boundary violation. Your husband should have supported you and handled his family better. You had every right to put your foot down. NTA
    via xSweetPeony
  • 12
    Onlyonetrueking •4h ago • Top 5% Commenter This, op you have a husband issue to he should have been as a fronted as you were. It is very telling that he was trying to guilt trip you. Mommies boy failed you. Your nta, but you may need to reevaluate your position as none of them should have put you in this situation, and they owe you an apology as they have no right to be mad.
    via Onlyonetrueking
  • 13
    hummus_sapiens • 12h ago • Top 1% Commenter If it is so important to him, he can host. Cook, clean, lay the table, prepare a guest room, entertain the guests and clean up.after the party. He doesn't like it? Then shut the f up.
    via hummus_sapiens
  • 14
    Luna Mitch 12h ago You're not TA for canceling the party. It sounds like your mother-in-law was putting too much on you, and you set clear boundaries. Mark should've supported you, and it's understandable to prioritize your well-being over everyone else's demands.
    via LunaMitch
  • 15
    celticmusebooks • 12h ago • Top 1% Commenter So these inlaws were coming from out of the country so your MIL KNEW they were coming and needed a place for them to stay but waited until the last minute to tell you? Why can't the inlaws stay with MIL? Kudos to your for shutting that down-- sorry your husband didn't have your back like a good husband would have.
    via celticmusebooks
  • 16
    teresajs 12h ago • ΝΤΑ MIL can host the ILs. She can host Christmas. She even has the decorations to do so. I recommend that you block the ILs on your phone and social media.
    via teresajs
  • 17
    thisloveev 12h ago • NTA, you're not obligated to cater to unreasonable demands. Cancelling the party was a fair boundary
    via thisloveev
  • 18
    angusthebutcher • 12h ago • When you marry someone they become the most important person in your life. Wife or husband trumps all your previous family. You live with wife or husband, not mom, not dad or anyone else they are now your partner
    via angusthebutcher
  • 19
    lapsteelguitar ⚫11h ago. Top 1% Commenter You didn't ruin the holidays. You ruined the holiday plans other people made for you, without your knowledge or permission. Big difference. ΝΤΑ
    via lapsteelguitar
  • 20
    Patrick_Hill_shadow • 12h ago • NTA. Your feelings are valid, and it sounds like your mother-in-law's constant demands were creating an unreasonable burden. It's okay to set boundaries, especially when you're feeling overwhelmed.
    via Patrick_Hill_shadow
  • 21
    Infamous-Fee7713 • 7h ago • Top 5% Commenter Yup, yet another spineless, weak willed momma's boy.
    via Infamous-Fee7713
  • 22
    Embarrassed-Car6161 12h ago • Continue to establish boundaries. She's doing it because you allowed it. Keep standing your ground.
    via Embarrassed-Car6161

Tags

christmas family drama aita marriage mother Christmas party wife reddit story husband in laws mother in law family Reddit married holidays
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