Entitled expecting mom asks if she can do her baby's gender reveal at her sister's wedding, refuses to take no for an answer: 'I want it to be about me and my fiancé, not about a baby we didn’t make'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Jan 9, 2025 8:00 PM EST

Gender reveal parties have only existed since 2008, and yet people treat them as if they're a sacred and intergenerational ritual of vast importance. I understand the function and importance of a baby shower; You need a lot of stuff before your first kid is born, and it's fun to celebrate such a big milestone with your friends and family. My conspiracy theory is that gender reveal parties are so popular because they allow parents to have what is functionally another baby shower for the subsequent children after their firstborn. The woman who threw the first gender reveal party even regrets that she ever started the trend, saying that she blames herself for the gender reveal parties where attendees famously passed from fires and explosions. 

If you want to have a gender reveal party, be my guest, but there's no reason that you should be tacking them onto much more important events like funerals and weddings. Though the gender-reveal funeral is, as far as I know, a hilariously untapped market, the expecting mom in this story tried to make her sister's wedding all about her. 

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    He She
    via Maurice Nguyen

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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    So, here's the deal. I (29F) am getting married in about two months to my wonderful fiancé (31M). We've been planning this wedding for over a year, and honestly, it's been a bit
    via u/baby_luna_star
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    of a circus, but we're finally getting everything together. Enter my sister (26F), who's pregnant with her first child. Super exciting for her and all, yay babies!
    via u/baby_luna_star
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    Now, my sister is one of those Pinterest-loving, gender-reveal- party enthusiasts. She's been planning this big reveal since she found out she was pregnant, and I swear her Pinterest boards are a terrifying mix of pink and blue confetti, cake explosions, and, at one point, a questionable plan involving colored smoke bombs. You get the idea.
    via u/baby_luna_star
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    Cheezburger Image 10452209664
    via Nadia Clabass (Unsplash+)

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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    Cheezburger Image 10452208896
    via Karina Kungla

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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    Last week, we were having a family dinner when she casually drops the bomb (pun intended) that she'd love to do the gender reveal at my wedding reception. You know, when everyone's already gathered, spirits are high,
    via u/baby_luna_star
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    and all that jazz. She even had a plan ready: halfway through the reception, she'd cut the cake, and boom, it's either pink or blue inside. She seemed genuinely excited, but I was a bit taken aback.
    via u/baby_luna_star
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    I told her I'd think about it, but honestly, I wasn't thrilled. I mean, it's my wedding day, right? I want it to be about me and my fiancé, not about a baby we didn't make. So, after mulling it over and talking with my fiancé (who was also not keen on the idea), I
    via u/baby_luna_star
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    politely told her that I didn't want to include the gender reveal in our wedding festivities. I suggested she have her own party another day, and I'd be more than happy to help plan it or bake the cake or whatever she needed.
    via u/baby_luna_star
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    Well, my sister wasn't too happy about my decision. She said I was being selfish and that it would be a "special family moment." My parents are kind of on the fence, but my mom did say something about how it would be a cute memory. Meanwhile, my dad just keeps nodding and staying out of it, which is basically his strategy for everything.
    via u/baby_luna_star
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    Now I'm here, second-guessing myself. Was I being too selfish? I mean, weddings are about family too, right? But also, I kind of want this day to be about my fiancé and me, without a side of gender reveal. So, AITA for putting my foot down on this one? Would love to hear your thoughts!
    via u/baby_luna_star
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    LibrarianNeat1999 No - so she's too cheap to throw her own (gag) gender reveal party.
    via u/LibrarianNeat1999

  • Literally, how much can a gender reveal party cost? The only thing you technically have to buy is a mechanism to reveal the titular gender, and with some Betty Crocker cake and store-bought frosting, it can be done for under $10.

  • 14
    CrystalMistral NTA - your wedding, your rules. She can have her own special day for the reveal!
    via u/CrystalMistral
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    OMVince Exactly! And OP should remind her sister it will already be a "special family moment"- what with OP getting married and all
    via u/OMVince
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    WhoKnewHomesteading Agreed and security needs to know that if she shows up with boxes to turn her away.
    via u/WhoKnewHomesteading
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    RebeccaMCullen Yeah, OP and fiancee are spending thousands of dollars to host a wedding reception. Fiancee's side of the family isn't going to care about OP's sister's baby gender, and it's very unlikely that OP/fiancee and sister have that many overlapping friends. Is the sister going also expect reception invites for her friends?
    via u/RebeccaMCullen
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    throwitaway3857 No. And make sure your wedding venue and caterer know what she's planning. If they see any cakes that don't look like yours, they're to be thrown in the garbage immediately. Don't show anyone what your cake looks like so she can't copy it.
    via u/throwitaway3857
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    Let your sister and everyone know you're hiring security and she will be thrown out if she even attempts to do it. NTA.
    via u/throwitaway3857
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    SteampunkHarley Yes all of this! Have a friend or someone you trust keep an eye on her, warn the DJ about letting anyone take the mike, etc. Sis is just being cheap. No one actually wants to see that. Your friends and your future in laws will be mortified
    via u/SteampunkHarley
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    cruiser4319 Do you or your mom know the gender yet? Even if you don't, quietly put it out there that sis is having a boy. 50/50 chance you are right and you've let the air out of her balloon before the wedding. Since she got pissy, you know she won't take "no" for an answer. And tell her to drop it or she will be uninvited and/or thrown out if she tries to hijack your wedding. The groomsmen can drag her out by her hair. I can't believe she wants to cut the cake! What an entitled beotch!
    via u/cruiser4319
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    Sensitive-Ad-5406 "So you want to use my very expensive event for free? AND be made a mockery of behind your back for years? Because only a moron hasn't cottoned on to how f ed up it is to announce at a wedding. No. No thank you"
    via u/Sensitive-Ad-5406
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    lifeinsatansarmpit It's also the groom's day and he's not on board with it
    via u/lifeinsatansarmpit
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    Heavy-Spite-3574 Gender reveals are for people who are desperate to be the center of attention.
    via u/Heavy-Spite-3574
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    Zealousideal_Hold893 Ask her to pay for half of your reception...perfect way to share the party
    via u/Zealousideal_Hold893

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Babies family drama baby pregnancy sisters siblings reddit story wedding family pregnant sibling sister reddit thread Reddit weddings gender reveal
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