‘He doesn't have enough money’: Woman buys herself a PS5 instead of waiting to buy it with boyfriend, he accuses her of being selfish, leading to a strain in their relationship

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Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Jan 17, 2025 9:00 PM EST

Many people believe that once a relationship becomes serious, especially when a couple moves in together, they should split everything equally between them. Not just physical objects, but also payments (yes, even on dates), responsibilities, and romantic gestures.

In theory, this may sound reasonable. Split everything 50/50 and keep track of it, easy peasy. 

Well, not necessarily. 

Sure, splitting things like chores around the house is easy enough. One can cook while the other does the dishes, one can sweep the floors while the other mops – pretty straightforward things. But when we're talking about splitting anything related to money, things can get complicated.

When a couple is not in the same financial place, and one makes more money than the other, splitting payments 50/50 is easier said than done. The one who makes less might not be able to afford to pay for half of everything, and they might even feel inferior because of it. On the other side of it, the one who makes more money might feel like they are being taken advantage of, or like they cannot truly enjoy their own money in front of their partner. 

Keep scrolling to read the story of a couple who struggles with this exact situation.

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  • "He's insecure about money, that's a him problem"
    via Bambanani Nguqu

  • "AITA for buying a ps5 without my boyfriend and saying it's mine?"

    My boyfriend (26m) and I (26f) have been together for about 8 months. We live together but have split financials.
    via gymgoldie
  • I worked hard and went to college, which is why I have a well paid job. When I met my boyfriend he didn't have a serious job, but he worked hard
    via gymgoldie
  • so we could live together and he now has a job with a decent income. He makes less than me and the rent etc. are divided pro rata. I paid for the first month of our rent (alone)
    via gymgoldie
  • and for our holidays and he still has to pay me back, but there's no rush as I don't need the money right away. We really love gaming together. He plays on his
    via gymgoldie
  • ps4 and I play on my nintendo switch. He mentioned he would like to buy a ps5 together so we can ditch the switch, because it's lagging alot. We did not talk about who
    via gymgoldie
  • would play on the ps4 and who would play on the ps5, but the costs would be split in half. I also said I would love to have a ps5, since I play on the switch and it s <s. My boyfriend
    via gymgoldie
  • does not have enough money and still had to pay me back for the vacation, so we dropped the subject. But since we've been gaming alot, my switch is
    via gymgoldie
  • starting to annoy me. The console is slow and it does not have enough capacity to load my games. That's why I decided to buy a ps5. I have more than enough savings to do so. I
    via gymgoldie
  • texted my boyfriend I wanted to buy a ps5 later that day and I did. Now my boyfriend's piced cause he wanted to buy a ps5 together. It
    via gymgoldie
  • would take several months before he would have enough savings, which is why I bought it myself. He also asked if the ps5 belonged to the both of us or just me. I responded
    via gymgoldie
  • that the ps5 is mine untill he pays half of it, but he can always play on it if I'm not home. He got upset by this and said he was dissapointed and I am being unreasonable.
    via gymgoldie
  • So, AITA for buying a ps5 without my boyfriend and saying it's mine?
    via gymgoldie
  • Cheezburger Image 10455685888
    via Mikhail Nilov

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Comfortable--Box NTA You've said he can use it and have ownership when he can afford it. I don't see what the problem is. He should be thankful your salary and hard
    via Comfortable--Box
  • work has allowed both of you to enjoy the PS5 sooner than if you waited for him to save. I think he's just insecure about money and probably feels like you just buying a PS5 whilst he's still catching
    via Comfortable--Box
  • up on his debt to you is making him feel inferior. That's a him problem, not a you problem. You're an adult with adult money that you worked hard for and can spend it as you please.
    via Comfortable--Box
  • Maybe you should tell him he can't play on the PS5 until he I can afford it, since he seems so keen to "bite the hand that feeds him".
    via Comfortable--Box
  • loki2002 You've said he can use it and have ownership when he can afford it. I don't see what the problem is. He was never going to pay for half of it but wants the ownership stake.
    via loki2002
  • LisaCabot More like, he wanted her to pay for half, and have dibs on the ps5 when both of them are at home. He its now p ed because its currently her ps5 and she (obviously) has dibs on it when both of them are home.
    via LisaCabot
  • Not sure how they will play at the same time unless they have either 2 tvs in the living room, one tv and one smaller screen, or they play in separate rooms which i dont think its the same as "playing together" (with the current switch she could be sitting next to him while playing, its what i do with my bf).
    via LisaCabot
  • gymgoldie OP We have 2 tv's next to eachother in the living room. One small tv and one with a big screen. He plays on the big screen with his ps4, i play on the small screen with my switch. Hope that clears things up
    via gymgoldie

  • If I'm being completely honest, I believe both the girlfriend and the boyfriend have valid feelings in this issue, and there is no right or wrong. It's not easy being the person who has to rely on another for financial help, and I understand why the boyfriend was upset by his girlfriend's actions. 

    That doesn't mean I approve of the way he dealt with it, but I do think they should have a mature conversation about how they are going to handle similar situations in the future, in a way that wouldn't hurt anyone's feelings.

  • FarrenFlayer89 Only 8months and already living together...who's idea was that? You hurt his fragile masculinity by buying it yourself and he can't lay claim and monopolies it. NTA
    via FarrenFlayer89
  • gymgoldie OP He wanted to move in with me while he was not financially ready yet. We agreed he moved. in and had three months to get his finances together and pay his part of the rent
    via gymgoldie
  • she_SNAPS 20 INFO: what does your boyfriend do? How are household expenses split? 60/40? 70/30? I'm curious to know. The bit about you going to college so you have a well paying job makes me feel like
    via she_SNAPS_20
  • you feel superior to your boyfriend. If you both work hard and have reasonable income, then what does college really have to do with anything? That part is irrelevant. So I question - do you feel superior to your boyfriend because he didn't go to college?
    via she_SNAPS_20
  • With that being said, his reaction to the terms of usage of the console was wack. A better reaction may have resulted in better communication and a compromise. To be living together, 8 months in, you guys
    via she_SNAPS_20
  • should be communicating better. Also... He only gets to play the PS5 when you're not home? Terms aren't very clear in that regard. You're in a relationship and live together. I hope you intend to share more than when you're not home or
    via she_SNAPS_20
  • not playing it (meaning you can play games together). NAH because I get the purchase of the console, but something about the terms of usage and the college bit don't sit well.
    via she_SNAPS_20
  • gymgoldie OP Household expenses are split about 65/35. I don't feel superiour but I wanted to explain why I have alot of savings and he doesn't (yet). We agreed on splitting the bills accordingly
    via gymgoldie
  • Motor_Dark6406 NTA, What a flex. I'm not sure if I'm just blinded by how awesome it is that the console is yours and not an exorbitant gift for the bf that owes you money, like so many of the other stories on here. Keep it yours.
    via Motor_Dark6406
  • gymgoldie OP Haha you made me laugh thank you
    via gymgoldie

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