8-year-old son refuses to accept dad's new fiancée and attempts to sabotage their relationship, leading fiancée to consider canceling the wedding: 'Is it worth it to marry him?’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Mar 13, 2025 5:00 PM EDT

It is beyond proven that parents who get a divorce affect their children's lives for good (and if it's not clear enough, by 'for good' we don't mean in a good way, we mean forever and ever until their last day on earth).

Since the divorce rate is currently somewhere around one in two, there's a 50% chance that you will be able to confirm this claim. No matter how old you were when your parents got divorced, no matter on what terms the divorce happened, and what kind of family you ended up having, all of that stays with you, well into your adult life.

That's why it can't be easy for kids who have watched their parents get divorced to also watch them find new relationships and move on. Even if these relationships turn out to be the best thing that happens to the family, it's still a hard pill to swallow, at least at the beginning.

But does that justify a kid's bad behavior towards the new addition to the family?

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  • The 8-year-old son in the story down below initially didn't have any problems with his dad's new fiancée. At least until the dad's ex-wife, the kid's mom, decided to turn him against his soon-to-be stepmom. 

    In light of his new attitude, the fiancée is having second thoughts about the wedding, and we honestly can't blame her. It's a complicated family dynamic she is marrying into, and if she's not up to it, maybe she should just walk away.

    Keep scrolling to read the full story.

  • 01
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    via jtyler

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    "AITA for cancelling our wedding due to his son and ex-wife behaviour"

    I am 33F, my fiance is 35M, we've been together for 3 years. He is divorced for 5 years and got a son (8y/o)with his ex-wife, who is currently single. Since I love him dearly
    via beauty-1991
  • 03
    like no one before, I tried to love his son and family my wholeheart. When we started our relationship, his ex-wife is in a relationship with somebody but along the way,
    via beauty-1991
  • 04
    they broke up. Until then, my relationship with my fiance started to crumble. His ex-wife attempts to do all she can to get my fiance's attention even to the extent of using their son
    via beauty-1991
  • 05
    against me. His son liked me ever since but he started treating me differently, calling me "fake mom", saying he didn't want us to have a baby; asking his dad all the time, if
    via beauty-1991
  • 06
    he loves him more than me. He started disrespecting me, not listening to what I say, instead asks his dad. At his age, he still wanted to sleep in our bed together, he can't
    via beauty-1991
  • 07
    sleep by himself and when asked to sleep by himself in his own bed he will be crying asking us to call his mom at night. He doesn't want me holding his dad hands,
    via beauty-1991
  • 08
    everytime me and his dad are talking, he intentionally disrupts us and start calling his dad's attention; when he is not noticed quickly, he does complains that his dad only listens to me when for the
    via beauty-1991
  • 09
    whole day, we didn't even have a chance to talk coz he was literally nonstop talking. Believe me, when I say nonstop, he has ADHD. Btw, his son stays with us only
    via beauty-1991
  • 10
    weekends. I love my fiance more than myself, and been trying to understand him, he always says "his just a child", but I am losing my sh now. We are engaged and planning. for wedding but could I really
    via beauty-1991
  • 11
    live with him like this, everytime his son is around, he talks about his mom. I am worried that I won't have peace of mind when I marry
    via beauty-1991
  • 12
    him one day because of his ex- wife and son. Is it worth it to marry him and put up with all of this sh..?
    via beauty-1991
  • 13
    Cheezburger Image 10479097856
    via PeopleImages

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 14
    Intrepid_Parsley_655 You're NTA for questioning whether you should do this. It sounds like you and your fiance need to sit down and figure out how this will work as partners. Is he willing to stop his son from
    via Intrepid_Parsley_655
  • 15
    calling you fake mom? How will he talk to his son about your plans to have a baby? How does your fiancé react when his ex tries to insert herself? His ex isn't the issue here - the issue is what your fiancé will put up with, how he will stand
    via Intrepid_Parsley_655
  • 16
    up for you and prioritize your family unit (this includes his son), and how he will support you in sticking to established boundaries. If he's brushing off your feelings about any of this and won't commit to working through it together, then this isn't the right relationship for you.
    via Intrepid_Parsley_655
  • 17
    Alltheuniformed NTA this is something HE needs to handle & you need to really talk to him & explain your side & how it makes you feel.
    via Alltheuniformed
  • 18
    DnTS90 Lesson 1: Never ever love someone more than yourself. Lesson 2: This is not a relationship for you. He doesn't defend you nor stand up for you enough to make you stay.
    via DnTS90
  • 19
    Lesson 3: Ask yourself: is this the life you want in your present and future? NTA
    via DnTS90
  • 20
    Only_Music_2640 I mean honestly? It kind of sounds like your fiancé is prioritizing himself, not you and definitely not his child. He just wants the issue to go away and thinks you should Sit up and tolerate the
    via Only_Music_2640
  • 21
    disrespect and ab e. I would separate and get your own place until his son is in board with the relationship. The kid should probably be in therapy.
    via Only_Music_2640
  • 22
    darlinginmaine Girl, NTA and run. This won't get better and it doesn't seem that your fiance is doing enough. Also, why would you want to have a baby with a man that is clearly incapable of parenting a child? He's showing you that he's not deserving of you, take the hint.
    via darlinginmaine
  • 23
    shammy_dammy NTA. Time to pump the brakes on any wedding planning. Is there an option of the two of you living separately but close by while you spend time seeing if a couple of years may make a difference in the step kid's behavior?
    via shammy_dammy

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family drama aita bride groom kids mother stepmom reddit story parenting wedding dad family fiancé Reddit married women son parents children Father
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