Woman stumbles upon romantic messages between married mother-in-law and 22-year-old stranger while snooping on her work laptop, wrestles with how to proceed: “I have been spiraling all weekend”

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    I found messages on my MIL/bosses computer that change my entire view of her. What do I do?

    "I realized this was her personal email and I couldn't help myself but to click on it."
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    I listen to two hot takes literally every week and this happened to me a couple days ago. I've been at a loss of what to do so I figured I should finally make a Reddit account and post here.
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    I work at my husbands family business that builds custom homes. I met my MIL when she came into the design firm I worked at to pick out some options for a client. She and I hit it off and after she'd come
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    in a few times she set me up with her son. Fast forward 7 years and I coordinate all the builds and consult with clients on design for the 50+ year old family business.
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    Cheezburger Image 10479864064
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    My MIL is technically my boss but we operate a lot like equals and she's been taking some steps back. She and I have always gotten along great and she has felt like the mother I never got to have growing up.
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    So last Friday I was packing up to go home and on the phone with my husband before he got a flight for an annual weekend away with friends. I was distracted and accidentally grabbed my MILS
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    computer instead of mine. I didn't realize it until I was home and wanted to look up some fixtures for a project in our own house. Once I knew I texted her to let her know to which she said no worries, she was 'unplugging' this weekend anyway and to do whatever I needed on it.
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    te
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    I was just browsing and unintentionally clicked on a linked email on a stores contact page. We use MacBooks and as a lot of Apple users know, that will usually pop up to send an email using your default. mail app. I closed the draft and when i went to close
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    her email app I saw an email from a recently hired apprentice titled 'our weekend getaway itinerary'. I froze. I realized this was her personal email and I couldn't help myself but to click on it. I found both
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    explicit and romantic messages between this 22 year old male apprentice and my married 47 year old mother-in-law and boss. I slammed the computer shut and just went to bed, staring at the ceiling for quite a while.
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    My husband was gone all weekend and only got home today. I had been spiraling all weekend on how to handle this. I certainly wasn't going to bring it up to my husband while he was gone. But I went to the office and had to see my MIL yesterday and
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    could barely keep my composure. I found every excuse to lock myself away in my office and be busy. So now my husband is back and I'm wondering what to do, do I tell him, how do I even do that, do I go to his mom and confront her, do I go to his dad and tell him, help?!
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    macehood If you're going to tell your husband, bring proof.
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    snafe_ Screenshot everything. If you're tech savvy enough SS on the laptop, open a private browser to email them to yourself, delete the SSs and delete them from the trash. Otherwise, just use your phone to take pics.
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    Tell your husband, he's going to know something is off with you and you'll worry yourself sick if you don't tell him. Is there a chance your MIL & FIL have an open relationship?
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    Your options would be to hire a Private Detective, or inform the MIL and get to come clean, or inform the FIL so he can decide how to move forward, Or do nothing.
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    InstructionTimely640 OP There's no chance they have an open relationship, my FIL was cheated on in a serious relationship with someone he thought he would marry and it crushed him. He has always preached loyalty and monogamy in relationships to my husband since he was a teen.
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    Any-Expression2246 Tell and everything blows up. Don't tell, and husband finds out you knew, everything blows up. Those are your choices.
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    markofcontroversy If you decide to tell, do it right away. I'd you decide not to tell, keep it to yourself forever. There is no middle ground between these two where you don't look like a bad guy.
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    potvoy This! It's rough because if this was just her boss, the obvious answer would be to leave it alone. This is one more reason why mixing family and business can be messy.
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    Visual Escapes Agreed. Either you only potentially blow up your in laws marriage by truth or blow up your own marriage and there's by lying and keeping it to yourself.
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    She's going to get caught eventually they always do. Self preservation would tell you to tell hubby. Save your marriage.
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    ellensundies You didn't see anything. You didn't even open the computer. You have no idea what your MIL does in her time off.
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    Cheezburger Image 10479864320
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    HimylittleChickadee Seriously. I wouldn't touch this with a 10 ft pole
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    nicearthur32 Normally I wouldn't side with this. But this directly involves her livelihood. I would forget I ever saw anything.
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    Unusual-Vanilla-8599 This is one of those times you mind your own business... I don't want to be brash but you were snooping. If it needs to come out it will without your help.
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    logaruski73 If you hadn't opened up her personal email, you wouldn't know. You snooped. You were wrong to do so. Mind your own business and stay out of other peoples emails. This is not going to end well. Forget it and Keep your mouth closed.

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