Husband demands wife pay $8000 in rent and utilities for a house he kicked her out of, claims it’s only his: 'This man takes financial advantage of you'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Mar 17, 2025 4:00 PM EDT

When you get married, there are a few things you tend to combine. Your schedules, your beds, and in most cases, your living situation. It's generally assumed that if you get married, you probably want to live with your partner. Unless you're in a Frida Kahlo/ Diego Rivera situation where you have separate houses that adjoin. But most of us shack up with our ball and chains. It's part of the deal. And if you're lucky, you might decide to go in on a house together, so you can have a shared space that is truly your own.

But what happens when the relationship goes sour? Who gets to stay in your place and who gets kicked to the curb? There's no hard and fast rule to this, so it's no wonder that conflict tends to arise. Like in this story, where a couple on the rocks had disagreements over their living situation.

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    Cheezburger Image 10481449728
    via Unsplash+ (Kateryna Hliznitsova)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • The wife in this story, though, was left scratching her head and feeling guilty when her soon-to-be ex-husband demanded she pay utilities and rent on a place she was no longer welcome to enter. So she took to the internet for advice, which it provided in spades. 

  • 02

    AITA for not paying half the rent?

    So, my husband and I decided (it was actually mostly him telling me, I didn't have a choice) that it would be best if we didn't live together for the time being because we were fighting almost constantly and couldn't see eye to eye on anything.
    via u/mstrishamc
  • 03
    He said to try and save our relationship, maybe we should try living apart. Ive been staying with my dad for the last 6 weeks, and he's been staying at the house.
    via u/mstrishamc
  • 04
    To be clear, we lived in a rented house together a year ago, and he told me he had a great opportunity for home ownership, basically suckered me into moving into this new house. The house is in his name, and his alone. There isn't any sort of agreement on the side for me to pay rent, tenants rights etc. His name is on this house solely, and I just gave him money every month. Half the mortgage, and I pay all of the bills. Yes, I know, stupid on my part.
    via u/mstrishamc
  • 05
    So this is his house. Not mine. Not ours. His. Well I've been with my dad for the last 6 weeks. We have 3 kids together. I pick them up from school, drive across the city to my dads, and he picks them up around 8pm, takes them home, gets them into bed, and takes them to school the next day. He's been very vocal about how that
    via u/mstrishamc
  • 06
    is HIS house, and I thought I was only going to be at my dad's temporarily and that I'd be moving back there. It's been 6 weeks now with no sign of me ever being able to move back. All he says is "I can come back when the time is right".
    via u/mstrishamc
  • 07
    I was kicked out the first week of February. I paid half the rent on Feb 1. I also paid all of the bills for the house (because the electricity, water, heat, cable, internet are all in my sole name) on Feb 15. Then on March 1 I again paid half the rent. On March 20 I have to pay all the bills again. He's also expecting half the rent for April 1st. So that's 3 rounds of rent paid
    via u/mstrishamc
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    when I'm not living there. That's $6000. 2 rounds of bills paid when I'm not living there is $2000. That's $8000 I'm spending on a house to not even live in. If he wanted me back living there, I would be by now. It's been weeks. I can't afford to keep dumping money into a house I do not live in. A house he's made loud and clear is his and his alone.
    via u/mstrishamc
  • 09
    I'm broke from spending everything on that house. I can't afford to move out on my own. My debt is piling up. But I'm scared to tell him I'm done paying for a house I'm not living in, because I'm scared he will just end it for good. I know I'm an idiot and fully stupid for thinking this way. I don't even know WHY I'm thinking this. I don't live there, I shouldn't be paying. Plain and simple. AITA for thinking this? How would you go about this situation?
    via u/mstrishamc
  • 10
    Cheezburger Image 10481449984
    via Unsplash+ (Kateryna Hliznitsova)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 11

    Commenters weighed in with their opinions.

    November-8485 4h ago • If he leaves you for not being able to afford to contribute to a home he says isn't yours and doesn't want you in, have you really lost anything?
    via u/November-8485
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    Andreiisnthere • 4h ago Also get the utilities out of your name. If the kids don't need the internet, cancel it
    via u/Andreiisnthere
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    Nester1953. 4h ago I'm so confused. it isn't your house. You've been kicked out of the house. What on earth possessed you to continue to pay one red cent for that house? And why, when you were living there, were you paying such an inequitable amount? This man takes financial advantage of you to such an alarming and obvious extent -- why have you allowed yourself to be victimized? Stop it!
    via u/Nester1953
  • 14
    NTA. Go talk with a lawyer. How much do I hope you live in a jurisdiction that recognizes common law marriage?
    via u/Nester1953
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    • sdgeycs 4h ago If that house was bought during your marriage and you didn't sign anything waving your right to the house before it was bought you have a claim to that house. You need a lawyer.
    via u/sdgeycs
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    bannana 4h ago He's gonna have a little surprise if you get divorced and finds out that house is actually half yours. Gather all of your receipts so you can show where you gave him money and that you were paying utilities as well. It's. almost certain that house isn't solely his it's joint property in your marriage.
    via u/bannana
  • 17
    Livs_Freely • 4h ago NTA. You shouldn't have paid March and definitely shouldn't pay April. It's HIS house, so HE should be able to afford it on his own. No real husband tells his wife that the house is only his. The marriage is over, honey. I'd just start preparing to get a jump on custody.
    via u/Livs_Freely
  • 18
    jadepumpkin1984 • 4h ago Nta. But the marriage is over. Use the rent money on a lawyer.
    via u/jadepumpkin1984
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    lizbaby42 4h ago Any assets or debts acquired during the marriage belong equally to both spouses, regardless of whose name is on the title or deed. So, if you've been married and have contributed to the growth of a business or home, you have a rightful claim to a portion of its value, even if it's not in your name.
    via u/lizbaby42
  • 20
    You can force his hand to make a decision about you moving back in, by not paying anything since you are not living in the house, but do you want to? Sounds like your marriage is over. NTA, but your husband is. Your poor children!
    via u/lizbaby42
  • 21
    Medical-Excuse7963 • 4h ago So, if you haven't already, please book an appointment with a divorce attorney and a therapist. You need to protect yourself, and your children, from this toxic relationship. He is the boss and you are an ATM. This is unhealthy for you, the kids, him.
    via u/Medical-Excuse7963
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    NarwhalsAreCool20 4h ago You need to ask for you money back, you don't live there, you did use any of the utilities. Turn them off & let him get them in his name for his house.
    via u/NarwhalsAreCool20
  • 23
    Accomplished_Two1611 . 4h ago He ended it when he chose to treat you like a boarder that he has kids with. See a lawyer and determine your next step.NTA.
    via u/Accomplished_Two1611
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    Pale-Jello3812 • 4h ago NTA. You are not there why should you be paying the rent/mortgage or the monthly bill's thats his problem. If you are not going back cut them off.
    via u/Pale-Jello3812
  • 25
    Agreeable-Book-7018 4h ago YTA for continuing to support him. He's got a girl on the side. It's already over. Stop paying anything
    via u/Agreeable-Book-7018
  • 26
    Ccampbell1977 4h ago If he bought the house while you two were married it is half yours. In the state of TN at least. But he's not working on things. It seems done. Quit paying the bills. You can live there and he can leave. I think you should get stronger and not take his sh. He's taking advantage of you.
    via u/Ccampbell1977

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long term relationship relationship advice healthy marriage aita relationship marriage relationship status relationship-drama reddit story marriage-drama relationships story reddit thread Reddit healthy relationship
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