Motherhood Unplugged: 26 Painfully True Sayings About Being a Mom

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  • 01
    Text - IT TAKES YOGIS YEARS OF MEDITATION TO ATTAIN THE LEVEL OF FOCUS A MOM HAS WHILE CUTTING HER CHILD'S NAILS mommiepoppins FACEBOOK.COM/M0 MMIEPOPPINS
  • 02
    Cartoon - MY PARENTING PHILOSOPHY IS DOING THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT MY MOTHER-IN-LAW SAYS mommiepoppins FACEBOOK.COM/MO MMIEPOPPINS I
  • 03
    Cartoon - THE FIRST YEAR OF MOTHERHOOD IS NO DIFFERENT THAN BEING A COW mommiepoppins FACEBOOK.COM/M0 MMIEPOPPINS
  • 04
    Cartoon - IF ANY OF YOUR FRIENDS EVER SAY THEY WOULD LOVE TO BABYSIT.. GET THAT SHIT IN WRITING AND HAVE IT SIGNED WITH THEIR BLOOD mommiepoppins FACEBOOK.COM/M0 MMIEPOPPINS
  • 05
    Cartoon - WANT TO MAKE AN ATHEIST BELIEVE IN GOD? GIVE HIM A CRYING BABY AND NO PACIFIER mommiepoppins FACEBOOK.COM/M0 MMIEPOPPINS
  • 06
    Product - IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU HAD A'NATURAL DELIVERY SAY NO-THE SKY SPLIT INTO TWO AND THE GODS HAND DELIVERED MY BABY ON A BASKET OF CLOUDS mommiepoppins FACEBOOK.COM/MO MMIEPOPPINS
  • 07
    Cartoon - REMEMBER THAT FEELING OF GETTING EIGHT HOURS OF UNINTERRUPTED STRESS FREE SLEEP? YEAH, ME NEITHER mommiepoppins FACEBOOK.COM/MO MMIEPOPPINS I
  • 08
    Text - FOR THE MONTHS AM PREGNANT WITH A BOY SHOULDN'TI BE PAID 178 TIMES MY SALARY mommiepoppins FACEBOOK.COM/MOMMIEPOPPINS
  • 09
    Text - WHEN MY HUSBAND FALLS SICK I AM 2% EMPATHETIC AND 98% SUSPICIOUS HE IS JUST FAKING IT TO GET OUT OF BABY DUTIES mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MO MMIEPICKLES Omeghnashah TATTHUITITITUTUUUU1
  • 10
    Text - IF THE BABY CAN HEAR EVERYTHING INSIDE THE BELLY THEN AM PRETTY SURE HIS FIRST WORD IS GOING TO BE F*CK mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MO MMIEPICKLES Omeghnashah
  • 11
    Cartoon - WHEN PEOPLE CONGRATULATE ME 11ΚΤΟ SAY FOR WHAT AND THEN WATCH THEM FREAK OUT mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MOMMIEPICKLES Omeghnashah
  • 12
    Text - PEEING ON A STICK AND PRESERVING THAT STICK IS THE START OF THE MANY DISGUSTING THINGS YOU WILL DO AS A MOTHER mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MO MMIEPICKLES Omeghnashah
  • 13
    Cartoon - JUICE COMPANIES COULD SAVE SO MUCH SS ON NEW FLAVORS IF THEY KNEW THAT THEIR JUICE TASTED DIFFERENT IN A BLUE GLASS VS. A GREEN GLASS mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MOMMIEPICKLES Omeghnashah TILITITHTITIIT TTm
  • 14
    Cartoon - 80% OF PARENTING IS ASKING ALEXA WHAT SONG te TO PLAY NEXT mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MOMMIEPICKLES Omeghnashah E& TOTTRUITIIITUUUT
  • 15
    Cartoon - PARENTING IS A LIFE LONG TREASURE HUNT YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT YOU WILL KEEP VRAPN FINDING UNDER YOUR COUCH mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MOMM IEPICKLES Omeghnashah
  • 16
    Text - DANCE LIKE NO ONE IS WATCHING PARENT LIKE EVERYONE ON THE PLAYGROUND IS WATCHING mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MO MMIEPICKLES Omeghnashah
  • 17
    Cartoon - THERE ARE THREE STEPS TO PACKING FOR A TRIP WITH A BABY: 1. MAKE A LIST 2. THROW THE LIST RANA 3. PACK THE WHOLE HOUSE mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MOMM IEPICKLES Omeghnashah
  • 18
    Cartoon - THE WORST PART ABOUT APPLYING SUNSCREEN ON YOUR CHILD IS RE-APPLYING SUNSCREEN EVERY 90 MINS mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MOMMIEPICKLES Omeghnashah
  • 19
    Text - LAW #2: THE GREATER THE URGENCY OF AN EVENT, THE MORE FORCE IT WILL VRAPN TAKE TO ACCELERATE THE TODDLER mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MOMMIEPICKLES Omeghnashah
  • 20
    Text - LAW #1: A TODDLER AT REST WILL REMAIN AT REST UNTIL THE IPAD BATTERY RUNS OUT mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MO MMIEPICKLES Omeghnashah E& TILuEu IIIUUTT
  • 21
    Text - WATCHING THE SOLAR ECLIPSE IS LIKE PUTTING A TODDLER TO SLEEP. IF YOU MAKE DIRECT EYE CONTACT THERE WILL BE VRAPN SOME MAJOR IRREVERSTBLE DAMAGE mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MO MMIEPICKLES Omeghnashah
  • 22
    Text - A SOLAR ECLIPSE IS A RARE AND BEAUTIFUL PHENOMENON.. KINDA LIKE THAT ONE TIME MY HUSBAND LOADED THE DISHWASHER WITHOUT ANY HIDDEN AGENDA OR BEING ASKED. mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MO MMIEPICKLES Omeghnashah TILuEu IIIUUTT
  • 23
    Cartoon - THE ONLY THING STANDING BETWEEN ME AND BEING A PARENT IWANT TO BE IS MY CHILD mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MOMM IEPICKLES Omeghnashah
  • 24
    Cartoon - NOTHING RUINS A MARRIAGE LIKE THE LINE GO SEE WHAT MOM IS DOING? mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MOMMIEPICKLES Omeghnashah
  • 25
    Cartoon - ITS IMPORTANT TO ENJOY THE SIMPLE THINGS IN LIFE. AFTER HAVING A KID VRANN ITS ALL YOU CAN AFFORD ANYWAY mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MO MMIEPICKLES Omeghnashah
  • 26
    Text - HAVING A TODDLER WHO IS LEARNING TO SPEAK IS LIKE CONSTANTLY VRAPN PLAYING CHARADES mommiepickles FACEBOOK.COM/MO MMIEPICKLES Omeghnashah

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