‘They said they only needed to stay at my place for 2-3 nights, I want them to leave ASAP’: Two buddies turn a quick couch-crash into an endless takeover, trashing their friend's 1-bedroom apartment and ignoring every house rule

Author image for Etai Eshet
Etai Eshet • Editor
Apr 26, 2025 6:00 AM EDT

We all have pals who think crashing for a couple of nights is a magical phrase that suspends all laws of hospitality, hygiene, and common decency. 

You open your home out of generosity, lending your couch and a bouncy rectangle of air masquerading as a mattress. Next thing you know, your apartment has become a budget hostel with the world's worst Yelp reviews, featuring a bonus cameo by their mystery friend who treats your living room like his personal locker room.

The script is familiar. Promised two or three nights, you now find yourself deep into an unsanctioned squatters' festival. Every morning brings a new excuse for their extended stay: mysterious car trouble, sudden "can't miss" city expeditions, or other sorts of emergencies only cured by another night on your floor.

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  • Meanwhile, your formerly respectable apartment now resembles the aftermath of a home alone sequel: dirty socks hanging on furniture, dirty dishes forming a crust in the sink, ashtrays appearing in unlikely places. They treat weekday nights as an endless music festival and toss building rules to the wind, just to keep the neighbors entertained.

  • "AITA for wanting my friends who are on vacation and staying with me, to leave already?"

    "They are very dirty, and disorganized. my apartment looks like a total mess right now"
    via Tiger Lily

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Friendship may mean opening your home, but it does not require volunteering as head counselor at Camp Disrespectful. Sometimes the best gift you can give yourself and your guests is a one-way ticket to Airbnb.

  • I have a friend (M30) and his buddy (M26) who are staying with me (M33) while they are on vacation. My friend told me they needed a place to stay while in town, so I offered my 1-bedroom apartment (so I technically
    via SundayValleyDream
  • offered them a couch and an inflatable mattress). I have known my friend for around 5 years, but were only close for 3 of those years. I don't know the friend he brought along.
    via SundayValleyDream
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    via Ketut Subiyanto

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Now, AITA for wanting them to leave ASAP? They said they only needed to stay at my place for 2- 3 nights, but now it's 5 nights and counting. I asked them an exact
    via SundayValleyDream
  • date, and somehow things just keep happening so they keep extending (car problems, they booked an excursion, etc). They are very dirty, and disorganized. I
    via SundayValleyDream
  • am usually a tidy person and my apartment looks like a total mess right now (dirty socks on the floor, dirty dishes everywhere, ashtray). They also stay up until
    via SundayValleyDream
  • Cheezburger Image 10498237184
    via Pressmaster

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 2am or so despite being a weekday, and I am not on vacation (they are though). They are loud around my building (mostly families and elderly
    via SundayValleyDream
  • residents) and don't respect the rules (playing basketball in the pool area, walking around the lobby shirtless). I am just tired of
    via SundayValleyDream
  • being a tour guide, plus all the stress of having them in my home. I have barely slept, feel tired all day long and have not been productive at all since they arrived. They have been paying
    via SundayValleyDream
  • for lunches, dinners, etc so they are being very generous, but I still don't think that outweighs the discomfort and stress I feel. I just don't want to be an a h le with them, but I'm close to reaching my limit.
    via SundayValleyDream
  • What should I do?
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  • TeenySod ΝΤΑ Tactful approach: "I know it's not your fault you've had to stay longer than you thought, I need to get back into my normal routine as spending time with you is unfortunately affecting my work and I can't take any time off. I
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  • really appreciate you paying for food and we've had some fun trips out, I need you to leave tomorrow, and can help you find a hotel/AirBnB today if your car isn't ready yet."
    via TeenySod
  • They are taking the . Car breakdown = not their fault/emergency/need to stay extra, let 'em have that one. Booking extra excursions is totally deliberate.
    via TeenySod
  • If ^ that doesn't work, then time to get tougher, and sadly you may have to be prepared for the friendship to end over it
    via TeenySod
  • TrashPandaLJTAR NTA. Car problems? Out of their control. Excursions? Entirely in their control. "I'm sorry, I've loved having you visit and it's been fantastic but I'm not on holidays and this is starting to impact on my working life. You'll need to go home tomorrow".
    via TrashPandaLJTAR
  • Don't offer to help them. Don't offer to figure things out. Just set the line in the sand and then take a big sigh of relief.
    via TrashPandaLJTAR
  • modmom1111 Speak with them directly and with conviction and tell them that your hospitality has ended. You agreed to 2- 3 days and have gone past that. NTA
    via modmom1111
  • disabledandpissed Tell them they have to go because you have another coming to stay-...your sanity
    via disbleandpied
  • Traditional-Bag ΝΤΑ Your home is not a hotel. Trashing your home and disrespect of your neighbors is not acceptable.
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  • Tell them immediately they must clean up your home & leave.
    via Traditional-Bag

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boyfriend friendship guests bad friend 1-bedroom move in houseguests best friends hosting friends girlfriend friend mean girls Party staying over vacation
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