Boyfriend moves mother-in-law's expensive birthday cake away from 2-year-old nephew who was sticking his hands into it, prompts massive tantrum from the toddler: 'Everyone glared at me like I was evil and rushed to placate the kid'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
May 5, 2025 8:00 PM EDT

Everyone has a different theory for dealing with crazy toddlers. If you don't have kids, you probably don't know just how easy it is to make them scream, cry, and sob about the simplest things, derailing whatever you're doing for at least 30 minutes, if not more. Parents have to take a different approach with toddlers than they would with older kids because they can walk and talk, but cannot regulate their emotions for the life of them. You're much more likely to let "bad behavior" slide with toddlers because they don't know better and won't do what you tell them. Many parents would rather prevent a tantrum than discipline their children for doing something slightly socially unacceptable that isn't outright harmful. If a toddler is putting themselves or others in danger, parents need to step in, but if they're only slightly annoying, it's usually best to leave it alone.

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  • This situation is extremely borderline because you can totally see where every party is coming from. This boyfriend was just trying to protect his girlfriend's mom's birthday cake from getting contaminated by a 2-year-old, but his doubling down on this goal made everyone in his girlfriend's family angry at him. 

  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10502171904
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    AITA for moving someone else's birthday cake out of reach of an entitled toddler?

    I was just at my girlfriend's mom's birthday party. We'd ordered an expensive cake for her and split the cost three ways with her sisters.
    via u/Reno_Potato
  • 03
    Her brother, who never contributes to any of the shared presents, brought his spoiled 2 year old kid. While everyone was singing Happy Birthday, the kid started sticking his hands into the cake and licking them, and picking off the decorations. I looked around
    via u/Reno_Potato
  • 04
    in horror but her brother and his wife were just smiling at this like it was the absolute cutest thing ever, and everyone else was totally unfazed and said nothing. I bit my tongue and didn't say anything either, but..... I reached over and moved the cake a few inches out of reach of the kid.
    via u/Reno_Potato
  • 05
    Immediately the kid started thrashing around and screaming murder. Everyone glared at me like I was the most evil POS on earth for doing what I did and rushed to placate the kid, "awwh you poor little thing"-ing and giving him cake.
    via u/Reno_Potato
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    Cheezburger Image 10502172160
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 07
    I doubled down and calmly, rationally said what the kid was doing was incredibly unhygienic, it wasn't his birthday cake and he's old enough to be taught to wait literally one minute until he gets a slice of cake instead of destroying someone else's birthday cake and covering it with his germs.
    via u/Reno_Potato
  • 08
    Now I'm being made out to be a huge a hole for doing/saying this, and I "ruined the birthday party". Considering it's the entire family's reaction, it's making me start to question whether or not I am just a grumpy a h le.
    via u/Reno_Potato
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    Cheezburger Image 10502172416
    via A. C. (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.


     

  • 10
    OneCraftyBird Ooooo000000ooh this is the ghost of Christmas future talking now. This is every birthday party, every cookout, every reception for the rest of your life. If you have 100% buy in from your girlfriend, then your child will not be a monster, but they will quite rationally have questions about why their cousins get away with everything. If your girlfriend was part of the group that piled on, you will be utterly alone for the rest of your life in believing in standards. But it's not too
    via u/OneCraftyBird
  • 11
    Reno Potato OP I don't know whether to laugh my a off or cry at this :P Luckily my gf supports me and we're 1000% on the same page when it comes to parenting, but she's the youngest and just bites her tongue rather than go against her family. Unfortunately sometimes I can't :( But even if she says anything she just gets quashed by her brother. They're oldskool country folk so he has more authority because he's a man. It off to no end but they're not going to change. me
    via u/Reno_Potato
  • 12
    OneCraftyBird Grin, I'm glad you laughed, and hey, there's a price to be paid for a relationship with anyone. This is the price for being with her. She could very well be worth it and you two can always move really far away and be too busy to visit until she goes through detox.
    via u/OneCraftyBird
  • 13
    Reno Potato OP She is definitely worth it, even if I had to eat cake regurgitated by a toddler every day for the rest of my life.
    via u/Reno_Potato
  • 14
    AikoG84 Oooo you're a male? And not part of the family? Play into that old skool man mentality snd challenge him every chancd you get. It'll drive him crazy. I'm not even male and i f with my cousins/uncles like this. Challenging his masculinity is the worst thing you can do to him. They are trainable too. At this point they mostly behave when i'm around XD
    via u/AikoG84
  • 15
    Reno Potato OP LOL, I'll keep that in mind. I'm open to examples though ;) I'm not sure how susceptible he is to it though. I literally do every bit of maintenance and renovation and physical labor around his family's house. If something is leaking/broken/whatever he'll just continue to use it/not use it until I come along to fix it. And he's never once said something like "hey man, thanks for redoing my parents' bathroom" because he just takes it for granted that everyone is there to serve him.
    via u/Reno_Potato
  • 16
    DrPetradish I'm not sure I could continue to do maintenance for them in the face of all this. I'd have to take a big step back from the family.
    via u/DrPetradish
  • 17
    Reno Potato OP I am trying, yet I need to totally reprogram my brain for that. I'm literally the guy who, while picking up a date on Friday (who was living with her parents) noticed the roof was leaking and spent the entire weekend after the date fixing their roof.
    via u/Reno_Potato
  • 18
    It's painfully difficult for me to walk by something that I have the capability of fixing and just ignore it, even if it's for complete strangers. But yes, I do realize if doing hundreds of hours of free skilled labor on their house doesn't entitle me to move a cake 2 inches then I'm being taken advantage of.
    via u/Reno_Potato
  • 19
    Sparklie-Sarah Maybe decide on a child free wedding!!
    via u/Sparklie-Sarah
  • 20
    madra_crainn YTA, although it pains me to say so because you are correct. At a gathering of someone else's family in their own house, they are ones who decide if they are cool with a toddler's behavior or not. To break it down, You're not the a-h_e for moving the cake - tons of people would have moved that cake on instinct. I would not even fault someone for saying "oh sorry, I reacted quickly by moving the cake because I didn't know if you were worried about little Ebenezer getting messy" and t
    via u/madra_crainn
  • 21
    You're a bit of an a-h e for explaining to them about germs, read the room, obviously they think it's cute and don't care that it's gross (which it is). It's a higher level of a-he behavior for framing your comments about the kid being "spoiled" and should be old enough to know better and behave differently. The kid is 2, it's not your kid, they might be spoiled or they might not, but either way, your two cents are not needed and not appreciated. Also, no parent ever has adjusted their parenting
    via u/madra_crainn
  • 22
    You would not be an a-he for simply declining a piece of cake (without comment) when it was passed around. To paraphrase you, it's not your birthday cake and you're old enough to know that you can always stop on the way home and get a snack if you want dessert.
    via u/madra_crainn
  • 23
    Enough-Process9773 This is the comment I was looking for - a very gentle YTA, u/Reno_Potato Yes, you brought the birthday cake, but it was a present, so once handed over, it belongs to the person you gave it to. You are in no way the a-he for moving the cake out of the reach of the toddler - I would have done that too!
    via u/Enough-Process9773
  • 24
    But it's quite clear that toddler's parents Do Not Do The Thing of removing a screaming toddler in a meltdown because the THING THE TODDLER WANTS is now out of reach - they just leave the toddler right there to have a screaming meltdown and spoil everyone's peace, and it is entirely possible that the person to whom the cake now belonged, your girlfriend's mother, felt that not being able to eat the germy, spoiled cake was a very small price to pay to have that noisy toddler quiet for once - even
    via u/Enough-Process9773
  • 25
    toddler's parents are Also, in all seriousness: it is entirely possible the , BUT not because the toddler is spoiled and grabs everything and has a screaming meltdown when frustrated. That's not how spoiled toddlers behave. That's how all toddlers behave - at least some of the time. A parents' job is to teach them boundaries and help them calm down when they have a meltdown about not being able to reach the thing they want. I would have picked him up, carried him out of the room, and sat down qu
    via u/Enough-Process9773

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cake boyfriend family drama toddler kids birthday toddlers parenting girlfriend little kids mother in law family birthday cake Parenting Fail parents children
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