37-year-old woman finds out younger neighbor dated her husband while they were married, younger neighbor proves it to her with Bumble messages: “I don’t appreciate you lying about my husband”

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
May 9, 2025 12:00 PM EDT

Welcome back ladies and gentlemen of the internet. The worst part about lying is that once you lie about something really significant, the other person involved will forever have that slight doubt about everything you do and say after. Lying sticks to you, you end up questioning everything. Even if someone really tries to win back your trust and make it up to you, there's no knowing if they're still just lying. Since they lied once, they'll lie again. I've tried before in relationships to make things work after lies, deceit, or even significant betrayals, but it never works in the end. Your partner never has a reason to lie to you, and resentment builds so easily after that first lie. It becomes a web of guilt, betrayal, paranoia, and fighting. 

In the story below, the protagonist is a woman who doesn't want to beat around the bush when she sees something is wrong. She befriends a woman next door to her, only to later realize that the woman's husband is a man she went on a few dates with a year prior. The timeline is pretty straightforward, but he tries to warp his wife's opinion, despite written evidence. Read the full story below for all the juicy details. 

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  • 01

    AITH for telling my neighbor I dated her husband?

    Cheezburger Image 10503072000
    via studioroman / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    I (33F) became friendly with my neighbor (37F) let's call her Emily, after I helped her move a few boxes into our building while her husband (35M) was in the hospital. I didn't meet Emily's husband until a few weeks later when she invited
    via u/thekatsmeow1219
  • 03
    me over to dinner as thanks. When I arrived first, Emily's husband had run out to pickup some wine but when he came back I was shocked to see "Matt"- a guy I had gone on 3 dates with a year ago before he suddenly ghosted me. He had a terrible poker face and tried to pretend like he didn't recognize me. I don't play those games.
    via u/thekatsmeow1219
  • 04
    I asked how long they had been married and Emily said "3 years!" She recognized there was tension and asked if we knew each other. He said no. I said yes and told Emily that I had gone on dates with him a year ago. She became very upset and asked me to leave, which
    via u/thekatsmeow1219
  • 05
    I did. The next day, Emily reached out and said that she didn't appreciate that I lied about when I dated her husband. He told her we had dated 4 years ago, before they were married. I didn't even live in this city 4 years ago! And even if we had dated 4 years ago, they had been engaged at that point. Either way, he would've been cheating.
    via u/thekatsmeow1219
  • 06
    I sent her screenshots of our texts from the year before and from Bumble of his profile (which was still active!!) She never responded but when I saw her in the lobby yesterday, she wouldn't even look
    via u/thekatsmeow1219
  • 07
    me in the eye. I don't know if they're still together and Emily hasn't responded to my texts. So AITHA for telling her the truth?
    via u/thekatsmeow1219
  • 08
    [d.... You told her the info she did need to hear, now just let the pieces fall where they will. Do not engage further. NTA. You were being honest. But it's best to leave her alone now.
    via Reddit
  • 09
    thekatsmeow1... OP Update, Emily just stopped by! We had a quick chat but she let me know that she's kicked Matt out and she thanked me for telling the truth. She also found out that I was not the only person he dated while
    via u/thekatsmeow1
  • 10
    they were married. Giving her space now but wanted to share an update since it happened so quickly after posting.
    via u/thekatsmeow1
  • 11
    That Cranberry 1939 if I was Emily I would probably ask you to leave too because I wouldn't want you to witness me screaming at my cheating dirtbag of a husband. NTA you did the right thing.
    via u/That Cranberry 1939
  • 12
    Cheezburger Image 10503071488
    via arinahabich from Getty Images / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 13
    I just saw your update where she came and thanked you - hopefully that gives you some peace. I like people like you. no games, straight up, honest and dignified.
    via u/That Cranberry 1939
  • 14
    Responsible-Side4... He knew the risks. He got caught. Its not on you your not there to condone his actions.
    via u/Responsible-Side4347
  • 15
    darkangelsqueen No, you just wanted to tell the woman that it her husband's cheating. Her problem, if she doesn't believe you.
    via u/darkangelsqueen
  • 16
    Lanky_Explanation... NTA, he f ed around and it came back in his face, she needed to know but be prepared if she doesn't want anything to do with u but she also might come to realize it wasn't ur fault
    via u/Lanky_Explanation
  • 17
    Khabuem NTA. Emily is understandably upset, so don't expect any sort of followup, but you were right to tell her the truth.
    via u/Khabuem
  • 18
    Srvntgrrl_789 NTA. She needed to know her hubby is a cheating AH. She's shooting the messenger by being r de/avoiding you. That's on her, not you. Maybe she'll finally grow up one day and thank you for your honesty.
    via u/Srvntgrrl_789
  • 19
    Cheezburger Image 10503071744
    via bauhaus1000 from Getty Images Signature / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 20
    EnvironmentalGro... NTA, she's just in denial. You did the right thing now just let her work it out lol
    via u/EnvironmentalGroup15
  • 21
    Pristine Ad5229 NTA she's upset and taking it out on you. Kudos to you for not hiding. anything
    via u/Pristine Ad5229
  • 22
    Dismal_Bet_3439 NTA she deserved to know. He obviously has a serious issue and this was not a one time thing. It would have continued and she would have spent most of her adult
    via u/Dismal_Bet_3439
  • 23
    life with a cheater. I would have wanted to know regardless of how much it hurt.
    via u/Dismal_Bet_3439

Tags

neighbors drama toxic neighborhood-drama relationships lol love family reddit thread Bad Neighbor Reddit funny dating
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