17-year-old tells her 9-year-old foster sister that she ruined Mother's Day: 'She completely ruined Mother’s Day for us by clinging to my mom'

Blended families and the complex interpersonal relationships they create are difficult enough to navigate as it is, but we usually think of blended families as being formed through marriages where each or one of the parties involved already has their own children from a previous relationship, or has otherwise taken on to help care for a child from within the family.

Fostering, on the other hand, is introducing a probably unknown child into the mix of the family. You're doing the right thing, ethically, for certain, but you also need to consider your circumstances and the impact on your own children and the existing family dynamic. It's not something to idealize or gloss over either… Inviting an unknown child into your home, especially without understanding their past and the effects it's having on them, can light a powder keg on the relationships in the home.

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"AITA for telling my foster sister she ruined Mother’s Day"

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In this instance, this 17-year-old is clearly struggling with the new dynamic that has been thrust upon her. While at 17 years old, she should be learning to control her emotions, it's understandable that she is finding it hard to share with her mother on Mother's Day, particularly when the younger girl is demanding most of her mother's attention on the day. Ultimately, I think, this falls to the parents to make sure they're managing the situation carefully and thoughtfully, and, well, there probably should have been some deeper conversations had sooner.
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