38-year-old woman forced to pay alimony to cheating ex-husband for his affair baby despite refusing to have kids with him: “It feels like I’m being punished for not wanting kids”

Author image for Briana Viser
Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
May 22, 2025 12:00 PM EDT

Welcome back internet people of the universe. Money plays a necessary evil in everyone's life. Though we may strive to detach ourselves from the shackles of money and assets, in the end, our lucrative situation will dictate many aspects of our happiness and opportunities in life. Of course, when someone lives on either extreme of a monetary spectrum, the person is never happy in their situation. Being poor means that you might not have a good home to live in, enough food to eat, or opportunities to make your life better with education or certifications. It keeps one stuck in a loop of poverty. Having billions also has its slew of issues. People who make that kind of money aren't happy either. They live everyday to a luxurious standard, but they tend to lack real relationships in their life, and their minds are so distorted that finding love becomes nearly impossible. 

In the story below, it centers around relationships and money. The protagonist is a woman whose ex-husband is a piece of work. He had a two year affair on her, and even had an affair baby. Now he's running her dry off of alimony because she was the breadwinner. Read the full story below for all the juicy details. 

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  • 01

    AITA for telling my sister I resent paying alimony to my ex, knowing he’s using it to indirectly support the child he had during our marriage?

    Cheezburger Image 10507926784
    via BGStock72 / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    I (38F) divorced my ex-husband (41M) last year after discovering he had a two-year-long affair with a woman from his gym. We didn't have kids together and I am childfree. He had a baby on me about 2 years ago. I found out everything about affair, the baby.
    via u/throwra-babyqy

  • This man sounds cruel for so many reasons. Not only did he ruthlessly cheat on his wife for years, but he's trying to keep the mistreatment going for eternity. You would think that since he's already ruined her life with the cheating and divorce that he'd want to fix things in some way, instead of getting money out of her. 

  • 03
    He confessed after I caught a text on his Apple Watch while he was showering. It was from her, calling him "baby daddy." He said he just couldn't figure out "the right time" to tell me. Which apparently meant never unless | caught him.
    via u/throwra-babyqy
  • 04
    We are divorced now Because | make more money (I work in tech and he's a personal trainer), I was ordered to pay him alimony for three years. Our state is no fault, and I didn't want to drag things out in court, so I didn't contest it. I just wanted to be free.
    via u/throwra-babyqy
  • 05
    He's still with the gym girl. But he hasn't moved in with her because as long as he keeps his own place and stays "technically" single, he gets to keep receiving alimony from me. If he moves in with her, the payments could be reevaluated or even cut off. So he's milking it.
    via u/throwra-babyqy
  • 06
    Cheezburger Image 10507926528
    via Studio4 from Getty Images / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 07
    He spends nights over there, plays house, posts cute little park day pics with her kid, and then retreats back to his little one- bedroom apartment that I'm essentially funding. He doesn't even technically pay child support bec there's no court order
    via u/throwra-babyqy
  • 08
    because they're "together" but it's clear to me he's using the alimony to help support that whole setup. He even laughed in my face about it.
    via u/throwra-babyqy
  • 09
    my money is helping him buy diapers, toys, and post cute baby content on Instagram. It makes me sick. I never wanted kids. Especially not his. And certainly not theirs. But here I am, forced to bankroll a child that only exists because he was a characterless man.
    via u/throwra-babyqy
  • 10
    A few weeks ago, I was venting to my sister over wine, and I said something like, "Every time I send that check, it feels like I'm paying child support for his affair baby." She got stiff and told me that was "vindictive" thing to say. I think a part of my anger is misdirected at the baby, but most of it is on him.
    via u/throwra-babyqy
  • 11
    all feels. I'm left cleaning up a mess I didn't make while he gets to play dad in peace without any real financial consequences.
    via u/throwra-babyqy
  • 12
    I don't see an innocent child I see proof that he got to have everything while I was left humiliated and still paying for it. And maybe part of me wants that kid to grow up knowing their cushy early years were courtesy of their dad's first wife.
    via u/throwra-babyqy
  • 13
    Now I'm spiraling and I needed to get that off my chest with someone I trusted, and now I feel like a monster for even thinking it.
    via u/throwra-babyqy
  • 14
    The hardest part is that I chose to be childfree to protect my peace and preserve the freedom to use my time and money on my terms. I have neither now, at least not for a fault of my own. I hate this. I'd rather pay for my own kid at this point. It feels like I'm being
    via u/throwra-babyqy
  • 15
    punished for not wanting to have his children when he wanted me to. AITA?
    via u/throwra-babyqy
  • 16
    PerspectiveKookie... • 16h ago NTA Feeling resentful about paying alimony is understandable, especially when you think he is
    via u/PerspectiveKookie16
  • 17
    Definition of divorce Eng Divorce The le nt body.
    via Kameleon007 from Getty Images Signature / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 18
    manipulating things to make sure the cash flows as long as possible.
    via u/PerspectiveKookie16
  • 19
    You're divorced & have no children that would extend him being involved in your life. Send the checks with a count down in the memo line 36/36, 35/36, 34/36.... -
    via u/PerspectiveKookie16
  • 20
    But you need to put up blinders about him - no checking his/their social media, no calls or texts, no talking if you run into him, tell mutual friends you need a complete blackout of info pertaining to him, ...
    via u/PerspectiveKookie16
  • 21
    There will be a transition period before you can put your marriage, deceit, divorce...behind you. A therapist would be an appropriate and dedicated place to release these built
    via u/PerspectiveKookie16
  • 22
    up emotions and hopefully allow you to focus on yourself & other positive things.
    via u/PerspectiveKookie16
  • 23
    imazing1 15h ago Three years is a blink. NTA. Live your best life. Think of the alimony as payment for a monthly delousing of your house. Stay off his posts and give a ' I to each check.
    via u/imazing1

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marriage drama toxic relationships lol divorce love family reddit thread Reddit funny money dating
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