Neighbor wants stay at home mother to watch her 3 and 5-year-old kids for free, won't take no for an answer: ' She told me I was selfish'

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Brad Dickson • Managing Editor
Jun 8, 2025 6:00 PM EDT

Childcare is so expensive that it causes many couples to carefully consider whether or not it's worth one spouse quitting their whole career and staying at home in order to take care of the kids and save on the expense. It's a big decision, and considering the cost to that spouse's career and long-term earning potential and the fact that the vast majority of families actually need both those incomes to make ends meet, it's a big sacrifice to make. Of course, if, thanks to family or for some other reason, you're able to get free childcare, then you can circumvent that whole issue. But since the service of watching your children is worth a whole salary, this isn't something to take lightly, even if it's your parents offering to watch their grandchildren.

There's a reason why we see so many stories like this online where someone tries to weasel their way into getting someone to watch their kids for free, gaslighting a sibling, or some other tenuous acquaintance into watching their kids. 
When this homeowner moved into a new neighborhood, she thought a good way to meet people and gain a sense of community would be to join a local "mommy" social media group. The problem is her status as a SAHM attracted the attention of an eager neighbor who was eager to take the chance at free childcare.

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  • 01

    "AITAH For Telling My Neighbor I Have No Desire or Obligation To Babysit Her Children Because I'm A SAHM?"

    I'm new to my area and I have made friends with a few neighbors through a mommy and me group**** I have been in the group now a little over a month and I have a 9 week old. I have a neighbor who is in the group and she asked me last week in an emergency if I could watch her 3 and 5 year old, she looked desperate so I agreed. I was like well its just once. I am a full-time
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    Cheezburger Image 10514635264
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    The image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 03
    SAHM and enjoy all my time with my little one. That day I watched her children was hectic ash I, my daughter was fussy and they children were very rambunctious to say the least. I was happy when she came and got them 6 hours later.
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  • 04
    She came to me today saying she needed me to watch the kids in the afternoons, I told her no. I'm not a fulltime babysitter and have no desire to take that much time away from my own child and navigating life with my child and husband.
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  • 05
    Her response was well its not like I'm asking a lot, its just the afternoons. I said it may not be a lot to her but it is a lot to me. My husband works from home and he needs the house quiet to work, and I'm a new mom and I'm not interested on taking on any other responsibilities other than what I have right now. She told me I was selfish, I told her she was entitled to think that I SHOULD help her just because I'm at home with my little one. AITAH for being so forward?
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  • 06
    Training-Fox2475 • 4h ago H I no NTA! It really gets me anymore how many of these selfish people in the world make a mark on someone just because they see something they could. get from them and just expect it. When they don't get what they want, they always throw out the selfish label and throw a tantrum. What the h l is wrong with people like this?
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  • 07
    Stoney_Wan_KaBI... . 4h ago NTA Must've missed the part where YOU knocked her up twice. Oh, didn't happen? Then not your problem.
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  • 08
    KronkLaSworda • 5h ago NTA Everyone knows how expensive childcare is. She's just trying to take advantage of you and guilt trip you into baby sitting.
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  • 09
    busyshrew ⚫4h ago Absolutely NTA. I was a SAHM, and I remember to this day, getting advice from another SAHM - She warned me that I would be a target for many other moms who would look at me as easy babysitting. OP, stand absolutely firm.
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  • 10
    You and your husband are making sacrifices for you to stay home. It's not easy. I get it I've been there. Friends used to absolutely tut-tut at me because we had no dishwasher, only 1 car, only 1 tv and never took vacations overseas. It was hard but it was our choice.
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  • 11
    You did not choose to open a daycare service, so do not feel bad about saying no. Learn to say it without getting drawn into justifications or reasoning with others. TRUST ME, this won't be the only occasion/person that will ask! You will have to really be firm and stand your ground.
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  • 12
    This situation always makes me so mad. Every family is different and we need to respect each other, not call someone 'selfish' for their choices just because they don't want to accept a 'no'. ugggh. Congratulations btw on your new baby.... ohhhh I remember those days with my daughter very fondly.
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  • 13
    Johnny Rock70 • 4h ago You are a better person than I am. I would've laughed hysterically, shut the door in her face, then I'd have opened it again, just to laugh at her some more, then every time I drove by her in the 'hood, I would rib my partner, point at her and laugh again.
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  • 14
    TararaBoomDA • 4h ago She's both the ah le and the one who's being forward. You, on the other hand, are the GOAT. NTA.
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  • 15
    FrostingPowerful5... 4h ago Just "No" is a sufficient answer. NTA
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  • 16
    Medusa_7898 · 4h ago Def NTA- regular babysitting is a huge responsibility and you weren't looking for a part time job.
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  • 17
    iDreamiPursueiBe... • 4h ago Tell her that you don't have the business license or insurance for that. NTA.
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