Brother’s ex-girlfriend, Lisa, crashes family dinner uninvited, disrupting the evening and forcing the host to intervene and send her home: ‘She’d heard about the dinner from my cousin and decided to "drop by"’

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  • Am I in the wrong for Telling My Brother’s Ex to Leave Our Family Dinner?

    "When Lisa walked in, I was confused"
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  • I (28F) hosted a small family dinner at my place last weekend. It was just my parents, my brother (let's call him Jake), and a couple of close relatives—nothing fancy,
  • just a casual get-together. Everything was going fine until Jake's ex-girlfriend (let's call her Lisa) showed up unannounced.
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  • For context, Jake and Lisa dated for three years and broke up about six months ago after she cheated on him. It was messy,
  • and Jake was really hurt. Since then, he's been trying to move on, and family time has been his safe space.
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  • When Lisa walked in, I was confused at first-I figured maybe Jake had invited her without telling anyone. But the look on his face made it clear that
  • wasn't the case. Turns out, she'd heard about the dinner from my cousin (who didn't realize how awkward it would be) and decided to "drop by."
  • Jake immediately tensed up, and the whole mood shifted. I pulled Lisa aside and said, "Hey, I wasn't expecting you tonight. This is kind
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  • of a family-only thing, and I think it's best if you leave." She got defensive and said, "I just wanted to see everyone. It's not a big
  • deal." I stayed firm and told her, "It is a big deal to Jake, and this isn't the right time." She left, but not without shooting me a dirty look.
  • Afterward, my mom said I handled it well, but my dad thinks I was too harsh. He said Lisa was just trying to be friendly and I
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  • should've let her stay for a bit to avoid drama. Jake thanked me, but now I'm second-guessing if I overreacted.
  • TL;DR: My brother's ex showed up uninvited to a family dinner, and I asked her to leave because it made him uncomfortable. Some family members think I was too harsh. Am I the j ?
  • Dear Chemical_13 Your dad is insensitive to your brother's pain. You did the right thing. I'd gonna step further and tell the person who told her to shut up next time or they aren't invited either.
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  • jCervin No, you did good
  • Fit Zookeeper your dad's giving keep the peace at all costs energy, but sometimes keeping peace means showing ppl the door. you protected your bro, 10/10 move.

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