23-year-old hopeless romantic travels over 800 kilometers to surprise ex-girlfriend during her vacation, backtracks when he realizes that he is not in a rom-com: "I think I watched way too many films"

Author image for Ely Bulnes
Ely Bulnes • Writer and Editor
Jun 23, 2025 5:00 PM EDT

Rom-coms and romantic dramas can truly skew our expectations for love and dating if we take them too seriously. For women, it might set the bar a little too high for a real human man. However, men are also susceptible to the overdramatic narratives presented by Hollywood. If you really think about it, some of the romantic gestures featured in these films would actually come off as weird and creepy if they happened in real life. I mean, how would you feel if your fling showed up at the courthouse to stop your wedding?
In our story today, a young man too hyped on the passion displayed in his favorite romance films decides to make a gesture to his ex-girlfriend that wouldn't be out of place in The Notebook. However, after traveling 500 miles to surprise her, he realizes he has made a huge mistake. Scroll down to get the full story, his reflections, and several internet commenters' takes on the whole thing.

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • 01

    Travelled 800km to "surprise" ex-girlfriend. It has ended terribly

    "I decided to follow my heart and try to make something happen"
    via Creatas Images

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    I am 23-year old guy and broke with my girlfriend in March. She was the one who broke things off despite being in love with me (and me with her, of course) because she felt she was a mess and not
    via u/Luxbrook
  • 03
    able to contribute to this relationship (out of respect for her I won't go deeper into this, but there is a serious background). As difficult as it was, I had to accept that, but both of us left the door open and
    via u/Luxbrook
  • 04
    wanted to re-unite in the future. We stayed in moderate contact following our break-up, nothing too intense, and recently we agreed to meet-up soon to talk about us and everything.
    via u/Luxbrook
  • 05
    Last week she went to a vacation with her sister and friend... I'm not going to try and rationalize what happened next - I decided to follow my heart and try and make something happen. I set upon a
    via u/Luxbrook
  • 06
    Cheezburger Image 10519991040
    via Lifestock

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Oh, no. While this would certainly happen in an early 2000s rom-com, it just comes off as stalkerish and creepy IRL. 

  • 07
    800km journey to surprise her and see if she wants to take a walk, grab a coffee or anything really. I think I watched waay too many films boarded the final bus to my destination, I messaged When I
    via u/Luxbrook
  • 08
    her and revealed my intentions, but to my, (and hers) unpleasanant surprise, she was shocked by this move, said she feels like crp and that she feels like she is SUPPOSED to see me now I'm there.
    via u/Luxbrook
  • 09
    Admittedly, I was blindsided by my emotions and projections, and what I did was absolutely inconsiderate and disrespectful to her feelings, privacy and everything, I had good intentions, but
    via u/Luxbrook
  • 10
    this wasn't a smart decision. She invited me to coffee in her apartment, but I politely declined, since it was evident she was not ready for this and I didn't want to make things any worse than they are.
    via u/Luxbrook
  • 11
    I apologized a couple of times, I truly regret making her feel that way, the fact that I am the source of her sorrow is shredding my heart.
    via u/Luxbrook
  • 12
    I am writing this as I boarded the bus all the way back home. I dreaded this moment and have a lot of negative thoughts on my mind. I flew too close to the sun and lost my wings. I know I have the strenght to pull out of this and, eventually I will.
    via u/Luxbrook

  • This poor, delusional romantic got pretty far before realizing his mistake. If he traveled that far by bus or train, he had plenty of time to reflect beforehand. He must have been seriously daydreaming while wistfully staring out of the window.

  • 13
    Cheezburger Image 10519991552
    via Syda Productions

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 14
    This may sound f ed up, as I truly regret the consequences of this "adventure", but I would do anything for her, and I would start doing it in a second! That's not going to change... So I will raise my chin up and be proud about that, while trying to work on my mistakes.
    via u/Luxbrook
  • 15
    Now it's time to re-focus and re-build. Maybe I am a hopeless romantic, but love takes us to strange, and often unplanned directions. It's not the time (yet) to
    via u/Luxbrook
  • 16
    give up on this dream. People who love you are worth fighting for. But, for now, the ball is on her side of the court, and I hope she passes it back.
    via u/Luxbrook
  • 17
    I know I will probably get judged by the responses, if there will even be any, but this is my story, and I found some clarity by writing this. That alone won't get me over this hill, but it's a beginning.
    via u/Luxbrook
  • 18
    To everyone who got to the ending, thank you for reading this and I wish you nothing but a good, happy life blessed with people you love and cherish. At the end of the day, that's the important thing in adventure that is called life :)
    via u/Luxbrook
  • 19
    Cheezburger Image 10519990528
    via pixelshot

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 20
    libertinauk Making mistakes is part of being human. The way you dealt with it speaks volumes about what a good person you are. This too shall pass.
    via u/libertinauk
  • 21
    Luxbrook OP Thank you for reading and leaving a response! It's much appreciated and it truly honours me that you can see a good side of me, even if we are just online strangers.
    via u/Luxbrook
  • 22
    HunterShotBear "It's not your mistakes that define you, but how you handle them."
    via u/HunterShotBear
  • 23
    Logical-Natural It's really good that you understand her reaction. A "surprise" like that is never a good idea. As you said, it often only accomplishes to create a sense of obligation.
    via u/Logical-Natural
  • 24
    Unfortunately, lots of media are around to convince us otherwise. So - you should be proud of the insight you've gained and your ability to use this experience for the better.
    via u/Logical-Natural
  • 25
    AdDramatic8568 NGL I completely understand her reaction. She wanted to take a trip with her friend and sister and her ex is like btw I'm going to be there. That's the plotline of as many horror movies as romantic ones.
    via u/AdDramatic8568
  • 26
    In the future bear in mind that most people do not like surprises that knock them off kilter, and that part of a loving relationship is being able to wait for another person to be comfortable rather than hounding them when they are away from home.
    via u/AdDramatic8568
  • 27
    WomanInQuestion 80's movies kept telling men that if you just chase her down enough, spam her enough, shout her down with your unfiltered emotions enough, don't let her
    via u/WomanInQuestion
  • 28
    breathe without thinking about you, that women will definitely be worn down to the point that they don't have the energy to fight you anymore and give up trying to, so you "win" and you were obviously right from the beginning.
    via u/WomanInQuestion

Tags

relationship advice break up ex girlfriend romance ex boyfriend relationships exes adulthood boundaries breakup red flag mistake dating hopeless romantic
Scroll Down For The Next Article