‘I feel like I’m constantly being told I’m out of place in my own home’: Recently married woman tells mother-in-law to keep her decorative opinions to herself after an agonizing few months of her critiquing the woman's choices

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
Jul 1, 2025 7:00 PM EDT

When you finally move in with your significant other, it feels like the world is your oyster. Regardless of who makes most of the decorative decisions (cough, cough, YOU), you're just ecstatic that you finally share a roof with your one true love. Sharing the same walls and floors, though, really puts your relationship to the test. Between deciding on "soft ivory" or "eggshell" for the walls and finding out just how difficult using a measuring tape is, you also have people in your ear trying to tell you how to make your house a home.

The woman who posted this next story is struggling to find peace after her mother-in-law unwarrantedly criticized her decor choices more than once. The woman also explains that her husband is failing to stick by her side and defend her from his mother's wrath.

Commenters at the end of the story explain to the woman that she not only has a MIL problem, but a husband problem, too. If she's not allowed to make her house a home, then her MIL can't do it, either. Scroll below to read the rest of the story.

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  • "I'm walking on eggshells in a space that's supposed to be safe."
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • "AITAH for telling my MIL to stop controlling what we buy for our home?"

    I'm 24, recently married, and trying really hard to build a home with my husband. We just moved into a small rental a few months ago. It's not fancy, but it's ours...
    via Technical-Try4155
  • well, supposedly. Here's the thing. His mom lives nearby and acts like she still runs our house. Like, full on CEO energy. Every
    via Technical-Try4155
  • time I try to buy something for the place literally anything she butts in. Curtains? "Too dark." Plates? "Don't match the
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  • kitchen." I once bought a laundry basket and she said it was a waste of money because we "could just use the old one from
    via Technical-Try4155
  • her house." At first, I let it slide. I told myself, "she means well." But it just kept getting worse. One weekend, I used my own money
    via Technical-Try4155
  • to buy a small table and a few kitchen supplies from the market. Stuff we honestly needed. My husband was okay with it. I was
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  • happy. Then she came over. Looked at the stuff and went, "Who told you that you could buy that? I'm the one in charge of the
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  • things here." She basically told me I don't get to decide what we put in our own house. Like... what? I lost it. Not yelling, not
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  • screaming, but I told her very clearly that she needs to stop. That she has her own house, her own furniture, her own decisions.
    via Technical-Try4155
  • This one's ours now. Mine and my husband's. We're not her roommates. We're adults. And I need her to respect that. She
    via Technical-Try4155
  • went silent for a second. Then said I was disrespecting her and stepping out of line. She told my husband I'm being "controlling"
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  • and "ungrateful." And now? He's... weird about it. He's not taking sides, just keeps saying, "Let's not make it a big deal." But
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  • it is a big deal. I feel like I'm constantly being told I'm out of place in my own home. I'm walking on eggshells in a space
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  • that's supposed to be safe. I don't even wanna buy a mug anymore without second- guessing. I don't know. I feel like I
    via Technical-Try4155
  • snapped because I'd had enough. But maybe I was too harsh? Maybe I should've waited and let my husband handle it? But he wasn't handling it.
    via Technical-Try4155
  • Cheezburger Image 10522323200
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • He never does when it comes to her. So now I'm here. Second- guessing myself. Again. I told my MIL to stop deciding what we buy
    via Technical-Try4155
  • for our house, and that it's our space-not hers. I stood my ground... but she called me disrespectful and now my husband's acting weird. AITAH?
    via Technical-Try4155
  • Ok_Cress8566 If she has a key take it back. Re key the house. Stop answering the door for her and every time she talks sh cut her off.
    via Ok_Cress8566
  • Technical-Try4155 You're right. Boundaries only work if I enforce them consistently. Time to follow through
    via Technical-Try4155
  • Educational_Rough743 NTA Honestly, if this was my husband and he acted this passive about his mother overstepping. I would have told him to go live with his mommy because he clearly doesn't want a wife.
    via Educational_Rough743

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family dynamics family drama entitled parents entitlement reddit story family feud married life decoration entitled family reddit thread parent Reddit new home entitled people apartment
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