Expecting stepmom leaves family vacation after her husband constantly jokes that the new baby is going to replace him and his 10 and 13-year-old kids: '“I’ll miss when you used to have time for my kids.'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Jun 30, 2025 8:00 PM EDT

There can be a lot of anxiety around what a new baby means for a family. It's extremely common for siblings, especially toddler siblings, to feel extremely jealous of the attention their parent is giving to a new baby. They feel like their parent won't love them or have time for them anymore. Even older siblings will feel resentful that the parent who was once at their beck and call is now at the beck and call of an infant. It doesn't mean that the sibling hates them, but the resentment needs to be dealt with if they don't grow out of it. 

You wouldn't expect a parent to be the one who is jealous of a new baby, but it happens more than you'd think. Husbands get jealous that their wife spend all their time taking care of their child instead of taking care of them. It sounds so absurd, and yet it happens. 

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  • 01

    AITAH for leaving a family vacation early because my husband kept joking I’d “replace them” with my new baby?

    I (32F) am pregnant with my first child. My husband (37M) has two kids from his previous marriage (10M, 13F). I love them, and we've worked hard to build trust over the past four years.
    via u/princesskaxt3

  • The husband in this story is jealous of the baby before it even arrives. He is roping his kids into the idea that his wife will stop having time for him and them once the baby is born, and his pregnant wife is not taking that mockery very well. 

  • 02
    Cheezburger Image 10523946496
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 03
    We recently went on a beach trip, and for some reason, my husband kept making jokes like, "Oh, soon you won't care about us, just the new baby!" or "I'll miss when you used to have time for my kids."
    via u/princesskaxt3
  • 04
    He'd say it in front of the kids, and I noticed they started pulling away from me during the trip. I asked him to stop, seriously, and he brushed it off as "light teasing."
    via u/princesskaxt3
  • 05
    Cheezburger Image 10523949312
    via Amine Bashir

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.
     

  • 06
    The last straw was when we were taking family photos and he said, "Better take the pic now before OP forgets we exist after giving birth."
    via u/princesskaxt3
  • 07
    I packed my bags that night and flew home. He says I embarrassed him and ruined the trip, and now his kids are asking if I'm mad at them. I'm not, I'm mad at him for planting that seed in their heads.
    via u/princesskaxt3
  • 08
    Cheezburger Image 10523951104
    via Andrej Lišakov (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 09
    AITAH for leaving instead of staying and "talking it through" like he wanted?
    via u/princesskaxt3
  • 10
    DescriptionFew6118 Nta. He's projecting his insecurities but that's not on you to solve.
    via u/DescriptionFew6118
  • 11
    Intelligent-Cup5509 He sabotaged your bond, then blamed you for leaving? Classic ab er playbook. NTA
    via u/Intelligent-Cup5509
  • 12
    Plane_Practice8184 So right. My ex complained that I loved our daughter more than I loved him. The husband is really the one who feels like he will be replaced. She should find out why his previous marriage ended. He must have been manipulative then. She should leave him because he just sabotaged OPS relationship with his children. She is NTA
    via u/Plane_Practice8184
  • 13
    Embarrassed_Meal1 That dynamic screams emotional manipulation. He weaponized "jokes" to drive a wedge, then played victim. Huge red flag, especially with kids involved.
    via u/Embarrassed_Meal1
  • 14
    HereWeGoAgain-1979 I love my kids more than my partner and I well hope they love the kids more than me
    via u/HereWeGoAgain-1979
  • 15
    Plane_Practice8184 Such people tend to have a family just for the image and how it portrays them to the general public. Good looking partner, kids in a good school, home well kept etc. They are nice to people outside so that when their partner tells others how they really are the partners aren't believed. They start the smear campaign while in the relationship.
    via u/Plane_Practice8184
  • 16
    In this case the OP is going to be busy raising 2 kids and an infant while doing damage control due to him. On the outside he'll have portrayed OP as unstable/ PPD, and not a good mother to his kids. Except the infant. People outside will believe it because they will see the step kids being cold towards OP. It is mental gymnastics but it happens. I've seen it before. Messing things up at home and showing the OP as unstable when she reacts.
    via u/Plane_Practice8184
  • 17
    Ammyea Weaponized guilt wrapped in "jokes" is still manipulation. He knew what he was doing.
    via u/Ammyea
  • 18
    Max_at_Red NTA at all This is some weird sh that your husband is pulling. One would expect that he would be happy to have a spouse that does the hard work of establishing a relationship with his kids.
    via u/Max_at_Red
  • 19
    And the fact is he is hurting his pregnant wife AND his kids. Is he generally a sh human or is this some kind of insecurity that he has successfully been hiding so far? In any case, you deserve better (so do his poor kids) and you should insist on the couples therapy at the very least.
    via u/Max_at_Red
  • 20
    TeacupVenom honestly the bar is in h | if basic parenting and emotional support gets treated like a threat
    via u/TeacupVenom
  • 21
    Lumpy_Marsupial_1559 What the h l is wrong with your husband? Why would he hurt his kids like that and damage the relationship you worked on with them? Guy needs therapy (this might have to do with what happened in his relationship with the kids' mom). And you need couples counselling. He might be pushing you away in advance so it's less hurtful when you do withdraw - as he apparently expects you to do. But the effect is that he's just pushing you away. And building a wedge between you and the k
    via u/Lumpy_Marsupial_1559
  • 22
    YOU need to talk to the kids - without him. And explain that you could see how his dumb comments were affecting them and your relationship with them. That you asked him to stop. That you love them, they are so important to you, and the effect his words were having upset you so much that you had to step away to stop him from making it worse. That you are sorry they felt it was about them, because it's absolutely not, and you want them to be part of everything. That you expect you'll be tired for
    via u/Lumpy_Marsupial_1559
  • 23
    GuiltyPeach1208 OP please please please talk to the kids directly. It's good you asked him to stop, and I get why you left early. But the kids must be feeling so confused and hurt. He definitely needs to fix this with them as well, but YOU could make this so much better by offering them reassurance yourself. Yes, things are going to be different, and yes, you'll be more focused on the baby in the beginning, but that does not change how you feel about them, they are not being replaced.
    via u/GuiltyPeach1208
  • 24
    Flying-Citrus356 Don't tease or otherwise mess with a pregnant woman. Don't.
    via u/Flying-Citrus356
  • 25
    ItsAMeasureOfALife NTA. There's no talking it through, you asked him to stop and he didn't. I don't see what there is to talk through
    via u/ItsAMeasureOfALife

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stepchildren family drama baby pregnancy jokes joking stepmom wife expecting stepdaughter husband family pregnant mom stepson vacation
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