"I told them I wasn't their servant": Sister dumps homecooked goodbye dinner in the trash after brother and family ignore her and refuse to eat, she bans them from visiting as consequence

Author image for Ely Bulnes
Ely Bulnes • Writer and Editor
Jul 11, 2025 5:00 PM EDT

Like most people, I was raised in the sort of household where food waste was a huge taboo. Now, my parents didn't sit me down and make me finish everything on my plate, but we did have an absurd amount of tupperwares filled with tiny leftovers in the fridge at all times. I continue this tradition in my current apartment with my partner, and it drives him insane. Still, I'd rather save the last few bites for later if it's really going to push me over the line between feeling full and feeling stuffed. 

Not every scrap from a meal can be saved. There are plenty of foods that really don't refrigerate well. I know they say that veggie sushi is fine in the fridge for a few days, but the vinegar in the rice can do some really funky stuff overnight, for example. In our story today, a host is forced to dump a fish dinner meant to feed 5 down the trash when her guests refuse to acknowledge her existence and effort. Scroll down for more. 

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  • 01

    AITA for dumping dinner in the trash and asking my family not to stay at my place again?

    Cheezburger Image 10528196608
    via Africa Images

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    My family is visiting for a couple of days: my brother, his wife, and their two kids.
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  • 03
    I tried to be a good host and cooked a nice dinner for everyone on their last evening here even though I had a busy day at work.
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    Cheezburger Image 10528197120
    via nesharm from Getty Images

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  • 05
    For context, my house has an open floor plan, so we were all in the same area.
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  • 06
    I let everyone know that dinner was ready, but no one came to the table. I thought maybe they hadn't heard me because the
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  • 07
    TV was on, so I repeated myself, but still got no response. I went ahead and made my plate and sat down to eat. Meanwhile, my
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  • 08
    brother's wife was watching Facebook videos, my brother was watching football, and their kids were playing video games.
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  • 09
    Cheezburger Image 10528196864
    via Yuganov Konstantin

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 10
    When I finished eating, I picked up my plate and asked if anyone was going to eat. My brother got up and went to smoke outside,
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  • 11
    the kids kept ignoring me, and his wife just gestured that she was busy. After 20 minutes, the food was cold, so I threw it away.
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  • This behavior is so incredibly impolite that it actually slips into the uncanny valley of human behavior and becomes somewhat surreal. 

  • 12
    I wished them good night and told them I wasn't their servant, and that the least they could do was acknowledge the effort
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  • 13
    someone puts into cooking for them. I also told my brother he wasn't welcome to stay at my place again.
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  • 14
    Cheezburger Image 10528197376
    via Susannah Townsend from baseimage

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  • 15
    EDIT: I had cooked fried fish. It doesn't reheat well. I didn't want my house to smell bad either!
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  • 16
    EDIT 2.0: The family eats fish, and a few days ago my brother mentioned he missed Mom's old fried fish recipe. So I decided to cook it for them.
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  • 17
    Legal_Significance45 R de as f for those people to act that way and they're teaching their kids the same
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  • 18
    behavior. You are not the a hole, no way. I would have probably said some more choice words if I were you I'll tell you that!
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  • Genuinely, how do you ignore someone serving you dinner in their own house? 

  • 19
    atx78703 OP What's most upsetting is the lack of acknowledgment. Their kids wouldn't even
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  • 20
    look up from their phones, and his wife just waved her hands to signal she was too busy to pay attention.
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  • 21
    Nooseynoose Seriously, I would've lost it too. Nothing like busting your a cooking and getting treated like you're invisible.
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  • 22
    Rendeane NTA. The next time your brother wants to visit, respond, "Great. Where will you be staying? We will have to get together for dinner while you are in town."
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  • 23
    This line was quickly taught to me by my coworkers when I transferred to Las Vegas. Everyone I had ever met was tracking me
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  • 24
    down, looking for a free place to stay. They quickly had other plans when they realized my doors were closed.
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  • 25
    TroublesomeTurnip NTA but I doubt this is unusual behavior from them. Stop hosting. Hotels and restaurants exist.
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  • 26
    imphooeyd NTA. You are not obligated to room & board family for free just because they're family.
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  • 27
    Nevermore664 I feel your anxiety and pain from here so unappreciated. Don't cook for them again. If you get cornered into providing food order pizza and ask them to contribute to it.
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  • 28
    atx78703 OP Thank you. I am not cooking for them again. He can order pizza for his family if they're hungry
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  • 29
    FreshWarmSocks People mad at you for wasting food are missing the principle of the matter. Sure it doesn't reheat well, that could've been a
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  • 30
    consequence in itself, but the biggest slap in the face would be if they weren't grateful guests and still got to enjoy the meal at their convenience. Can't reward that behavior.
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Tags

family drama guests toxic married with children brother siblings family feud relationships parenting couples dinner love family food raising kids entitled people
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