"I would never let a child go hungry in my house": 28-year-old brother caters to sister's picky eater children, she accuses him of undermining her parenting for refusing to let kids go without food

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    AITA for telling my sister I will feed her kids food they will eat as long as they are dinner guests and she has the choice not to come if that bothers her?

    "[She] always believed that picky eating was a parenting failure"
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    My family and I take turns hosting family dinners with everyone about once a month, sometimes more if we're simply looking to entertain. I (28m) like having dinner parties so I invite them over more.
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    My older sister (39f) always accepts the invites and then she complains that I feed her kids instead of leaving them with no food because they won't eat what she wants them to.
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    Cheezburger Image 10521856768
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    My sister has four kids. Two of them eat with no problems. The other two (oldest and third child) are labeled extremely picky eaters and won't touch most stuff. My sister has always believed picky
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    eating was a parenting failure and that kids will stop when it's not encouraged. But her oldest is 9 and her third child is 6 and both are still very limited in what they'll eat and show no signs of improvement
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    or growth. They have to take supplements because they don't eat enough and there's regular bl d draws to make sure they're doing okay.
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    Cheezburger Image 10521856256
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    I always cook what they'll eat. My sister doesn't agree with this. She feels they should be having everything or nothing. She doesn't want to coddle al
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    picky eater. I was always clear I would not let a child go hungry in my house even if they're simply a guest.
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    I rotate between the dishes I know each likes, soupy chicken fried rice, red pasta with fruit salad side, chicken stuffed baked potatoes to name a few of
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    them. It drives my sister absolutely crazy. This is whether everyone gets the same or I make her two struggling eaters something I know they'll eat.
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    Cheezburger Image 10521856512
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    Again, I was upfront about this with her when I started. I told her I would not let them go hungry in my home. She still comes and she still complains and accuses me of undermining her parenting. She
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    said I should not be feeding her kids things she says no to. I told her I will give them food that they will eat as long as she comes and if she doesn't like it she can choose not to come.
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    The rest of our family has my back which her off even more. I know I could stop inviting her but I love her kids and love seeing them and being able to help them eat. She confronted me for saying this
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    stuff to her. She said I should be more respectful. That's she's a mom and I'm not a parent and I'm not showing her the respect I should as the oldest sibling in our family.
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    cgrobin1 When they need supplements and bl d draws due to lack of nutrition. She isn't listening to their doctor.
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    big_bob_c Sounds like an actual parenting fail.
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    Obrina98 Maybe they just don't like her cooking. It's not like you're giving them junk food.
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    Which_Stress_6431 Seriously, this could be part of the issue. I was labelled a very picky eater by most adults when I was growing up. I wouldn't eat most meats or veggies. It was many years later that I found out I like things like beef that wasn't a hamburger, pork roast, turkey, etc. I realized.
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    my Mom overcooked just about everything, everything was very well done. Now I enjoy a medium steak, pork with a barely there hint of pink, and juicy poultry. I'm still fussy about some veggies but I will give most of them at least a taste (except peas, they are still gross).
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    EarthToFreya I was a picky kid, still picky as an adult but a lot better than I was. For some things the issue is more the textures than the taste, so a different cooking method can help. I still can't stand a lot
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    of meat dishes - if it's boiled, very fatty, chewy, dry, or something with bones, there is no way I am eating this. If it's grilled, a dish with good seasoning/sauce, or a dish with small pieces or ground meat - I am fine.
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    Some of my issues are due to bad cooking, but in other cases it can be a perfectly good beef stew or chicken soup, I just can't stand the texture of boiled meat.
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    Sissy Loves CuteAttire I'm going to be that person. Your sister is being childish about this. Everyone goes through these phases. I'm still going through these phases, where I find a new thing and I have got to have it several times a week. Sometimes a few days in a row. I bet your sister would freak out on me too.
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    She's the one who has the problem. She took her kids to Medical Professionals, and they explained this to her in no uncertain terms, but clearly, none of it sunk in at all. It can't be her?! She's the perfect single mom, after all, right?!
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    It's almost as if she would sooner see her kids starve, than have them eat what she wants them to eat. That, is the very definition of insanity. NTA.
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    cachalker NTA. Your home, your choice. I agree with you. If she feels that strongly about it, she can choose to stay away.
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    SatisfactionHour1722 NTA. She doesn't like your food choices she can choose not to attend.

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