25-year-old boyfriend is hurt when his 24-year-old girlfriend greets his dog before leaping into his arms: '[She's] making me feel less important'

Fellow pup parents know there's nothing quite like that "hello" moment when the door swings open and your dog rockets into a full‑body wiggle of pure delight. You've seen it a hundred times - those smiling eyes, that wagging tail, that happy "You're home!" energy. So when someone greets the fur baby first, it can feel like the world makes sense again: dogs give that unconditional, I‑miss‑you‑so‑much love in a heartbeat. If you've ever dropped everything to soothe an overexcited tail‑chaser or melted at a sloppy welcome kiss, you understand why diving into cuddle time is almost instinctual.

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Author image for Ayala Sorotsky Ayala Sorotsky
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  • 01
    r/AmlOverreacting ⚫ cheesyjerky3 AIO for feeling hurt my girlfriend greets my dog with more enthusiasm than she greets me? relationship
    via cheesyjerky3
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  • But what about the human waiting with open arms? As much as we adore our four‑legged besties, we also crave that first burst of “I’m so glad to see you” attention. If you’re the person who pours your heart into being your SO’s #1, you know how it feels to suddenly sense that you’ve slipped into second place. It’s not about jealousy - it’s about feeling special, seen, and prioritized in those first reconnection seconds.

    Have you ever wanted your own “You’re home” moment to come with a smile meant just for you? How do you juggle loving your dog and keeping that spark alive for your partner, too?

  • 02
    My (25M) girlfriend (24F) and I have been together for almost a year. We've gone through a lot of ups and downs but are very committed to making things work. We love each other deeply, and she's a great person overall.
    via cheesyjerky3
  • 03
    Here's my issue. I have a dog, Milo, who my girlfriend absolutely adores. And that's wonderful. I love that she loves my dog. But every time she comes over to my house, this same pattern happens: I stand by the door excited to greet her. •
    via cheesyjerky3
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  • 05
    We hug and give a quick hello kiss. Then she immediately runs into the house, calls Milo, sits on the floor, and spends the next 10-15 minutes completely zoned in on him, talking to him, cuddling him, kinda making me feel less important ⚫ When I try to chat with her during that time, she answers, but her focus stays on Milo.
    via cheesyjerky3
  • 06
    Eventually she'll come sit with me, but even then, she keeps petting Milo and giving him attention.
    via cheesyjerky3
  • 07
    It's not that I'm jealous of my own dog (which sounds hilarious). I love that Milo has her affection. But I can't shake this feeling of being...second place.
    via cheesyjerky3
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  • 08
    Earlier in our relationship, she'd come over and basically leap into my arms, excited to see me. She was engaged, affectionate, and fully present with me. Now, it feels like she's more excited to see Milo than to see me.
    via cheesyjerky3
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    via Ivan Babydov from Pexels

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  • 10
    I finally brought it up to her recently even though it can be difficult to bring up my feelings because I never want to make someone feel bad if I feel sad but I made it clear that she's not doing anything wrong, it's just how I feel.
    via cheesyjerky3
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  • 11
    it's less about Milo and more about how I'm wired: • Growing up, I often felt like the sibling who was "less important,” or like I wasn't the center of anyone's world. • So with my partner, I crave feeling like their #1, at least for those first few moments when we reunite. And to be honest she is the first relationship I've been in where I've felt like #1.
    via cheesyjerky3
  • 12
    My girlfriend listened and didn't get defensive (which I appreciate a lot). But she said she doesn't agree. she feels she does give me plenty of attention and thinks it's not a big deal. To be clear she does make me feel loved and gives me attention and affection. I
    via cheesyjerky3
  • 13
    think we just may have different love languages. I'm very thankful that she heard me out and did not get defensive. It was very embarrassing if I'm being honest because it sounds like it's about a dog.
    via cheesyjerky3
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  • 15
    So...here I am. I want to stress again: I don't think my girlfriend is doing anything wrong. She's not malicious. She loves Milo and she loves me.
    via cheesyjerky3
  • 16
    But is it unreasonable for me to feel a little hurt that her first big burst of affection goes to my dog instead of me? I don't even think any of this is a big deal, it's just something I've felt. I don't want this to be a big situation ya know.
    via cheesyjerky3
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  • 17
    Or does anyone else get why this might feel significant, because it's not just about a dog, but about wanting to feel prioritized and special in those first moments together? I think
    via cheesyjerky3
  • 18
    it'd be a lot different if after our big greeting after a long days work and we had a cute catch up convo of closeness then by all means, go for the dog and I'll play piano in the living room for the house to enjoy. That's all I'm saying.
    via cheesyjerky3
  • 19
    Thanks for reading. I genuinely want honest perspectives and please feel free to share if you think I'm being too sensitive or needy because if I'm being honest, I'm sure you can tell from this post that I am a very emotional guy. (Cancer sign here lol) I'm trying to understand my own feelings.
    via cheesyjerky3
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  • 20
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  • 21
    Dooraven Your feelings are valid, but you are slightly overreacting yeah. Earlier in our relationship, she'd come over and basically leap into my arms, excited to see me. She was engaged, affectionate, and fully present with me
    via Dooraven
  • 22
    Yes this is the normal phase all relationships go through - relationships go from infatuation to partnership to commitment. She's just no longer infatuated with you and that's ok and that's normal
    via Dooraven
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  • 23
    Few-Regret4002 ⚫ Top 1% Commenter NOR totally understandable especially if this brings up past trauma/issues. good that she listened, she can agree to disagree however.. she needs to work on putting her love & excitement toward you first especially if that's what you need & are requesting.
    via Few-Regret4002
  • 24
    Rivulet_Girl ⚫ Top 1% Commenter your feelings are valid. it's not about the dog, it's about wanting to feel seen and prioritized in that first moment. she's not wrong for loving your dog, but it's okay to want a quick moment of closeness with her first.
    via Rivulet_Girl
  • 25
    Not-a-Cranky-Panda ⚫ Personally I could not be with someone who was not like that.
    via Not-a-Cranky-Panda
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  • 26
    Beneficial-Cell-6355 YOR who wouldn't want someone to greet there dog like this? That just screams green flag
    via Beneficial-Cell-6355

  • That's a statement that any dog pawrent can stand behind - when your significant other loves your dog just as you, that's a green flag. A flaring, fresh green flag.

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