38-year-old millionaire expects working class girlfriend to pay majority of living expenses in exchange for agreeing to move abroad with her, she starts to question his finances: "[He says] he is making a sacrifice for me"

Author image for Ely Bulnes
Ely Bulnes • Writer and Editor
Jul 26, 2025 5:00 PM EDT

Moving in with your partner is a huge milestone. Not only do you get share a space and spend more time with your signigicant other, but it is something of a beta test for marriage. This is where you really get to see all of their red flags and find out for sure whether or not you're compatible. Do you both agree on how high the laundry pile must be before it needs to get done? Does on of you snore? Do you agree on how to tackle living expenses?
All couples who share a space split their finances differently. Some prefer to split bills and rent evenly right down the middle, while some take turns covering expenses at the end of each month. Others decide to pay in proportion to what they earn; in other words, the one who makes more, pays more. But what if your partner is a millionaire and still expects you cover most of the living expenses? Scroll down to find out.

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  • 01

    AITAH For not wanting to subsidise my millionaire boyfriend

    COCO "I dont think I should subsidize a partner who is significantly more wealthy than I am"
    via Oneinchpunch

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02
    I (F35) have been with my boyfriend (M39) for two and a half years. About 2 year's ago, my boyfriend moved from the South Coast of England, to live with me in London.
    via u/Big_Rest_5525
  • 03
    My boyfriend is a property investor and has a large amount of assets, including around 20 properties, a healthy six figures in stocks, shares
    via u/Big_Rest_5525
  • 04
    and crypto etc. He also makes 5 figures a month from coaching and has told me he is a millionaire. His mother has been living in his home whilst he lives with me, rent free.
    via u/Big_Rest_5525
  • 05
    85.00% Dutie 85.00%
    via fauxels from Pexels

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 06
    I also have my own flat, a rental property and a job which pays almost six figures. Aside from my rental property, I don't have any investments and I am not close to being a millionaire. He currently contributes £375 month to bills etc.
    via u/Big_Rest_5525

  • What on earth has this man done to convince our protagonist that he is a millionaire? Certainly not that he only contributes 375 pounds to their shared rent, I assume. 

  • 07
    On multiple occasions, he has told me he would prefer to live in a house where we are equal contributors as he would feel more secure (i.e. not my home) so I looked into a few local properties to rent but with little engagement from him.
    via u/Big_Rest_5525
  • 08
    My boyfriend has also told me throughout our relationship that he wants to travel and live abroad. I encouraged him to travel whilst we were together but he didn't, not once. Whenever I've asked him where he wants to live he's always replied "anywhere but the UK".
    via u/Big_Rest_5525
  • 09
    Fast forward to a couple of weeks ago and I get offered an interview for a job in Zurich. When I told him, I said I'd only go through with it if he
    via u/Big_Rest_5525
  • 10
    would come with me, should I be successful. He said 'yes' although it would mean his costs would increase. He even suggested he may never be able to retire.
    via u/Big_Rest_5525
  • 11
    I went through the process and was successful. The job is great and the package is fantastic. Talking today, my boyfriend has told me that one of his conditions on moving with me to Zurich is that I pay the majority of the living costs,
    via u/Big_Rest_5525
  • 12
    because he is making a sacrifice for me. He is comparing it to his costs should be moved to Dubai (a process which he hasn't started or even spoken much about).
    via u/Big_Rest_5525
  • 13
    We can't agree on whether this is fair. Yes, I will be earning more and benefitting from the opportunity. But equally, I don't think I should subsidise a partner who is significantly more wealthy than I am. I feel like this should be based on an equal contribution.
    via u/Big_Rest_5525
  • 14
    A couple of points to add: he is not flashy or frivolous and usually reinvests any money he makes; I can afford to do this on my own. AITAH for not agreeing to this?
    via u/Big_Rest_5525

  • She should go chase her dreams and Zurich and let him do his own, greedy “millionaire” thing. 

  • 15
    Cheezburger Image 10532469248
    via ViktorCap from Getty Images Pro

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 16
    jazzijanene I'm confused. You said "On multiple occasions, he has told me he would prefer to live in a house where we are equal contributors as he would feel more secure (i.e. not my home) so I looked into a few local properties to rent"
    via u/jazzijanene
  • 17
    So, why does he suddenly NOT want to be an equal contributor?? Is it because the home is in Zurich?
    via u/jazzijanene
  • 18
    Sounds like he's not being completely honest with you about his finances. I say dump him & move on with your new life in Zurich!
    via u/jazzijanene
  • 19
    Prudent-Reserve4612 This makes me think he was expecting them to buy a house with both names on it, then after they closed suddenly she'd be responsible for most of the bills/mortgage. He lost interest when she looked into somewhere to rent.
    via u/Prudent-Reserve4612
  • 20
    Lucky-Effective-1564 Tell him to move to Dubai; you move to Zurich and live your best life.
    via u/Lucky-Effective-1564
  • 21
    Cheezburger Image 10532468992
    via Kate Trysh from Pexels

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 22
    Ehy 350 Sounds like a scammer. Have you evidence of his wealth? Definitely not legitimate.
    via u/Ehy350
  • 23
    IncredulousPulp He owns 20 properties but he can't retire? What a load of garbage. He's a liar, move without him. ΝΤΑ
    via u/IncredulousPulp
  • 24
    sunny_suburbia He lives with you, but he pays under $400 in expenses to you? What a freeloader. I would dump his a,, take the job in Zürich and live your best life without him.
    via u/sunny_suburbia
  • 25
    Adelucas Sometimes the richest people are the most stingy. They didn't get rich by spending. Go to Zurich and leave him behind. You are doing phenomenally well in a difficult economy. You dont need him. In fact he's detrimental to your wealth growth. Stop looking at the flash and look at the person. That's not a cape its a giant red flag. Dump him immediately.
    via u/Adelucas
  • 26
    thirdtryisthecharm He's made it abundantly clear that he's not going to actively change anything to achieve his goals. And it sounds like as a result and change will always be "for you" and any negative will be "your fault". Considered if you really want to live with a partner like that
    via u/thirdtryisthecharm
  • 27
    AzetburGorkon This guy is not a millionaire. Hire a professional to confirm or deny this.
    via u/AzetburGorkon

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Dating-Relationships boyfriend relationship advice millionaire Female Empowerment relationships girlfriend couples love breakup rich people red flag money dating
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