40-year-old mom invites sister on 'family trip' so their 4 kids can play together, sneakily invites her husband and expects sister to play babysitter for them: 'You're here to watch the kids while we get some time to reconnect'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Jul 25, 2025 10:00 PM EDT

You never want to be brought somewhere under false pretenses. It's always best to be informed of whatever plan is in place ahead of time so you can orient your expectations. This is especially true on a trip. Going on a trip with someone is a big commitment, so you want to be sure that you've agreed to the right thing. You want to know where you're staying, who is going to be there, how much it's going to cost you, and what you're expected to do. 

This is exponentially true when there are kids involved. Taking kids anywhere requires a lot of planning, and you don't want to spring any childcare duties on anyone at the last minute. This is why it's extra important to lay out all the expectations before you pack your bags. You would hate to end up somewhere and realize it's not the thing for you. 

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    Cheezburger Image 10533703424
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • That's not what happened on this trip, where one woman was bamboozled into childcare in a way she wasn't comfortable with. What she thought was going to be a relaxing vacation with split childcare duties turned into a full-time babysitting gig. Read on to see what happened and decide who you think was in the right. 

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    AITA For leaving my sister and her kids, while on a "Family Only" vacation?

    My sister (40F) invited me (42F) and my two kids on a "Family Only" vacation. Just the two of us and our 4 kids. No husband (hers) and no bf (my kids father). I was excited to go because we haven't traveled with the kids, let alone have any sister time. Day of the
    via u/Apprehensive_Ship284
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    trip we load up and hit the road. I notice she's texting ALOT but I assume she's texting her husband on our progress. Once we arrived at our AirBnB I notice there are only two rooms. I didn't complain considering she paid for everything (as a gift for helping her through the year).
    via u/Apprehensive_Ship284
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    When we got inside the second bedroom had 2 sets of bunk beds and a full, while the other had a queen sized bed. She claimed the master, which didn't upset me because we had all types of activities planned. So honestly I could sleep anywhere. After getting settled, ordering pizza, and turning on a movie there was a knock at the door. She opened it
    via u/Apprehensive_Ship284
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    and there stood her husband, suitcase in hand. I was completely shocked since it was HER idea for it to just be us and the kids. I seemed to be the only one surprised.
    via u/Apprehensive_Ship284
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    When all the kids were in bed, I asked was he staying the whole week? His response, "of course youre here to watch the kids while we get some time to reconnect. "I was LIVID, she only invited me to be a babysitter. The whole premise behind the "Family Only" trip was a lie. I asked her why she didn't just say thats what she wanted, why lie? She said because she needed to make sure I came and the kids had an adult to monitor the weeks activities, since she had different plans for her and her husba
    via u/Apprehensive_Ship284
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    Too tired to argue, I went to bed. In the morning, I woke MY two kids up and checked into a nearby hotel. We spent the week in the hotel pool and site seeing. My sister and BIL kept calling. demanding I come back. I feel so betrayed and hurt. So AITA for refusing to be my sisters vacation sitter while she spent time with her husband, after she told me it was a vacation for just us and the kids?
    via u/Apprehensive_Ship284
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    Cheezburger Image 10533700096
    via Unsplash+ (Curated Lifestyle)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    Commenters had a lot of sympathy for this mother.

    Glittering_Shoe2855 4h ago Omg, nope I would have done the same! Would you have accepted it if you had known the plan? Maybe, maybe I would have too but if my brother had done the same. Id have run!!
    via u/Glittering_Shoe2855
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    ameliepwewa ⚫ 3h ago • Right? The second he showed up with a suitcase I'd be like "nope, I'm out." It's the fact that she couldn't just be honest like don't call it a sister trip if you're planning a whole couples retreat. Total bait-and-switch.
    via u/ameliepwewa
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    davidoodxhq81.2h ago Oof yeah, same here I would've grabbed my kids and dipped with zero hesitation. And honestly? If they'd just been upfront about needing a sitter, maaaybe I would've considered it (with wine and a detailed AA itinerary ) But the whole sneak attack? Nah, I'm not a free nanny with a side of betrayal
    via u/davidoodxhq81
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    Ecstatic_Possible_70 4h ago >She said because she needed to make sure I came and the kids had an adult to monitor the weeks activities >she paid for everything (as a gift for helping her through the year). Your sister and bil are ab Nta.
    via u/Ecstatic_Possible_70
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    Shadow4summer ·4h ago NTA. Did your sister think you would just stick around and accept this? Your sister is a selfish, self centered bi**h and a bad mother. Her kids thought they'd get more time with the mother, when in reality, she didn't want them there at all. What a blow to the kids.
    via u/Shadow4summer
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    lefty1207.3h ago You were played and you played back. You defended yourself. GOOD JOB!!
    via u/lefty1207
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    Powerful_Put_6977 • 3h ago Well done you! I absolutely love this for you and your kids. Hope you also managed to organise your own transportation home so that you don't have to go home with them.
    via u/Powerful_Put_6977
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    I'd also stop or significantly cut back on the 'help' you've been giving them because if this is the sort of thank you that you can expect, you'd probably rather not be conned into going on holiday! Well played OP....well played!
    via u/Powerful_Put_6977
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    Crewser-506 · 3h ago I thought it was going to be sister's affair partner at the door. So at least it wasn't that!! Doesn't make sister's behavior any more acceptable.
    via u/Crewser-506
  • 18
    Sharticus123 · 3h ago . NTA. Your sister is a manipulative lying POS.
    via u/Sharticus123
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    TheFairyQueen420 4h ago NTA but your sister sure is one. I hope you & your kids enjoyed y'all's self & hopefully they had a shyte time lol.
    via u/TheFairyQueen420
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    Expert_Slip7543 • 3h ago That's an astonishing level of bait & switch. OP's sister cannot be trusted with anything now, ever; pretty sad.
    via u/Expert_Slip7543
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    Comprehensive Put... 3h ago NTA - Your sister is a major AH and user. I would suggest you stop helping her for a while as it appears she views more as "the help" who is on- call for her than family.
    via u/ComprehensivePut5569
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    MeltedWellie 3h ago • Your sister is a lying manipulative person who tried, and failed, to ab e your kind nature. She is now just facing the consequence of her actions. Consider low contact with them for a while, or until you get an apology. NTA
    via u/MeltedWellie
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    SickerThanYourAvg24 3h ago NTA- Your sister is Shady AF! She could've at least asked you to babysit one or two nights while her and her husband "reconnected."
    via u/SickerThanYourAvg24
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    Ok_Childhood_9774 · 3h ago NTA. And your Christmas gift list just got smaller because I'd cross sis and her AH husband off. Permanently.
    via u/Ok_Childhood_9774
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    mallymal5291 • 3h ago Absolutely NTA. Sister and BIL are 100%. Why couldn't she have proposed a group trip? Get a bigger rental, alternate couples watching the kids, everyone wins. I grew up
    via u/mallymal5291
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    vacationing with close family friends. We're from the northeast US. We used to go to FL in Feb, all rent a giant house for a week. 2 master suites, space for us 5 kids, laundry, kitchen, game room, pool... We would have a park day (different park each year; magic kingdom, animal kingdom, exotic, universal
    via u/mallymal5291
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    studios, Busch gardens, etc.), a beach day, a shopping day, then just around the house and pool. We might go out to dinner once, and eat at the parks, but cooked otherwise. And laundry meant lighter packing, especially since we would drive to FL, and shed winter layers as we went. I would absolutely have done a
    via u/mallymal5291
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    group stay and agreed to each do some child care, and do some things together both families. But the way sister went about it, I would have left too. And called bf to join at the hotel.
    via u/mallymal5291
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    FacetiousTomato 2h ago This is one of those posts where you obviously don't think you're the ah le, and just wanted to tell a story about your sister being an ahle.
    via u/FacetiousTomato

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family drama aita drama AITAH sibling rivalry sibling memes siblings money problems reddit story family feud babysitting family sibling sister reddit thread Reddit money vacation
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