'Someone called the store... while they were in it': 15+ Customers who were weirding out the workers

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    This guy is in a hurry

    Lebrish I work at Staples in Canada and one blustery Winter morning, no cars were on the road, and us employees had trudged to work expecting it would not be a very busy day. Fifteen
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    minutes before we opened a man was yelling and banging on our automatic sliding doors, and he eventually hit it so hard, it busted open inwards and he stormed in yelling "I NEED WHITEOUT!"
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    This guy was extremely confused (but at least it makes for a funny story for the employee!)

    AntonSavino During high school I worked as a projectionist in a movie theater. One night while I was hanging out with the manager in the concession booth, waiting for the last shows to get done so we could close up a guy comes out of one of the theaters with his family and demands to speak to a manager. So my manager turns around and asks what the problem
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    is. The guy starts screaming that he wants his money back because he went into the wrong movie. The guy mistakenly went into "without a paddle" instead of "anacondas", he kept saying "the snakes never came, the snakes never came!". The movie was almost done at this point so there was no way we were going to give his money back so my manager offered
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    passes to come back again, the guy flips out pushes my manager out of the way and runs upstairs into the projection booth to try and get into our office or something. At this point I get on the phone to call the police. Just as I'm about to hang up the guy comes
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    KARATE D
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    back down stairs and sees me on the phone, he grabs a metal chair and throws it across the lobby at me about 20 feet, I dodge it and smashes a giant glass window. At that moment a undercover cop was driving back, heard the call and saw
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    the smashed window so get comes flying in and tackles the guy down. This was all in front of the guys 2 kids and wife who were super embarrassed in the corner of the lobby... Just one of many many ridiculous nights at the theater
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    BlackbeltJones Some maladjusted space cadet customer in a ridiculous hat/clothing ensemble was pushing her baby carriage around the furniture store. She was mumbling weirdo noises into this baby carriage; it wasn't quite baby-talk, more like a chitter you'd make at a squirrel, but with some voice inflection.
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    Anyway, I was about to approach her when a cat leapt out of the baby carriage! Scared the h I outta me! It jumped onto an entertainment center, and she picked it up and put it back in her carriage. She had one other cat and a rabbit in there, furniture shopping.
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    Customers can be so strange

    k... I am an office manager for a watch repair and retail shop and I had a customer bring in a pile of garbage from her car, including: a pencil, multiple kleenexes, a McDonald's toy, scraps of paper, gum wrappers, and general dirt; and drop it on my desk. She said "I was cleaning out my car and I don't have a trash can."
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    Cheezburger Image 10537182720
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    Awesome. Non ninja edit to add the other craziest customer: Old man comes in while I'm eating lunch (at my desk). I went back to grab his watch from the back room, came up front--and he was eating my chips. He'd reached across my desk, over my
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    computer, and grabbed my food to eat it. I said "Are you eating my chips?!" and he said "Well, I was just going to have a FEW!" then dropped them back on my desk.
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    [deleted] I was working at a pizza store downtown and this asian dude with a plastic bag, a raggedy plaid coat. and a cool mustache came in to the store. He didn't speak very coherently, and tried telling us that he didn't have enough money for pizza but still wanted pizza. He put his jacket and plastic bag down on the table nearest the door, he went
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    around the store asking other customers for money for pizza. Someone must have given him some change, because he came up with enough. We sold him a slice, and he went back to his table and began eating without sitting down. All of a
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    sudden, he starts talking to himself and swearing and things, and my co-worker is like "No, you gotta leave." He takes off out of the store and runs off, leaving his plastic bag and jacket there. Roughly half an hour later, my co-worker goes for her
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    break. She comes back telling me that she saw the same guy sitting outside McDonalds flipping people off that walked by, and he ended up giving the finger to a couple of cops. Not even five minutes later we see the same guy running past the store; followed by two cops.
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    shnoink666 i worked at a truck stop once as maintenence.. 1st bathroom check.. guy was washing his hands.. about a half hour or more later | went back in. he was still washing his hands.
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    banana-deathstar STORY TIME!! We had a chap at the Staples I worked at who liked chairs. I mean, really liked chairs. His name was Larry (or at least, he introduced himself as such), and for about a year and a half, dear ol' Larry would pop into the store, sit in a chair, and spin like a rabid wolverine on angel dust.
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    After about 15 seconds of this, Larry would get up, wobble a bit, and leave the store. Once, I had a customer who asked if he could fax a carrot. I told him that, sadly, Daucus carota requires physical transportation and cannot be sent in duplicate through telephone wires. He shrugged, then asked about coloured pencils.
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    We also had a lady who would come in now and again to send faxes to various intelligence agencies. She asked one of my co-workers what the FBI's fax number was. She spent some insane amount of money faxing God- knows-what to some Arab state.
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    Someone called the store once while they were in it (I saw them on their phone talking) to ask where the file folders were. When I showed them that I was in fact there in the flesh and could help without needing to use up a phone line, the man pointed to his phone and then started talking to me again. on the phone. He refused to conduct business any other way.
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    TL;DR - rural box stores are weird
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    TheBigNasty I worked at walmart and there was a customer who everyday came in and touch the donuts in the case. He would take bites out if them and stick them back in the case. He eventually got ran out of the store. He might have been homeless.
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    YouKnowRobo I was working as a night manager at a grocery store at the time. We had an undercover shopper (the security guards who pose as customers) come in this night. A few hours after the start of my shift, the undercover shopper tells me to keep my eye out for a suspicious man in his sixties. Things like this
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    happen quite regularly, and it really wasn't a huge concern. Twenty minutes go by, and the 'suspicious man' actually comes up to me. He tells me that there's a young vietnamese guy in the store who looks 'up to no good'. I ask him to point the man out and he discretely points at my undercover shopper.
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    Each thought the other was suspect, so for twenty minutes the two guys had been following each other, going in circles around the store. I loled.
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    GROCERY EVERY MANAGER'S MANAGER'S CHOICE CHOICE BAK
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    [….. I've been d¸ng to tell this story on reddit, but sadly this thread is really going and it's likely to get buried... but here goes: In the mid-90's during high school and summer breaks from college, I worked at Kmart. In the summer of 1996 I worked as the garden shop manager. It was a pretty nice job because it was semi-outdoors and
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    generally the store managers only really came. out to shot the sh once in a while, so it was laid back most days. One sunny Sunday we were really busy. I mean slammed. Everyone with a lawn seemed to be at the store getting supplies to groom their kingdoms. I was ringing someone up when I heard a gas motor start up in the back of the patio area. I
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    waved another associate over to finish checking the customer out and moved very quickly to the back of the store to find a man I recognized to be a regular customer testing out a gas edger. This wasn't good, as there shouldn't be any gas in these edgers, nor should they be started in the store. I shouted over the shrill growl of the little motor, "SIR! SIR! YOU HAVE TO
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    TURN THAT OFF!!". The man turned if off and got indignant, "Why?" "Sir, you just can't start power tools in the store.", I replied. "But there was gas in it", he argued. "Well, it was probably a return and someone forgot to empty the gas from it.", I
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    said, "I'm sorry, but you just can start this in the store." "But why? I have a right to test it, don't l!" "I'm afraid you don't, we can't start this in the store, because it's a liability, someone could lose a foot." I tried to sound official so this guy would just drop it. With that, the man threw down the edger, a flew into a
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    rage shouting "A H_LE!" as he stormed off. I was puzzled, but I was glad it was over and I went back to work. To tell you a little about this guy: He was a regular customer. I lived in a small town, and this guy came in once every other day. He always wore a track uniform type jump suit and the sort of athletics prescription glasses you'd wear to play
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    racquetball. In my mind, he was "prepetual raquetball guy". Needless to say, he was a bit eccentric. The next morning it was a rainy day. The place is slow. on Mondays, and even slower on rainy days. I was just opening up the store and getting the register ready when I saw him chug through the store in his typical odd fashion. About 45 minutes later he was
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    HABE D Tfal
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    back at my register. He set down his purchase, and I still remember: A fishing lure, a package of badminton birdies, and an elbow for a 1/4" pvc pipe. I rang it up and turned to him to tell him the price. "That will be four fifty two.*" I said as I turned to look at him... WHAM!!! The guy slapped a wooden leg down on the counter!! He glared up at me with the fury of a
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    thousand tiny handicapped suns and said something I'll never forget: "I LOST MY LEG TO A LAWNMOWER WHEN I WAS TEN YEARS OLD, AND YOU DON'T THINK I KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT LAWN- SAFETY???!!!!" I stood there stunned for a moment, my brain was trying to process the situation. Obviously, if he lost his leg to a lawn mower,
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    his experience is a little bit more in-depth than mine, perhaps... however, it's clear he doesn't know anything about safety around lawn equipment or he wouldn't have lost his leg in the first place, right? I didn't know what to say, so I repeated my statement. "That will be four fifty two."
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    rd!", he "You arrogant b said as he hopped up and down struggling to reattach his wooden appendage. "I'll be waiting for you when you get out of work, you son-of- a-b !!" Then he stormed away and I never saw him again.
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    *disclaimer: I don't remember the actual price of the goods he was going to buy. TL;DR One time a guy started an edger in my store, and I told him he couldn't because someone could "lose a foot" and he left and came back and threatened me with a wooden leg.
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    ooberu These stories are from a friend of mine who worked at a UPS store which he aptly named "The Magnet". • A gangster white guy shows up wanting to ship 4 car rims with the tires on them. Obviously these are heavy as h I and quite expensive to ship. After
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    being quoted a large price by my friend, he freaks out. He calls the guy he's shipping the tires to and asks what he should do. Suddenly, an epiphany! "Yo- That's a dayum good idea, dawg! Sh Lemme call you back after this." He says to my friend, quite pleased with himself: "Yo these tires are 35 . . .
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    pounds PER SQUARE INCH. Imma let all the air out of 'em and they're gonna be way lighter." My friend takes a few seconds to process this and says "ON WHAT PLANET?!" The guy took some time to understand but finally didn't end up shipping his tires. • A woman shows up with a FoodSaver and
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    asks how much it would be to FAX it to a number in Japan. My friend calmly and politely explains that you can't fax a package, it only works for paper. She becomes upset and says this is ridiculous and that she's done it before.
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    TL:DR Guy tried to let air of some tires he was shipping to make them ligher and less expensive to ship. Lady tries. to say she's faxed a package in the past.
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    m... A customer (woman, mid 30's) walks into our office. For no apparent reason, in her best Schwarzenegger accent, she says, "Get to the choppa!" Made my day. There was not a straight face in the room.
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    face Not really weird, just very stupid. I used to be a "courtesy clerk" at a grocery store, which is a nice way of saying I was their b .I | basically did everyone elses job for a quarter of the pay. Anyways, I was tending to the bottle return area one day when I see a guy trying to put empty bottles in a machine that was labeled "Out of Order" with a big
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    bright orange sign. This conversation followed: Me: "Sir, you may want to try one of the other machines because that one is currently out of order." Him: "Oh, it's broken?" Me: "Yeah, it's not working right now, but any of the other machines should work fine" (we had 10 machines total, all vacant) Him: "So I can't use this one?" Me: "No, it's
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    not working. Sorry about that" Him: "So I can't put my bottles in it?" Me: "You can, but it won't move or give you any money" Him: "Ohhh, okay. It's broken." Me: "Yup" Him: "So I have to use another machine?" At this point I just walked away.
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    blooperama I used to work at the desktop publishing side of a 24-hour copy shop and for whatever reason, we had to run the fax machine, sending and receiving faxes for customers. One night this guy came in and asked if our lines were secure 'cuz he had some sorta top- secret document he needed to send. I told him I had no idea what a secure line
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    would even be but that our lines most likely were not. He started talking to me about secure phone lines and the importance of the schematics he wanted to fax and whatnot, then pulled a folder out of his briefcase and then pulled out the sheet he needed to send. It was this crayon drawing of an airplane - the type of airliner airplane drawing that
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    a three-year-old does with a side view of the fuselage but with the wings sticking out from the top and the bottom like in a top view. I mean it literally looked like a 3-year- old drew this thing. We had a lot of crazy people come in to that shop in the middle of the night.
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    apester Back in the early days of the internet I worked for a dial up ISP, we had one customer that thought the tech support line was tech support for any computer problem he had. We tried to be as cordial as possible and even pointed the guy in the right directions for troubleshooting when possible but calmly
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    explained that the tech support line was for connecting and using the internet service only and that for other problems he needed to contact the software manufacturer or the manufacturer of his computer. After one
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    particularly trying call he actually drove to the offices, carried his computer into the lobby and threw it into the glass wall in front of the equipment room. He was ranting about suing and how his Worldbook cd wouldn't work and we were unwilling to fix it so our customer service sucked. He never sued, but we did....smokey glass walls are expensive.
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    Siderealcat I was negotiating the price for a translation from English to Bulgarian for 3 documents. The customer was trying to haggle, but we were in the process of explaining that our prices aren't negotiable. Suddenly the man turns towards one of my co-workers (who had
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    taken no part in the conversation whatsoever and was just working on her computer), took her hands in his and told her: "You have the most beautiful nails."
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    May this love find me

    [deleted] I didn't work there, but I've seen someone propose in a Taco Bell before. She said yes. O_O
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    Zeppelanoid Lady threw a $230 golf cart about 20 feet into another $230 golf cart because she thought I was ignoring her (I had been serving another customer).
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    expert02 Working at Geek Squad, I had a guy that brought in his 1+ year old LCD TV (house brand cheapo, about 42"). It had the extended service contract. When he found out he could not get an immediate replacement and it would have to be sent out to get fixed, he picked it up and SLAMMED it on the floor and stormed out (voiding his warranties,
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    which don't cover any physical damage). Working at Office Depot, had a lady come in asking about security software for her cell phone. She said her crazy ex-husband was super smart and was monitoring her phone calls and text messages and tracking her location. The kicker? She said he copied her SIM card. It was a Verizon phone (CDMA, not GSM).

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