Family-in-law criticize working mom for taking 3-year-old to daycare once a week, she tells them to get jobs: 'Some days I don't get to work all day and have to work into the night'

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  • AITA for telling my in-laws to get a job?

    I've been stressed out lately and I think I blew up on them and was unnecessarily r de now that I'm calming down enough to think about it. Me and my husband both work. We have a 3 year old. He works at an office job while I work from home while being a stay at home mom. So I keep the house together, cook dinner and work while keeping my toddler entertained. It's tough, but we're doing it and have a system. My job is flexible and as long as I get tasks done at the end of the week, they're happy.
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  • Life got tough and I began to get behind on tasks so we agreed to try out daycare once a week so that can be my one full "work day" without being a mom or focusing on the house. Anyway, my in laws keep making comments about it that me off. When I first mentioned it, they were shocked and said that we're spending a lot of money just for something I can do. After a few months, they started making comments like "oh its your break day!" Or "you get to relax today."
  • My 2 sister in laws are stay at home moms and I just can't find myself relating with them. They talk often about how they get to nap during the day and how they do playdates and drink wine with other moms. They talk about all these shows they watch or tiktok trends. I don't ever have time for those unless I stay up after bedtime but I'm usually too exhausted for that. I don't judge their lifestyle, in fact I'm happy that they are able to do this and hope that once my husband finishes his schooli
  • I usually can ignore them but last night we were over at a family gathering. My MIL and 2 SILs were talking and they mentioned how today would be my "break day" again. I laughed awkwardly and tried to change the subject but my sister in law kept exclaiming that I'm sooo lucky and that she's envious that I get a break just to relax. I tried to mention that its not much of a break with working, but my other in laws chimed in and were talking about how they wished they could just leave their kids w
  • Edit to add: my husband does just as much as I do, if not more!! I get more sleep than he does. We just are trying not to get any debt and are investing in our future right now. I didn't mean to make it sound like he's slacking
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  • Outsiders sympathized with her being at her limit.

    razzledazzle626 First and foremost, stop calling yourself a stay at home mom. You are not a stay at home mom. You are a working mom who manages her household while constantly multitasking.
  • NoThanks8790 NTA except to yourself. You're not a stay at home mom if you're working. Get your husband to step up and do his share and stop following whatever cr p you guys are listening to that says that women should take care of the house. If he uses a bathroom or a dish he can clean it too
  • Mowsmom22 Don't apologize. They are being petty at your expense. It's not a joke if it's laughing at your expense. Don't grovel. They already think they are better than you. Keep doing you. Be the best version of you for your family. Pay this no attention!!
  • ItWorkedInMyHead What are you apologizing for - telling the truth? They've been purposely misrepresenting what you do every time they open their mouths. All you did was correct them. You didn't overreact. If anything, you've been underreacting, while allowing them to mistreat you. You simply met their aggression with something they understand. Good for you. And I your husband "agreed" you overreacted. Well, he's just a peach, isn't he? Why hasn't he spoken up to defend you, to get his obnoxious
  • Asprinkleofglitter7 you. NTA, and your husband should be sticking up for Working while taking care of kids is not an easy task. It's not your fault your in-laws are kind of stupid
  • POOHead Sounds like he did have her back. He packed everyone up and they left. It would have been engaging if he was still lounging around. lol
  • Trekunderthemoon I don't think you overreacted. They have been picking at you over a protracted period of time but you should probably stop trying to laugh it off. Just address it directly from now on. "I don't get a day off I have a full time job, I parent my child and I run our home, I don't have time to watch tv or scroll social media."
  • StockAdhesiveness351 Copy this and send it to all the in laws. I'd add more bite to it personally. "In case you were wondering why I snapped at everyone, I'm tired of the passive aggressive comments. I don't get a day off I have a full time job, I parent my child and I run our home, I don't have time to watch TV or scroll social media like you always have the time for. So no, I don't get a break day, and I would appreciate if you all would stop trying to make me seem lazy when you should be sayi
  • SimpleMondayPizza NTA and you need to stop calling yourself a SAHM. You're a WFH mom. You are doing 2 complete full- time jobs.
  • Lemon586 NTA. Working from home and being a stay at home mom is doing 2 full time jobs simultaneously. It is NOT easy. I used to watch my nephew while working from home, and it was tough. But I was lucky enough to send him home at the end of the day. You do not get a break, even on your "break day". That just gives you 1 day a week to be able to focus on the job that helps pay the bills.
  • isoscelesone Your kid should be in daycare the whole week if you have full time day job.
  • fearnodarkness1 Also love the boomer mentality of MIL to talk about how expensive it is. Maybe take the kid for a day or two like their parents did for them. NTA in the slightest. Making a joke at someone who doesn't want/like it isn't a joke.
  • SLIM7600 I don't think you overreacted, good for you
  • Mummifiedsu Don't you dare apologize!!! just reiterate how you came close to losing your job as you couldn't just do your job at home. You had your child also then shared all the chores. The day without your child is literally a last ditch attempt at keeping your head above water in your work life.
  • AccomplishedAd9969 Girl why are you feeling bad for defending yourself?? The problem is you had to defend yourself to begin with!!!
  • Downtown Area111 "Break day?" What Break do you get? You get a few hours away from your child so you can work and hopefully get some housework done! Screw them! Don't apologize! NTA!

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