Mom uses $15K from her 21-year-old son's college fund to pay for her 24-year-old daughter's wedding venue: 'He told us college was a scam for sheep and that he would be a millionaire before his friends even graduated'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Aug 21, 2025 8:00 AM EDT

The thing about get-rich-quick schemes is that they seldom, if ever, work. That sad reality is that for the majority of the population, it takes a considerable amount of time to get rich. You have to save, watch your spending, make big moves in your career, and sacrifice your desire for years and years before it even becomes a possibility. That's not a glamorous thing to sell to young people, so all but a few financial influencers do so. The most popular influencers for young men are saying that crypto, day trading, and sports betting are all viable ways to get rich quickly, even though that's patently untrue. They're also saying that college is a scam and should be forgone by their audience. I would agree that college is a scam if you have to take out hundreds of thousands of dollars in loans for a degree that doesn't earn you that much money, but if your parents are paying for it in full, it's probably a pretty good deal, no matter what your degree is in. 

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  • A courtyard with white flowers
    via Soulseeker - Creative Photography

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • The son in this story is being misled by influencer culture and his parents. His parents saved $40K for him to use for college, but he decided not to go to college because he wants to be an influencer. Instead of keeping his money until he came to his senses, his parents spent over a third of it on his sister's wedding venue.

  • Am I a bad guy for using my son’s college fund to pay for my daughter’s wedding after he dropped out to become an influencer?

    Okay Reddit, I'm in a massive family feud and I genuinely don't know if I'm the monster here. I (50F) and my husband (52M) have two kids, "Mark" (21M) and "Chloe" (24F). Since they were born, we've diligently saved for their education. We set up separate college funds for each of them, and we were proud to have saved a significant amount,
    via u/GeologistSuper5916
  • enough to get them both through a four-year degree without debt. Chloe used her fund, graduated, and is now a teacher. She's getting married next year to a wonderful man. They are paying for most of the wedding themselves, but like many young couples, they are on a tight budget. Mark started college two years ago. To be
    via u/GeologistSuper5916
  • blunt, he hated it. He was always more interested in his social media presence. Last semester, he officially dropped out to pursue a full-time career as a YouTuber/Tik Tok influencer. He makes videos about crypto and "life-hacking." He told us college was a "scam for sheep" and that he would be a millionaire before his friends even graduated. My
    via u/GeologistSuper5916
  • A young man wearing headphones listening to music
    via Jordan González (Unsplash+)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • husband and I were disappointed but believe he's an adult and can make his own choices. The issue is his college fund. It's just been sitting there. He has about $40,000 left in it. A few months ago, Chloe and her fiancé were looking at their wedding budget and were heartbroken that they couldn't afford the venue they dreamed of and would have to
    via u/GeologistSuper5916
  • cut their guest list drastically. Seeing her so upset, I proposed an idea to my husband: what if we used a portion of Mark's leftover college fund to help Chloe have the wedding she deserves? My reasoning was that the money was always intended for a major life milestone. Since Mark chose not to pursue his education, helping Chloe start her
    via u/GeologistSuper5916
  • married life felt like a good use of the family's money. My husband agreed. We gave Chloe $15,000 from the fund. She was ecstatic and in tears, and it has made a huge difference in her wedding planning. We didn't tell Mark. We figured it was our money, saved by us for a specific purpose (education) that he had rejected.
    via u/GeologistSuper5916
  • A group of people walking down a street on a college campus
    via Sai Kiran Belana

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Well, last week Mark found out. His friend is marrying at the same venue and he heard how Chloe was suddenly able to afford it. He confronted me, and I was honest. He completely lost it. He said we "stole his future" and "betrayed" him. He claimed he was going to use that money to buy new camera equipment and invest in crypto. He said that just because
    via u/GeologistSuper5916
  • he wasn't following our "boomer life script" didn't mean we had the right to take his money. He called me an a hole, said I always favored Chloe, and has now blocked me and his dad on everything. My sister says we were wrong and that the money was morally his, regardless of our intentions for it. Chloe feels incredibly guilty, and the whole
    via u/GeologistSuper5916
  • situation has cast a dark cloud over what should be a happy time. My husband and I are still united, but I'm starting to wonder if we crossed a line. The money was for his education, which he abandoned. We just repurposed it for our other child's major life event. So, Reddit, AITA for giving my daughter money from her brother's college fund after he dropped out?
    via u/GeologistSuper5916
  • North81 Girl To me personally having a big expensive wedding you can't afford is just as insane as a kid wanting to be a social media influencer
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  • Psychological-Fox97 Yeah if it was a down-payment on a house I'd view it differently but to ridiculous. it on a wedding is
    via u/Psychological-Fox97
  • Hidden_Spirit142 Fair point. A wedding is a party; a house is an investment. Using the fund for a down payment would've been easier to defend. Blowing it on a single day does feel a little questionable, even if the intention was good.
    via u/Hidden_Spirit142
  • NotAQuiltnB Good gosh don't give OP any ideas. LOL.. She clearly favors the daughter. The boy is 21. How many kids that age are idiots? OP really stepped in it.
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  • Loosenut2024 I mean to be fair the son is brain de d of he's into crypto. And investing in crypto is like heading to Vegas and slot machines. Most of the time you just lose. ESH
    via u/Loosenut2024
  • Agreeable-animal It sounds like the son doesn't want to work and thinks making a living as an influencer is key to an easy life with little effort and he gets to be famous with little talent.
    via u/Agreeable-animal
  • EpicKiddo But it seems like they were sad yet understanding that they could not afford the wedding they wanted. They were going to use a different venue and invite less people to offset the cost until op said "wait I have money!"
    via u/EpicKiddo
  • ABC_Family Right, they spent money meant to provide future security for their children, on a party that is clearly outside of their means. If the brother decides after a year he wants to go back to school, then what? Are they also going to chip in for his wedding? Why not? It does seem they are favoring the daughter. They fed this up.
    via u/ABC_Family
  • WildlifePolicyChick FIFTEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS. FOR A VENUE. Not the whole wedding, not for the honeymoon. Not for a down payment on a house. For a space you are going to use for a few hours. That alone, OP. Minority opinion, I'm sure.
    via u/WildlifePolicyChick
  • andmewithoutmytowel I've had some wondering about this too-my son is 13, smart, but not academically motivated like his mom and I were. He's mentioned not going to college, while we have about $65k in his college fund (started it before he was born). If he doesn't go, we might save it for a down payment on a home, or something else. I'm not sure if it's "his money," or our money that we've set aside for a purpose, and if he doesn't go to college, do we take it back?
    via u/andmewithoutmytowel
  • GoodIntelligent2867 It should boil down how responsible he is even if he decides not to go to college. Influencer and crypto dreams are not responsible. If your son goes to trade school or starts a small business or proves that he is motivated, you may want to help him with the money you saved for him.
    via u/GoodIntelligent2867
  • Ok-Locksmith-3907 Ouch. Not okay. As someone who didn't go to college till I was 28.. I relied on my 529 account to get me through a lot of it. Taking that option away from your son and giving it to your daughter for a wedding who I imagine had a similar fund herself is blatantly showing your son who your favorite kid is..
    via u/Ok-Locksmith-3907
  • captainnonsensical YTA he's 21. What if he decides to go back to school? What if he gets married and wants more than he can afford? I'm not saying to give it to him to use as an influencer, but you gave it to your daughter for a non- education purpose without even discussing his plans or what happens to the fund when he dropped out? I'd be upset if I were him, and honestly I'd be upset if I were his sister. You've messed up their sibling relationship as well as your relationship with him. Sure,
    via u/captainnonsensical

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