25+ of the Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (August 28, 2025)

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  • 01
    Dadman W... @dadmann_... Aug 25 No one is more shocked than my own kids to find out that they ate all the snacks I bought them within 2 days.
  • 02
    Hollie Harris @allholls ⚫ 3h • Me: We really need to be more mindful about what we buy and start saving money. Also me: *goes to Costco for two items and comes home with two pallets of products*
  • 03
    Emma Scott @EmmaScott • 15h ... I just said we need to buy some "chinless skicken br ts", if anyone wants to know how tired my brain is after the last week.
  • 04
    DADMANN Dadman Wal... @dadmann_wal....5h ... Last night I fell asleep on the couch. I woke up at 12:30 to my 12 yo (who went to bed 2 hrs before) turning off house lights, he put a blanket on me and was cleaning up my dish and can of coke zero. I love that kid.
  • 05
    redyellowgreendanc... @RYGda... 21h • What's fun about having your child visit a friend whose house is visibly in another income bracket that is stratospheres above your own is when your kid repeatedly points out the size and amazingness of every item in that house compared to theirs for all to hear
  • 06
    One Awkward... @oneawkwa... Aug 26 Ø Me: We really need to be better about our language around the kids. Husband: why? Our 2yo struggling to get the lid off a marker: marker. Husband: I see.
  • 07
    meghan @deloisivete · Aug 26 7yo: hug me, hug me, POS me: excuse me, what 7yo: that's short for please me: 7yo: me: you mean PLS 7yo: oh yeah, hug me, PLS
  • 08
    your other m... @difficultp... Aug 25 ☑ • Made it to week 4 of school before I caught a virus so clearly my immune system is in tiptop shape because of wine and sandwiches.
  • 09
    DADMANN Dadman W... @dadmann_... Aug 25 ☑ • No one is more shocked than my own kids to find out that they ate all the snacks I bought them within 2 days.
  • 10
    One Awkward... @oneawkwa... Aug 25 . Me, playing my favorite childhood video game with my 7yo: Your uncles would be so excited seeing how good you are at this. 7yo: yeah, well, they're de id. Me: ...
  • 11
    meghan @deloisivete - Aug 24 Stirring my coffee with a fork because my kids' greatest magic trick is making all the spoons disappear ..
  • 12
    • Not Today E... ❤ @NotTodayE... Aug 24 ☑ Welcome to adulthood: whoever dies with the most shopping bags wins. ...
  • 13
    SARCASTIE SM MOMMY Sarcastic M... @sarcastic... Aug 24 . I'm not a regular Mom. I'm a "YOU BETTER DI IN YOUR VIDEO GAME BECAUSE DINNER IS READY IN 5 MINUTES!" Mom.
  • 14
    Simon Holl... @simoncholl....Aug 24 ... All these pictures of kids moving into dorms making me realize I'm too old to sleep on a bed that high.
  • 15
    SARCASTIC Sm MOMMY Sarcastic M... @sarcastic... Aug 24 . ... My husband came home from being out of town for 6 days, walked through the door & went straight to the dog. If you're wondering what 20+ years of marriage looks like.
  • 16
    Hollie Harris @allholls Aug 24 • My mom asked me to stop at Costco to pick up a few things for her on a Sunday, so I must not be her favorite child.
  • 17
    Rodney Lacr... @RodLacr... Aug 23 Ø • ... Me: [driving 90 minutes to son's school for move-in day] Wife, in passenger seat: [starts crocheting] Me: How old ARE you?
  • 18
    Not Today E... @NotTodayE... Aug 24 ☑ • ... Turns out the trick to staying up late is telling yourself you're going to bed early.
  • 19
    Rodney Lacr... @RodLacr... Aug 23 Ø • My stepson is all moved back up to college so now starts the yearly transformation of turning his bedroom into a speakeasy.
  • 20
    meghan @deloisivete Aug 23 • 0 Hanging out upstairs until my need for coffee outweighs my need to not see the neighbor kids who have been over since 7am
  • 21
    Sweet Momissa @sweetmomissa • 1h Marked zero years safe from one of my kids asking to stay home from school in the first two weeks. ...
  • 22
    krista @kristabellerina • 15h ... No one: No one: My kid: What's a carpetbagger? Do they steal carpets?
  • 23
    Hunter the Boun... @huntergr... Aug 24 ... Well, it looks like Satan has taken the form of my kid's science homework yet again.
  • 24
    Jennifer Parker @Mrs_JParker · Aug 26 • I'm really grateful to have a kid who tells me all about his school day when he gets home. Otherwise I'd never know that he's learning nothing and I don't know. ...
  • 25
    krista @kristabellerina - Aug 26 Maybe instead of telling someone she looks tired we try telling her to take a break because she deserves it. I bet she'd like that.
  • 26
    Michael Vogel @MichaelVogel1. Aug 25 Superman: Why was I called here? Me: I'm exhausted. I need you to watch my 3 kids while I go take a nap. Superman: I don't do that Me: I thought your super powers included the power of super-vision Superman: Yes, but that's... Me: (running away) keep it down for about 2hrs...
  • 27
    krista No one: No one: @kristabellerina · Aug 25 My kid: What's the color of denim?
  • 28
    That Mom Tho @mom_tho Aug 24 ... I hope to always have the optimism of me, before the first day of school, thinking this will be the year we get everything ready the night before

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