Woman finds late grandmother's missing cookbook at ex-boyfriend's house, he admits to stealing it after trying to pass it off as his own: 'He knew what that book meant to me'

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Ely Bulnes • Writer and Editor
Aug 28, 2025 4:00 PM EDT

When you're living with someone, be it a friend or partner, and you're sharing your time, space, and possessions, boundaries can start to get a little blurry. A few years back, one of my roommates and I basically shared a closet because we were the same size and had a similar style. One day, she "borrowed" one of my favorite sweaters, and I never saw it again. She swore she just forgot to return it, but I later found out that she had given it away as a gift to her cousin. I felt betrayed, and it wasn't exactly about the sweater. Being disregarded and disrespected by someone close to you is always jarring; it helps you put your relationship for perspective, for the better or worse. 

Being betrayed by an ex isn't exactly a shocking concept; exes are exes for a reason! But this young woman actually managed to stay on really good terms with her ex-boyfriend. That is, until he invited her over for a double date to show off his cooking skills. The spaghetti and meatballs dish smelled familiar, drawing her to the kitchen, where she discovered a familiar cookbook: her missing family recipe book and the only surviving keepsake connecting her to her late mother and grandmother. Not only had he taken it and kept it without her permission, but he tried to pass it off as his own.

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  • 01

    My ex stole my recipe book, so he could still eat my cooking

    Cheezburger Image 10547842048
    via KatarzynaBialasiewicz from Getty Images Pro
  • 02
    Anyways!! This occurred last week, thought I'd share this rollercoaster with you all
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 03
    So Me (26F) and my ex (30M) broke up around 3 years ago now. We left on really good terms and both agreed the love had just fizzled and we'd stay friends.
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 04
    He found someone (28F) he loves and they're hoping to seal the deal soon. I've also found someone (31M) new and it feels just so natural and comfy I couldn't imagine anyone else.
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 05
    Ex invited my self and my partner along with a few other friends over for dinner! Since he met his fiancé he has
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 06
    raved about how good of a cook she is, and myself being a bit of a wizz in the kitchen I was excited to finally try!
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 07
    Cheezburger Image 10547842304
    via Milan_Jovic from Getty Images Signature
  • 08
    Cut too the night of the party, we're all sitting down about to dig into an amazing meal, when a very familiar smell hits my nostrils... it smells like
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 09
    my grandmothers meatballs. Trying to think nothing of it I enjoy my meal and offer to help was up. Fiancé insists that I don't need to but of course I insist harder. So we head into the kitchen
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 10
    There on the kitchen counter is my recipe book that had been lost for the last 3 years. I know what you're thinking why do I care so much about
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 11
    a book... this was a note book my grandmother had worked on for my mother before she d d, and then my mother had worked on for me while battling terminal cancer. It wasn't just a book there were family recipes and
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 12
    memories in every fibre of every page. This is the one and only thing I had left of either of them.
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 13
    So... I casually ask, "oh neat is this your recipe book" fiancé replies "Oh no it's 'Ex's' grandmothers he insisted I used a recipe from it tonight"
    via u/Spectacle-Bear

  • This is the worst part for me. I mean, stealing the book was bad enough, but trying to pretend like it was his in front of the real owner is absolutely wild. 

  • 14
    148 Easy Chocolate Cake flour I Fablespoons cocoa 3 TTY powde 2 powder 220 9 Sugark 3/4 cup 3/4 cup melted butter 2 eggs Frosting: of still the cup) 3 4-5 Falle der Su speons thick
    via simplytheyu from Getty Images
  • 15
    I'm honestly speechless. I'm not the sort of person to blow up or make a scene, I hate any kind of conflict and would rather curl up in a ball in the corner... so I finish helping washing up
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 16
    and head back into the living room where the gathering had moved to. I just sit there dissociated from all conversations trying to fight the tears, until Ex says "hey are you okay? Didn't you enjoy your meal"
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 17
    At this point all reason goes out the window and I do something I've never do, I start scream-shouting and crying all at the same time to the point where the room is silent and I'm on the floor.
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 18
    My partner holding me trying to calm me, everyone stunned and ex just sitting there in shock as it's only just dawned on him the gravity of what
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 19
    he's done. Once calmer I was finally able to get the words out in a language everyone could understand. "That's my recipe book in your kitchen"
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 20
    My partner immediately looked ped as he knew how long I'd been looking for that book and how many times I'd cried over it.
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 21
    My ex stood and said "I didn't think you'd be this upset over a recipe book. Truth is I liked your cooking so much and just took it"
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 22
    He was worried he was gonna miss my cooking? He knew what that book meant to me.
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 23
    His fiancé raced into the kitchen oblivious to why this was such a big deal. Grabbed the book
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 24
    This comes and gives it to me saying "I'm so sorry, I'm not really sure what's going on and I don't need to know, this is obviously something incredibly precious and he had no right taking it from you"
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 25
    After that we kinda just left, some of my friend who were also there knew what the book meant so as we were leaving we could hear them ripping him a new one...
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 26
    Safe to say we are no longer friends, I'm not even sure his fiancé his still with him lol.
    via u/Spectacle-Bear

  • Sometimes, you don't see the red flags until way after the breakup, unfortunately.

  • 27
    Anyways it's strange how whole again I feel now. My Partner gets too eat my families recipes to which he said the first time he tried "it's nice to finally meet them in a way"
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 28
    Sorry this turned into such a big ranting story woof I just scrolled up congrats if you made it to the end! මම Meatballs are on me!
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 29
    Cheezburger Image 10547842560
    via psphotograph from Getty Images Pro
  • 30
    girltuesday Take a photo of every single page & make copies. Also, wow.
    via u/girltuesday
  • 31
    Spectacle-Bear OP Hah honestly my partner said the same thing, and I might make one or 2 as back ups. but there's still blank pages for me to fill.
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 32
    Cosmicshimmer I don't get it. You were friends. At any point, he could have just asked for a copy of the recipes! He didn't have to steal it from you. I'm glad you have it back.
    via u/Cosmicshimmer
  • 33
    Spectacle-Bear OP Yeah, I don't think there was any logic going through his brain. My partner thinks he still had feelings but broke up to please me
    via u/Spectacle-Bear
  • 34
    Fall_Ad_654 What makes it more complex is, he should've known you would recognize the smell. He asked his (ex) fiance to cook it for the night... It all seems so messed up from his part
    via u/Fall_Ad_654

Tags

boyfriend relationship advice cooking adulting recipe friends relationships girlfriend couples exes love breakup red flag Reddit dating entitled people
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