'I would rather end our marriage than move': Divorced dad makes hard decision to divorce wife because he doesn't want to uproot his children to another state based on her children with her ex-husband

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Sep 4, 2025 12:00 PM EDT

Marriage and dating is hard enough for single young people without the baggage of exes with children, much less when you've already been married and divorced and have to coordinate and manage with an ex and schedule everything around growing children. The man in the story is married to his wife for 2 years, and they've been together almost 4 years. They both have children from a previous marriage, making it more difficult to manage their relationship. His wife lost total custody of her children, and her ex-husband was given permission to move out of state with the children. This would be a heavy decision on any parent, but she tells her husband it's too hard for her to be away from her children. She wants to move with them, but her husband doesn't. He tells her that they have to break up for the kids. 

Sometimes love isn't enough, and often times it gets harder with children. Albeit, without children, it's also not enough. Love has never been enough, and the world isn't a fairy tale. To get a taste of what real life is like, read the full story below. 

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  • 01

    AITA for being willing to end my marriage because I refuse to uproot my kids from their life to follow my stepkids?

    Cheezburger Image 10549531136
    via Milos Dimic / Canva

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    My wife and I have been together for 4 years, married for almost 2. We both have kids. My daughter is 11 and my son is 9. We lost
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  • 03
    their mom when they were younger. My wife had been divorced for many years and shared custody of her 15 and 16
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  • 04
    year old's with her ex until a few months ago when he was granted permission to move to another state with their kids, because their kids wanted to go with their dad.
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  • 05
    My wife doesn't want to be away from her kids for long periods of time and she has told me she's moving. She feels like she needs to be near her kids. I support this.
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  • 06
    But I won't move my kids away from family, friends and stability to do this. My kids don't want to move either. They heard my wife
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  • 07
    mention it several weeks ago and they told me they don't want to leave. They'd miss everyone too much.
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  • 08
    I already know the life my kids have here is what they need and where they thrive. I explained this to my wife and she was defeated.
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  • 09
    She told me we can't make a marriage work if I'm here and she's there and I said I agree and I told her I believe the best way
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  • 10
    forward would be to divorce. She was upset by this, of course, and we talked and I comforted her and she asked me if there was
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  • 11
    anything she could say or do to make me reconsider. I told her I won't move my children and I would never ask her to be apart
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  • 12
    Definition of divorce Eng Divorce The le nt body.
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    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 13
    from her kids for months at a time. I said we're both committed to the best interest of our individual children and that
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  • 14
    means doing what's right for them even if it's not right for us as a couple.
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  • 15
    She asked for us to talk it out some more and we have. We've talked about it extensively but all the while she has been making
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  • 16
    arrangements for a place where her ex and kids now live and a new job. I think she believed I would change my mind the more
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  • 17
    we discussed everything but I have not and now she's angry that I would rather our marriage end than move so we can all be together as a family.
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  • 18
    FAMILY
    via hidesy / Canva

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 19
    But I know this is not what's best for my kids. AITA?
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  • 20
    OkMix4193.23h ago NTA. You're putting your kids' stability first, and that's exactly what a parent should do. It s ks for your
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  • 21
    marriage, but forcing them to move away from their entire support system would be unfair.
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  • 22
    Your wife is doing what she feels she has to for her kids, and you're doing the same for yours. It's heartbreaking,
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  • 23
    but sometimes love isn't enough when kids are involved.
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  • 24
    ayesh00 23h ago NTA You both are putting the kids first which is what good parents do.
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  • 25
    Unfortunately the kids needs are at odds so that means the marriage has to take a back seat until they are all adults. Good luck
    via u/ayesh00

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family drama marriage drama family feud relationships lol divorce love family moving breakup reddit thread Reddit funny money children dating
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